|Reviews for Blood of an Innocent|
| Potterformers chapter 18 . 6/6/2013
Potterformers says, "Fuck off Dumbledore, it is time you leave Harry top be what he wishes without been control to do so."
| Grammar matters chapter 1 . 2/26/2013
'Prelog' is the name of a town in Slovenia and another in Croatia. It is also an Eastern-European surname, and, as the 'Prelog strain' is the name for a specific chemical interaction. Since none of these are even remotely related to the introductory chapter of your story, I can only assume you meant 'Prologue'.
Everyone makes mistakes, and they aren't anything major in the body of a chapter, but misspelling the title of the chapter is just lazy. Sorry.
It's a shame, because the chapter itself (cliches aside) is very well written and quite outstanding for a story of this type. It has a believable and logical chain of events which lead to the story's premise: Harry's imprisonment in Azkaban. This is genuinely rare for stories with this premise, and I applaud you for it.
Keep up the good writing!
All the best.
| misteryman526 chapter 23 . 7/9/2012
Well, it was an interesting take on the King!Harry theme. I think that Harry's resurrection made him too powerful for the reader to sympathize with him, so perhaps making another person the central character could have made the story more personal. The weakest part of the story though, was the unjustified imprisonment in Azkaban. Having Fudge decide to prosecute Harry is very believable, since he's abused his position as Minister many times before, but I've read very few stories that portrayed Dumbledore and his friends turning against him in a believable fashion. If you could come up with a reasonable explanation at the start for Sirius, Dumbledore, etc., to turn against him it would help the story a lot. You'd have to add a bit after James and Lily return where Dumbledore discovers how they were duped into believing Harry's guilt (my favorite was a story where the Veratiserum at Harry's trial was switched with a potion that made him say whatever the brewer wanted him to say). I think that having a semi-reasonable explanation for his conviction makes it more likely that Harry would forgive his former friends instead of avenging his injuries on them.
| Rori Potter chapter 23 . 6/8/2012
| Xterker23 chapter 22 . 6/8/2012
| fireburnshot chapter 3 . 2/26/2011
Dumbledork seems to always make the wrong decision and regret it later...this time it's WAY to late.
| fireburnshot chapter 2 . 2/26/2011
something so very touching about the 'goodby'
| fireburnshot chapter 1 . 2/26/2011
I like this version...it gives much more background, and the feelings of the characters.
| sarenelsoria chapter 23 . 9/5/2010
all and al a satifying tale, however there is a spelling error around chapter 20 it ends with hi when I presume you meant to say him.
| gauravmittal2 chapter 23 . 6/24/2010
| Neumzie chapter 7 . 2/15/2010
really sad, but you really need a beta
| Neumzie chapter 6 . 2/15/2010
wait wait wait, so if harry did have those 6 people's friendship, and ginny's love, then why did he die? at least 4 of them were actively his friends. thats more than sirius had
| Neumzie chapter 5 . 2/15/2010
"he had let Harry go to his grave thinking he had almost nothing"
pfft, THINKING he had nothing? he DID have nothing. except for ginny, but they didnt know that. not really
| Neumzie chapter 4 . 2/15/2010
"...him alive this long, FOR if I had abandoned him..."
who talks like that?
"And the men of the order just looked shocked especially Ron stunned at what he had done to his friend and how he could have saved him, who finally began to realise what he had done to the boy who thought of him as a father"
you never actually mentioned arthur, and you need commas
you should probably put exclamation points during ginny's last rant, seeing as she's screaming.i thought she was talking calmly, see as they had been before. also, these chapters are really short. again, really interesting concept for the story, it just needs some work
| Neumzie chapter 3 . 2/15/2010
this seems a little thin. a simple sorry would never be enough, and they would all know that. they would not immediately rush after them to do it, they'd still be in shock. i didnt think portkeys could EVER go directly into azkaban as it would be a security issue. its good writing, you just need to flesh it out a little more