Laff off with the cursing man! Almost every two fucking dialogues i see one and whodafk wears fkin weight in a fuckin battle it fkin seems naruto is infected with fukin lee stupidity. They're fkin ninja fuckityfuckwit

You are shit, tazuna barely even explained why he's attacked by shinobi and you said its A RANK? they're fkin chunin for gods sake atleast get in there that kakashi explained that they're the demon bros and that they usually work for zabuza so that its a fkin reasonable to be possible as A RANK! YOU ARE SHIT!

danzo imo is the original pedomaru and mde the snake pedomaru.

Looking forward to Chapter 17.

i really feel bad for the hyuga. other than being a glorified telescope and x-ray there's nothing else use for their eyes.

I mean.. with hardwork anyone can target the vital points. example: tsunade. the fact that you can even put some seal to counter that is just depressing.

although i guess they did that to themselves. their backwards mentality of following tradition instead of trying other branches of jutsu. like imagine a hyuga that have a bow and arrow. or a hyuga with iryo ninjutsu (medical jutsu). how about the most broken branch of jutsu also known as fuinjutsu.

sht. their eyes are practically made for those.

Dude, naruto can make hundreds of kage bunshin and youre telling me he used two jutsu and knocked himself put… yeah no. Those jutsu qpuld have annihilated the entire forest had he pumped that much chakra into them. At this point in time he has almos as much chakra as Hiruzen my dude, probably more as even Hiruzen can’t make that many clones. This was way to forced just for him to encounter Haku, like, grossly forced.

This is brain dead. Good on you for realizing that and stopping writing. Hope you abandoned writing entirely.

Well I am hoping that you understand that I am wanting to impart some honest feedback so your next story will be better and I will be enjoying that one. Please don’t hate me I just want to give my thoughts out. First,I really like how you developed Naruto. It felt natural and I wish that was how Naruto would develop in canon. You were right by the way. Nature affinity does not mean you only have that one affinity. A ninja can learn any affinity with work. I like that Naruto is smart in this story. I dislike how canon Naruto was all over the place with his smarts. One time he is brainless,the next Naruto is outsmarting Zabuza. So I like the idea that Naruto is smart but socially awkward. Next thing I wish to discuss is the girls. I understand that you wanted to write Naruto x Ino but I am hoping that in the next story you write that you will have a better girl for Naruto. Anko Miterashi. Anko and Naruto have so much in common. Both are outcasts,hated by Konoha for events beyond their control. Both are passionate and impulsive and fun loving people. Both are named after food. Ino is just another Sasuke fan girl. Yes some people can write a good Ino, but I still have a hard time getting past her fan girl tendencies. Anko on the other hand has depth and many facets that have yet to be explored. She deserves better than she got in canon. And yes I hate Sakura. Sasuke has been written many different ways because he is a complex character like Anko. Some write Sasuke as a jerk while others write him gradually being more mellow thanks to Naruto. I hope you understand what I was trying to say and use this feedback on your next story.

damn bro guess this nigga died on us
no update

You should have put the Smart!Naruto' tag in the description, so that everyone can tell he will remain the same or trying hard to be smart. Maybe it has something to do with IQ, but 90% of writers who write 'Smart!Naruto' in their description know jack shit about how a smart person behaves. You didn't claim any, but you should warn everyone that he would remain an oyster (it doesn't have a brain).

Hiruzen is scummier than he already is in canon. Knocking an emotional boy whom you have been lying to for his whole life with a killing intent? How grand. I applaud the chivalry, truly. He should've thanked Naruto for being the human sacrifice and keeping his joke of a village safe. Everyone should. The only reason Naruto became an inspirational story is that Naruto is too dumb to listen to his brain. If Sasuke or anyone with a functioning brain were the one in Naruto's shoes, Konoha would have either lost their Junchūriki or disappeared from the map.

Hiruzen is scummier than he already is in canon. Knocking an emotional boy whom you have been lying to for his whole life with a killing intent? How grand. I applaud the chivalry, truly. He should've thanked Naruto for being the human sacrifice and keeping his joke of a village safe. Everyone should. The only reason Naruto became an inspirational story is that Naruto is too dumb to listen to his brain. If Sasuke or anyone with a functioning brain were the one in Naruto's shoes, Konoha would have either lost their Junchūriki or disappeared from the map.

You know, it would be truly hilarious if all those cat excuses turned out to be true lmao

spent so much time on the translations when you could've just had them adapted to the language you're writing. kinda wasteful, when you could just do the english name for each jutsu, since you know them all apparently, considering you're writing the translation at the end.. like yes us english reading audience definitely want the Japanese words in English alphabet for the names of the attacks...totally helps with the imagery that pops in the mind.. oh wait no it doesn't, because it's in a different language, so no imagery happens since they are not words we naturally associate with whatever attack youre saying is happening.. since we read everything in English...

So far so good. I enjoy Naruto stories where Naruto actually has different powers that make sense . A ninja needs variety of skills and powers. I know I mentioned my strong dislike of Sakura but I don’t want her dead. I do want her to pay for abuse of Naruto though, I hope that’s where this is going. It seems that here Naruto is cracking Sasuke attitude and getting through to him. I like these stories as opposed to straight up bashing. It makes the characters seem more human,that they do make bad decisions like the rest of us and have consequences for those decisions.