Reviews for The Hokage is Splitsville
EDK chapter 1 . 4/8/2009
Hm... Looks like we have yet another worthy contender for Perfect Lionheart’s ‘Missing Hokage’ challenge! I've read all the other contestants so far and this one has grabbed my attention because we get into a greater depth of detail with how some of the characters are portrayed.

Good old Tsunade, dishing out karmic punishment to doctors who refused to treat a patient, just because of what he contained. As for those reviewers who are complaining, saying that Naruto wasn’t injured that badly in canon, remember this ISN’T canon! For all we know, the battle in the Valley Of The End could have been much fiercer and intense which resulted in Naruto taking a lot more punishment, so much in fact that even the Kyuubi couldn’t heal it up fast enough… Remember folks, while Naruto had to hold back because he was trying to bring Sasuke back alive and in one piece, Sasuke didn’t have that problem! In fact, he was even trying to unlock the next stage of the Sharingan, which requires you to kill someone that you hold close to you…

Dumbass civilian council (not to mention an old warmonger that refuses to let things settle down, despite the fact that peace was the only reason Konoha was so strong for so long), banishing Naruto like that! Good to see that most of the senior ninja clans didn’t agree with these plans, but they were unfortunately outnumbered… Sure, Danzo may have brought up a few points that have been proven a valid concern (in canon at least), but they still have to remember that it was only because of Naruto that quite a lot (if not all) of Team 7’s missions were actually successful. Without him… well, let’s just say Konoha’s not going to get much repeat business from those places for quite some time to come! Not to mention all the alliances were only made because of him that’ll be broken when word of Naruto’s banishment gets out…

As for Naruto losing control of the Kyuubi chakra, he only loses control over it when he’s pushed beyond his limits or he gets too emotional. In his battle with Neji, he was in total control and never once went too far with regard to hurting his opponent. I personally think that Jiraiya must have accidently messed up the seal while they were both on the three year training trip, in an attempt to draw more of Kyuubi’s power out! And from there on out, every time Naruto actually tapped into Kyuubi’s power, the seal got weaker and weaker…

Man, I loved Tsunade's talk with Sasuke! He actually thought that they were planning on helping him to defeat his brother, only to find out they were going with his "dream" of restoring the clan... Also got a bit of a chuckle at the pain Sasuke went through while he was getting ‘milked’. While I’m a guy and normally would cringe with sympathy pains at that kind of thing, Sasuke is one of the few people I think deserves all that!

Now, let's look at the three 'lucky' candidates selected for restoring Sasuke's clan and each of their reactions to this "mission", as given by Tsunade... First up, we have Sakura and she's ready and willing to get started on doing just that. Unfortunately, in my opinion, this is more then likely what would have happened if Naruto had actually managed to bring Sasuke back in canon! She’s still stuck in her blind devotion to Sasuke stage: even the fact that he wanted nothing to do with her, even knocking her out so he could leave the village despite the fact she was willing to betray the village as well just to go along with him, isn’t getting through to her… In her mind, that just means he’s shy. It took her three years and training sessions from Hell with Tsunade to make her go cold turkey on her infatuation with Sasuke, while he was in Sound, and she still relapsed for a bit when she saw him again! If he’s still in the village, she’s got no chance of growing in strength and mental maturity… Of course, Inner Sakura may change her tune, once she spent a bit more time in closer contact with her crush then ever before! Of course, we could have the irony that Sasuke is not as fertile as the council hoped...

Ino's reaction is also fairly close to what I would expect from her at this point in time of the canon series. Ever since the incident in the Forest of Death, with all of her team seeing the darker and vicious side of Sasuke that Orochimaru’s curse mark revealed (which was always there, the mark just gave him an excuse to explain where it came from), she’s not as sure she once was about marrying him! I even think that’s the key point, where she decided to give up on claiming Sasuke for her husband, in canon… The reports and rumours of his attempted defection to Sound must have also raised more doubts in her mind about his mental stability. The fact that he was willing to fight his own team-mates and almost kill one of them; not to mention the fact that her own team-mates also ended up in the hospital while trying to get him back, just so he could abandon Konoha go to a village led by a traitor who wants nothing more but to burn Konoha to the ground, should really be sending up warning signals… And to make matters worse, there’s every chance he’ll just try to leave the village for Sound again, even if several girls or women have his kids to both restore his clan and anchor him to the village! She’s definitely on the fence at the moment… But, I'm with those who want Ino to wise up and get out of that deal!

Finally, Hinata doesn’t want to marry Sasuke at all, but she is still willing to follow Tsunade’s (actually the council's) orders if she has no other choice in the matter. She’s a real trooper, if her attempt to keep her composure is anything to go by. It really tore me up inside to see her feeling so miserable, not only is she being pressured to marry a jerk like Sasuke by the council, but have his kids as well by in vitro implantation… While she managed to keep her composure while in the office, it didn't last long after she left.

