|Reviews for International magic|
| Jesternz chapter 27 . 8/15
International Magic by Zephyrus Anemnoi Fiction
Rating: 7.5 out of 10
Pros: First of all, this is an excellent concept for a story! I really enjoy the idea of Harry and company going to Japan to escape the 5th year debacle. I also, honestly enjoy how Ron Weasley is portrayed in this story. Yes, he gets OOC, but he is given a reason to get OOC. And this particular Ron is actually one of the better Ron Weasleys I have read. Furthermore, I enjoy how the author attempts to blend the two worlds together to create a cohesive universe.
Cons: Mechanically, this story has some flaws. While far from illiterate, there are enough issues to trip you up as you read it. Of particular note seems to be the author’s tendency to confuse homophones: “Out of site” instead of “Out of sight”. Continuing on the technical issues, , the author does have some problems with Japanese honorifics. Specifically, he has Hermione refer to Setsuna as –sempai repeatedly when referencing lessons that Setsuna is teaching her about Kendo (In the Shimmieryu school nonetheless). Mokoto would have a fit! The honorific –sempai is used for someone who has seniority over you, and its counterpart is –kohei. For example, Fred and George Weasley would be Weasley-sempai to Harry’s Potter-kohei. The honorific that the author is looking for is actually –sensei (unless it was Ku teaching her martial art, then it is –sifu). The –sensei honorific is used for someone who is educated (like a doctor) or someone who is educating you (like a teacher or martial arts instructor). The honorific –sifu is actually the Chinese equivalent. Lastly there is the whole boya thing. I know Evangeline A.K. McDowell has a tendency to call him boya, but Asuna actually call Negi ‘Negi-bozu’ instead of ‘Negi-baka’. Baka, as any good anime fan knows means ‘idiot/fool’ and is generally considered extremely rude. The –bozu honorific means ‘little boy’. I know that the honorifics can be confusing , and I lived in Japan for 3 years!
Another major issue for me is that the author has a tendency to get distracted from the story he is writing and ends up wandering into the unnecessary. Every chapter is bracketed by Authors Notes. In this case I would ask that if you have something to put into Author Notes, either do it at the beginning of the chapter or at the end. Doing both comes off as self-promoting. The author also has a tendency to get distracted IN the story itself. For one thing, the author focuses on things at the oddest times. Why do we have so much information on American Dust Bunnies? Or why did you need to tell me that an American magical suit-thingy was $200 (and I assume you meant USD? Given that none of the characters in that scene are familiar with USD?) I also think he is playing a game with the readers by dropping references to some of his favorite things in the story to be picked up on. At best, like when he does the Freakazoid reference, it is kind of annoying but short enough you can push past it. At worst, when he plugs his friend’s webcomic , it actually completely derails the chapter. While I appreciate the humor he is trying to bring about, it takes a good story and makes it way too cracky. This story is over 67k words, and I honestly feel like way too much of it is unnecessary. The author even admits that he has written a couple of ‘filler’ chapters.
Speaking of the filler chapters, the author includes two of them for character development. One of them, the chapter dedicated to Ron Weasley is actually pretty important to the story. I understand and appreciate that the chapter was necessary for Ron to fill into the role the author wants him in and I am really ok with that! Ron needed that growth, and I loved reading it. What I didn’t love was the filler chapters beforehand, nor the other character development chapter. They weren’t needed because they do nothing for the story. Instead of giving us filler chapters, why didn’t the author gives us maybe some P.O.V vignettes for the principle characters to help develop them more. Instead it feels like the author is expecting every reader to have an in-depth knowledge of Negima, Negima?!, both animes and a passing knowledge of Harry Potter.
I guess that leads to my biggest complaint about this crossover: It’s not a crossover. It is Negima story with some Harry Potter cameos. You will go chapters in this story with only a reference to ANY of the Harry Potter characters. When they Harry Potter characters DO show up, they are treated unevenly. Ron, he gets developed. His ‘Not learning ninja’ training would be something I actually would WANT in a ‘filler’ chapter, as it shows the character growing and stepping out of his normal shell and into the environment that he has found himself in. Hermoine learning kendo is random, but cool I guess. Harry, though, is almost a static figure. Here in the South we would say Harry, in this story, is ‘as useless as tits on a boar hog.’ In 27 chapters, he only features in 3. Furthermore, in one of his three appearances, he gets molly whopped! By Chapter 27, I have honestly stopped caring about the Hogwarts Trio in this story. When Harry does show up and take over in Chapter 27, it is a shock.
