Reviews for Holly Evans and the Spiral Path
Isa Lumitus chapter 47 . 3/12/2015
I can't help but think that Holly should have killed the minister as soon Bones said that she was legally allowed to do so. Given his past behavior, he's going to keep trying to destroy Holly until he dies, or she gets unlucky.

I put good odds on her ability to pull it off. Between him being weak, and Holly having the initiative, she'd just have to be quick about it.
Isa Lumitus chapter 45 . 3/12/2015
I'm starting to think that Holly isn't the only one too free with the memory charms. Watching a classmate get hideously injured serves as a valuable lesson. It teaches: Don't piss that person off. It also teaches: This could happen to you if you provoke people.

By obliviating them, you steal that learning experience. Imagine for a moment if the Dursleys were allowed to remember what Holly did to them, and that they only lived because other mages stepped in. Vernon would not have been stupid enough to kill Hedwig. He might have tried to kill Holly directly... But she probably would live through that and justifiably kill him in retaliation.

Instead, some of the most important lessons in How-to-not-get-killed are stolen, and people keep making the same mistakes.

Also, sounds like Draco needs to be fixed via the three step plan.
Isa Lumitus chapter 43 . 3/12/2015
Of all the morally questionable things that Holly has done, there's only one thing that actually bugs me. That would be that she's a bit too free with memory charms on people that trust her. She uses them like the Imperious Curse.

The homunculus? Well, I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't feel guilty in her shoes for doing that. But I actually don't hold that against her, regardless of whether she felt guilty. I guess that's the difference between intellect and emotion. Intellectually, I feel she did no wrong. Emotionally? It's kind of sickening that she created a life of suffering, and then snuffed it when it outlived its usefulness.
Isa Lumitus chapter 40 . 3/12/2015
First off, I totally called that both Harry and Holly would have to compete. Also, I wonder what the odds are that I'll find Princess of the Blacks in your favorites?

Second: Ugh. Religion. You had plenty of foreshadowing that Hermione was christian, though. And seeing her get worked up about something other than SPEW is a welcome deviation from most fics. Originality is good.

Last, while I have no real problem with text-wall chapters... I tend to forget things that I wanted to say in the comments.
Isa Lumitus chapter 36 . 3/11/2015
Prediction 1: Holly is going to suffer for not having killed McNair the first time he imperio'd her. She might have pulled a save if she could have gotten him to lead her out of the public eye and instituted the Three Step Plan, now.

Prediction 2: Holly is going to suffer for not having blown Prof. Dumb's head off with the shotgun. Yes, I know that it would have been too public to get away with. She still might have been better off leaving 'Holly' as a scary fugitive while she got practice being 'Harry'.
Isa Lumitus chapter 35 . 3/11/2015
Gawddammit, Holly. Do you know why you suffer in life? Because you refuse to learn. The world keeps on giving you all the hints you need to learn to use the Three Step Plan. And it will keep hurting you until you finally wise up. Or until deus ex machina saves the day... But that only happens in stories.
Isa Lumitus chapter 33 . 3/11/2015
I think I like your portrayal of Luna. Most everyone else has her spacy and overly innocent. This makes a good change of pace, while keeping her fey nature. And it explains why almost everyone else hates her.

I think that McG needs to do some reading in the ethics detentions. Heinlein's Starship Troopers for where proper morals come from. Thomas Malthus for an understanding that short-sighted fools will always exceed the population's carrying capacity and cause an explosion of human misery. And Ender's Game to describe the virtues of permanently disposing of enemies.

Also, I think Prof. Dumb needs to be introduced to my three step plan. He may be the lynchpin of magical Britain, but if it can't get by without an arserag like him, it deserves to rot.
Isa Lumitus chapter 27 . 3/10/2015
I have a new theory in HP-verse, about how to solve all problems in canon, and in most stories. It's a three step plan:

1. Kill the jerk involved, in private.
2. Vanish the body. Burn it to ash first if needed.
3. Obliviate yourself of the memory. If the rules of a specific fic prevent memory charming yourself, find a partner and use a well-worded unbreakable vow.
Isa Lumitus chapter 23 . 3/10/2015
The line about McG's hypocrisy in giving Holly ethics lessons was a good one.

Also, I think they need some authors added. Like Nietzsche, and Machiavelli. Maybe some Malthus, too. Wait. Ender's Game. I've been thinking for a while that reading that one might give Holly some interesting character development. Though that character development might lead to Holly attempting to topple the Ministry, if taken to its conclusion.
Isa Lumitus chapter 12 . 3/10/2015
Ok. I gotta say, I'm liking the basilisk fight.
Isa Lumitus chapter 10 . 3/10/2015
I just realized something. McG was under a truth oath when she said that the diary was linked to another book. So if Harry lives behind Holly's eyes, who's reading the linked copy? Supposedly, Dumbles has no access to the book. But what if he lied to McG when he said that?
Isa Lumitus chapter 8 . 3/10/2015
I still don't think Harry exists. Holly is the survivor of that night, and 'Harry' was made up to keep anyone from looking for her.

Alternatively, Holly is not in her natural form, thus causing bad reactions with anything else meant to change her. And Harry has never been seen. I wonder where he could be?
Isa Lumitus chapter 1 . 3/10/2015
I'm guessing that Holly is an unreliable narrator. And that Harry doesn't actually exist.
HJP4Life chapter 3 . 3/3/2015
Another nicely written chapter. The horse cock part had me laughing.
HJP4Life chapter 2 . 3/3/2015
Interesting start, curious to see how you play it out.
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