|Reviews for Pure Chance|
| Eru no Tsubasa chapter 6 . 10/10/2011
Very interesting! I hope you continue this! XD
| GentleMidnightSnow chapter 5 . 6/15/2009
Could you speed up a bit? Please? This fanfic is supposed to be about Fai and Kurogane, right? So, most of it should be about them, not syaoran and Sakura, am I correct? Aside from that, I LOVE IT! I think it's so cool that Fai's a pure-blood. I've never thought about that idea!
| applepielover chapter 5 . 5/23/2009
You're welcome as always. *Hugs*
I love the part with Sakura and Mokona. Good to see more fics with her defending herself. HUGE props to you on that.
The only thing is to remove "Flashblack" during the part with Kurogane's memory.
Take your time in updating.
"Instantly his rips screamed in protest." ribs (?).
"Was she realas well or just an illusion?" real as.
"Sakura giggled as Windom glared at her brother angrily." Windam.
"Bitting her lip to keep any nerves at bay, she breathed in deeply and looked up into her Otou-san’s eyes." Biting.
"Actually you brother carved it." your.
"Hauling her back the third rider swore as her noticed the bracelet on Sakura’s arm." as he.
"Syaoran sat quietly as he watched cheery blossoms flitter through the air around him." cherry.
| Fai'swingedchronicles chapter 4 . 5/7/2009
oh no Syarons in trouble! I wonder who really killed her! (though I doubt shes dead...has she planed everything out or something?)
Poor Fai but at least his fine now.
| LaguNerd chapter 4 . 5/3/2009
I love this story, it's so detailed and I love how your putting in so many characters. Please update soon, I can't wait to see what happens next.
| FlamingPurpleBunnies chapter 4 . 4/16/2009
YaY! new Chapter!
I really liked this chapter! You have to put the second part up as soon as possible! XD
Dude, your so detailed (and thats NOT a bad thing, and the stuff at the bottom wasreally cool to read . !
hehe keep up the f-a-b-u-l-o-u-s (did I spell that right o.0) work~
| Melissa Brite chapter 4 . 4/16/2009
Love it alot. Please write the next chapter as soon as you can.
| applepielover chapter 4 . 4/16/2009
This chapter is definitely worth the wait. Don't worry about posting sooner, take your time.
Awesome storytelling. You're so creative (I really, really, mean it.) And keep the character and world lists. They're really helpful.
The bonus story was well done too. I really like how you write it in Chii's perspective. Great job! :D
"‘She blamed him?" Quotation mark at the end.
A huge part of the ceremony included a years-worth of travelling outside of the village," Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think it's years' worth.
“That necklace needs to be in good condition when I return it. Right now I want to enjoy this fight and so, as to avoid smashing it, I will entrust you to take care of it until I’m done." Quotation mark at the end.
"Kurogane glanced at the Chobit girl is surprise and shook his head." I believe it's in surprised (I can suggest that it be replaced with another word.)
“Oh crap...” Kurogane bit his lip and tried to avoid to being sick." I believe it's tried to avoid being sick.
"Kurogane knelt down placed a hand on the man’s shoulder and silently prayed that most of the blood had come from those men and not this ‘Fai’ person." I believe "and" should be between down and placed.
"Shinning blue eyes stared up at him, which were then were hidden from view as the blond buried his head in Kurogane’s coat." Shining.
Realising the man had lost unconscious;" Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe it's consciousness.
"He couldn’t even forfill Ashura’s wish." Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think it's fulfill.
"“What’s this?” Fai’s eyes widened Chii sat in front of Ashura, her face turned towards him." I believe "as" should be between widened and Chii.
“Is Kurogane feeling sad...because he Fai was hurt before Kurogane came?” I believe it's because Fai was hurt.
"Kurogane stared at the Chobit girl is shock then glared." in shock.
"which means he and Watanuki are nest in line for the throne" next.
"Unfortunately Gigie is dead is dead in the fic." Gigie is dead in the fic.
"I was necessary for the plot but it still makes me sad." It was.
| Fai'swingedchronicles chapter 3 . 4/5/2009
I think you shouldnt add "certain" scenes unless you think their necessary or go with the story. By go with the story I mean that they dont sound like you put it there and it did not ruin that chapter. Im happy Fai was saved though yay for kuro-pon
| FlamingPurpleBunnies chapter 3 . 4/4/2009
hehehehe new chapie! (and a good one to boot too XD)
Poor Fai! My poor poor baby... wah *tear*
But at least he got rescued by his amazing knight in shining armor .
*fangirl scream* hehe I'm in total yaoi mode right now :D
UPDATE SOON OR ELSE I WILL FIND OUT WHERE YOU LIVE AND MAKE YOU WRITE XD
(jk take your time ])
| applepielover chapter 3 . 4/4/2009
You're welcome. Glad that I was able to help. /
Of course I'm digging this story. I look forward to the next chapter when you're able to (take your time.) And I love your bonus stories.
“Stupid, getting worked up over something like.” Unless it's intentional, it's something like this.
"He shook his head empty of dumb thoughts and stared up the sky." I believe "at" should be between up and the.
“A little walk on way back couldn’t hurt.” I believe "the" should be between on and way.
Chii had immediately looked at the blocked street and asked if he had wanted take the longer main street back to the hotel." I believe "to" should be between wanted and take.
"Chii here is one of the sweetest girls I’ve ever met?" Is this a question? It looks like a sentence to me.
"Though he hadn’tknown her for very long, somehow Chii had become someone very important to Fai." hadn't known.
"I also hateanybody who uses magic." hate anybody.
“Why don’t just do to him what we’re gonna to the girl?” I believe "you" (or "we") should be between don't and just.
"Kurogane snorted in satisfaction and turned to face the girl he had just recued." rescued.
"He walked over as the girl the girl struggled to get to her feet." as the girl struggled.
"In the centre of the group a small flash of gold shone out for underneath the red." from.
| Melissa Brite chapter 3 . 4/4/2009
Love it. Please write more.
| moongoat chapter 3 . 4/4/2009
Don't feel guilty! It was written very well. And when it went
I got dizzy.
I have a correction though, my username is Apple Psyche. But that's okay. xD
| FlamingPurpleBunnies chapter 2 . 4/2/2009
XD Dude your soo cool! I never realized that all of these characters showed up in tsubasa :D NOw it's like a fog has been lifted up in front of my eyes. I'll have to go back and re-read everything XD.
Anywho, god chapter~ I'll keep waiting for the next
| applepielover chapter 2 . 4/2/2009
Don't worry about rushing into the story. I like how it's going so far since it introduces the other characters that will take part. And I don't mind about it also being KuroTomo. This is a good fanfic from what I've read and I wouldn't mind it being KuroFai and KuroTomo (props to you in not creating a KuroOC/FaiOC pairing.) Although whenever I think of Princess Tomoyo, I think of the Tomoyo from Cardcaptor Sakura who only loves Sakura.
"Tomoyo's sudden laughter cut though Kurogane's crazy monolog." through.
“Youcannotcome with me, Kurogane." I know that it's intentional for the dialogue, but I can suggest using dashes in between the three words at the beginning if you want.
“It for that girl you like so much. Isn’t it.” It's. Also, a period at the end.