Man, Sakura must really be a rabid Sasuke fan-girl, if she honestly believes that he’s is the greatest guy ever and that any girl should be honoured to be betrothed to him! She just doesn’t care that Hinata honestly wants nothing to do with Sasuke if she can help it. Also, she can’t seem to even see why Hinata would want Naruto more then the walking Ego trip who has a massive stick up his backside… Newsflash Sakura, not every girl is attracted to the whole 'dark brooding' routine, despite how cool you may think it is personally! Fortunately, Ino is not as blindly devoted to Sasuke as she was before and is now starting to ask herself the question: “Is Sasuke really Mister Right for me?” I think the conversation she requested to have with Sasuke will help her make up her mind NOT to take part in the artificial implantation process. His whole attitude seems to be that none of the girls in this village are either worth his time or strong enough to have his children... Not to mention, he’s totally consumed with hatred towards his older brother, which could send him over the edge at any time! While Danzo was forbidden to help rehabilitate Sasuke publicly, there’s nothing stopping him from secretly leaving Sasuke some scrolls that contain powerful techniques that Sasuke can then learn to use on his brother.

So, Tsunade has brought Hinata on board with the plan to possibly leave the village with Naruto & Shizune while Tsunade trains her as her new apprentice… I think that Hiashi would much prefer Hinata to marry Naruto anyway and will accept her desire to leave the village rather then marry a jerk like Sasuke, despite Hinata’s fears that he’d be disappointed in her.

Kakashi's reactions to all the various bits of news haven't been touched on yet and I wonder what they'll be like. Maybe this time, he'll be bummed about failing his sensei’s son (unlike all the other stories) instead of Obito? How will all the other teams take the news that Naruto is to be banished…? Who else will join them, either right away or over time: First off we have Anko, who might want to leave ASAP. After all, if they're going to kick out Naruto, she may be worried that it might not be long before the council decide to get rid of her as well. Next is Ino, who if she decides not to become Sasuke's 'wife', may not want to stick around in case the council want to force her to accept! Then there's Tenten, who'd want to follow her idol... There are a few more I'd like to see come along, but I can't list them all with the tiny amount of space I've got left to me. But before I leave you here's a thought on this generation of Konoha’s flagship team: Team 7, it was doomed to failure from the moment it was designed. Let's face it, putting the top two members of the class (in both bookwork and overall skills) with the rock bottom of the class to balance out the skill levels may seem like a good idea on paper, but without a good idea of their actual personalities and interactions, it’s VERY BAD in practise. If the Third honestly thought that Naruto would help to thaw Sasuke out and make him more loyal to the village, he must have seriously underestimated the sheer size of Sasuke’s ego and Sakura’s blind devotion to him!

While there have been a few triangle relationships in the previous versions of Team 7, they still were all professional enough to keep their head in the game when on a mission. Even Rin, while she had quite a bit of crush on Kakashi, was still able to disagree with him and treat both him and Obito with some amount of impartialness while on a mission. Sakura, on the other hand, is so head over heels for Sasuke; she just can't go against him in any way and even beats up Naruto for every little screw-up she thinks he’s made (real or otherwise). She'd willingly agree to any of Sasuke’s plans, even if they're exactly the same thing that she shot down when Naruto might have suggested it a few seconds ago.

Overall, keep up the awesome work and I hope to see a potential harem, but it's all up to you!
RaiderXV chapter 1 . 4/7/2009
Good job with this story, I give you good marks for no real spelling or grammar mistakes I could find in reading. The story flowed well as did the character develepment. All in all, good job.
Shingen Takeda 1521 chapter 1 . 4/7/2009
Good opening chapter. As a rule, I hate powerful council stories. This one though, is well written and treats the subject matter with great care. Looking forward to more...Cheers!
bandgsecurtiyaw chapter 1 . 4/7/2009
Nice start.
Demon Lord Razgriz chapter 1 . 4/7/2009
Of the storys that's araised from this contest, yours is IMO one of the top 3. I hope you continue writing this and update it regularly.
Kasuchi Koichi chapter 1 . 4/6/2009
This chapter made my stomach twist in knots. Not because it sucks, ‘cause it was awesome and funny, but because of the thought of Hinata carrying evil Uchiha spawn. If she were going carry anybody’s kids it would be little blonde Uzumakis. Also can you make it so Ino refuses? She always seemed to be a lot smarter than Sakura to me and if she accepts then that would be three steps back to stupidity.
daniel 29 chapter 1 . 4/6/2009
You would win for funniest title in the missing hokage challenge at least to me anyway
utoi chapter 1 . 4/6/2009
;)
MonKking chapter 1 . 4/6/2009
What up with the injured Naruto. The only problem that Naruto had was chakra exasution(sp). Sasuke only suffered lost use in his right arm. You make it sound like Naruto was about to die any moment. Also the village has no problem with Naruto, I don't know where you got your info from?
Perfect Lionheart chapter 1 . 4/6/2009
I like it. You've got a strong start going on here, and I look forward to where you take it.

Of interest to note, you've already got me hoping Ino wises up and gets out of there early so she doesn't get caught up into fertilization thing. I mean, it's so far from her dreams, she's not even really a wife under those circumstances, just a baby carrier.

Frankly, I'm hoping she gets out of there with the Hokage and Tsunade chooses some revolting and ugly civilian ladies old enough to be Sakura's mom to be her sister-wives.

But I'm vindictive like that.

Love what you did to those doctors. Only thing that would have made it better is to have thrown a public flogging in on top of it. But I already mentioned I'm vindictive, didn't I?
lindon2 chapter 1 . 4/6/2009
good fic
86 | « Prev Page 1 .. 3 4 5 6