Overall: This is a good story with some pretty big flaws for me. I would love to see more of the story, but as it hasn’t been updated in almost a year, I am not holding out hope for a new chapter. Sad, as this tale has a LOT of potential.
| Ashmole chapter 3 . 7/30
I am pretty sure that Harry would side with Hermione at some point because Ron can really be an Abrasive A$$
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/29
Harry has seen a computer. Dudley breaks his in book 1.
| Joe chapter 27 . 4/11
Please update this soon. I really like this fic because it combines the two series really well while remembering what makes both series so much fun; the moments of character development and fluff between the action sequences that give Harry Potter and Negima the solid core that all great franchises need.
It would really make my day if we could have a few more chapters soon.
| s1havingFun chapter 3 . 11/11/2014
great fic !
i can't keep from laughing, you know i m mostly fan of Negima, and you're dead on the tone.
The only thing that's a little bit different - well other than all this crossover stuff : Setsuna is a short girl (but i don't mind it if you choose to make her taller, afterall this is your Fanfic).
Now back to frenzy reading :)
| Balagor chapter 27 . 11/11/2014
I rather like this story. No sign of major curbstomping on one genre over the other, and we see both main characters being active.
| Vangran chapter 27 . 7/23/2014
Well this story just keeps getting better and better.
| Ranmaleopard chapter 1 . 5/25/2014
Please tell me that Harry is paired with Hermione, Tonks, Evangeline McDowell,
| jgkitarel chapter 27 . 5/4/2014
Of course the old man would try and play matchmaker with his granddaughter. Not as much of a surprise, considering that she's the heir of the family and is expected to have a child.
| Orchamus chapter 20 . 4/10/2014
Not gonna lie, this Ron is kinda funny. Useful sounding bloke to have on your side too.
| Orchamus chapter 9 . 4/10/2014
Why in the world would it be uncomfortable to have Konoka going ecchi on Setsuna? That's an expected thing in Negima, and one most people expect after a certain time.
| Orchamus chapter 1 . 4/10/2014
Huh...not quite sure how to go on this one, looks okay so far, but the magic mix and stuff has me a little leery. Still, here's to hoping for a good read! As for things like a pairing...honestly, the idea of Eva and Harry sends me into a choking fit of laughter. But the one that seems best for this...Asuna, they can relate on a lot, and not simply due to similarities, like work ethic(when Harry is forced to do his chores to live at the Dursleys and Asuna works to pay for herself, maybe help inspire a REAL work ethic in Harry), or on things they are similar on, like their orphan status, having crazy friends, other stuff. Besides, I just see Asuna as a good influence on Harry.
Actually, two girls might work best for Harry...maybe Chisame or Yue too?
| chris678 chapter 1 . 2/25/2014
no, no, no! Harry's a little caterpillar only instead of time in a cocoon he needs to be brutally exposed to the reality of the world and realize that Voldemort's right (not on the whole pure-blood thing), the magical world is stagnant and needs dark lords because they force progress, and harry defeated one at 17! that beats Dumbledore by 47 years he's the perfect dark lord, plus he has a muggle background so he had an elementary school education, we never actually see the education of Pre-Hogwarts pure-bloods. maybe the reason Ron's a terrible student is because he's borderline illiterate or at least has little to no non reading academic ability.
| Joe chapter 27 . 1/19/2014
It really made my day to see this fic updated again.
I'll be interested to see how this Omai subplot plays out; obviously, Konoka not asking for another meeting as usual is one way it could go. Of course, that would mean that there was some other point to this subplot. Could this be how the Ala Alba find out about Harry being an orphan and his personal history with Voldemort? Negi and Eva know, of course, but the only thing we know the others know is that Harry is on Voldemort's hit list. The others finding out about Harry's past seems too big a thing to simply happen 'offscreen'.
Of course, the other outcome of the Omai is that Konoka becomes interested enough in Harry to request another 'date', leading to a Harry, Konoka, Setsuna love triangle (or OT3 :-) ).
| Aaml-sp5 chapter 27 . 1/18/2014
I swear to Haruhi, Imma be cutting a bish if this ends up having a HarryXKonoka pairing. Nobody messes with KonoSetsu!
Sorry, I don't talk like that, I was just outraged at the thought of HarryXKonoka rather than KonoSetsu. Now that I've gotten it out I feel a bit better. But seriously, the KONOSETSU! If I were an evil enough person, I would probably actually uphold the first part of this review. But I'm not, so don't worry about that. The worst I can do is stop reading this otherwise awesome story.