Reviews for Conception
Saavikam69 chapter 1 . 12/13/2014
Hemholtz dead then alive? Your writing is fine. Was it a virtual war the controllers did? That's why H is alive? Wow!
a non name is chapter 1 . 8/30/2011
Very interesting. I like your execution.
Tassel630 chapter 1 . 3/4/2010
Helmholtz! How could you? My second-favorite character, too!

So, the concrit.

The negative: overall, I think this would be better of in a prose format. In order to make it work as a poem, some of your rhyming is forced and awkward, and a story format affords much more room for description and detail. If you're really set on poetry, I think it needs to be more structured, with separate stanzas and a regular rhyme scheme. (If you have separate stanzas but the fanfiction format won't preserve them, you can use shiftenter to create a single line break and save the double line breaks for stanza separation.)

The positive: a fascinating story that twists around what we thought we knew about BNW. We don't really find out Bernard and Helmholtz's fates, and this was a very interesting take on the possibilities. Good job.