|Reviews for Curse of the Triforce|
| Time's Quill chapter 45 . 10/8/2011
Wonderful! You're a very good author, and your work held me captive to the very end. I'm sad that it's over, though... your characters were very well done and well thought out, and each time someone died I felt that a piece of me died with them. I nearly cried when Koume and Kotake... well... you know. I'll never play Ocarina of Time the same way ever again. Thank you for writing this. Will you write more Legend of Zelda? I know you've written another LoZ story, but... will there ever be any more? Regardless, thank you for writing this masterpiece. This was actually the thing that showed me that FanFiction could be really good, as well as really bad. Thank you,
| Oracle in Vayne chapter 20 . 10/7/2011
This story is nothing short of epic. I started laughing in the middle of the library when I read the "Do you want to hear what I said again?" That was awesome.
| JadeOokami chapter 45 . 9/28/2011
Ah, the feeling of closure after the end of a long story.
I'm surprised this doesn't have more reviews and attention, though to be fair I did find it on a recommendation list. I don't tend to like stories with loads of original characters either, but I did like this one. There were some things I did not like so much... sometimes the plot devices did not seem woven together so much as put in a straight line. And of corse I'd prefer not to think our favorite hero was almost blackmailed or bribed into what might as well be servitude... but I suppose that is one answer as to why each hero is named Link and whatnot, haha. I have to wonder about the youngest prince (Kyrus, was it?). He was not amongst the survivors (Which were said to be ALL of them) and yet he's talked about as if he still lives. Whatever happened to him?
I do like how you tied a lot of the old things to the new ones we know, like how the Gerudo only ever having one man per one-hundred years (Which shouldn't be genetically possible, really, so the curse thing fits well), as well as the newer Hyrule town. I like that you played with the idea of power and how one can be corrupted by it, like with Darion. A couple of times that he and Malark lived admittedly felt like coincidences, or at least practically given out so that their obstacle doesn't get in their way again later (like with Mudora). I kind of like that you didn't give the triforce to this Link and Zelda, but at the same time kind of sad about it, haha. I think this Link seemed... certainly very mature, but somehow unlike what I imagined Link to be like, since each incarnation seems largely similar. I also thought the ending a little strange... that Rauru was the ONLY one to that that prediction seriously, in some way, even though you made it seem like it's believed by most that they aren't really correct. Also, that Link really did only seem useful by circumstance.
Anyways, really though, I did enjoy it! I think this is the only Zelda fic I've read that is so long (And complete!). You portrayed your original characters well. Especially Kokron and Anru in particular. (Forgive me if I get some of these names wrong). I enjoyed my time reading it. Good luck with any future story of yours!
| varr chapter 1 . 9/2/2011
this was wonderful. there are alot of inane things i'd like to comment on (no visit to the kokiri, the excessive use of the word recalcitrant, etc.) but what i really want to say is that you did a wonderful job of having the characters make believable choices. i would love to see you revise this story. just the occassional editing and expounding. lastly, arnu should have used the ocarina. could've solved everything... but then you'd have to cut 20 or so chapters.
| Kerian Halcyon chapter 45 . 2/14/2010
This is inarguably one of the most epic Legend of Zelda fanfics of all time...and thank Hyrule that it is complete too! Sure, it's a bit dark, but what's a good story without a bit of tragedy added into it?
I would have reviewed earlier (I really hate it myself when readers don't R&R), but I wanted at first to see how the story would work out before I reviewed, and then I just got so into it that I was incapable of reviewing it. Now that the story is over, I'll be free to state my opinions about it...
I always dreamed on making a prequel for the Legend of Zelda games...thanks for beating me to it. lol. Right away, I could recognize the different games that you based the whole story off of (Ocarina of Time, Twilight Princess, A Link to the Past, etc), and you even added your own original plot references without altering the future plot. Also, you made the story far enough back that you managed to explain everything so that, even if you left anything original behind, it would be able to fade away into time and speculation so that the original Zelda stuff could fall into place. All in all, this story is absolutely brilliant!
Personally though, there were a couple of things I think that you left out of the story that, personally, I think could have been added into the whole plot. For example; Kaepora's transformation into an owl. The fact that you didn't add that kind of left me hanging.
Save for a couple of spelling/grammar problems, this story is undeniably epic. If I were to give it a professional rating, a 9.5/10 would more than suffice.
Well, I guess that's enough ranting on a review...lol. Until next time, me out!
| Asgar chapter 45 . 2/12/2010
My apologies, but I forgot a "not" in my last review. Of course, you wrote Malark so that he didn't slip into stupid evil territorry, but was a believable and well-done villain. -_-
| Asgar chapter 45 . 2/12/2010
Wow, how could've thought that the Legend of Zelda series offers so much stuff for such a dark and edgy tale.
Well done storytelling and a good plot. I also like how you wrote Malark, keeping the evil aspects low enough to slip into downright stupid evil.
Quite the depressing story, though. At the end, I was actually happy that at least the Moblin King, of all people, was still alive. You really don't refrain from killing off characters, hm? What got me most were the death of Narala (I had actually hoped she'd make it through after surviving that incident at Zora's domain...) and the cruel fate of the Gerudo. Seeing all the likeable aspects about the two witches/thieves instantly vanish as a result of that wasn't nice either.
Actually, after all that's happened, Ganondorf appears like a friggin' saint by now. Too bad he never got his hands on the Triforce, he couldn't have made things much worse anyway. Gee, listen to me, cheering on the villain. I'd still wish somebody would just use that thing to reverse all that's happened. Should that be so hard, if things were to be kept peaceful? You don't have to wage a war to get all the three Triforce bearers together, even if the thing splits, no? That's what caused this mess to begin with, I believe, people being afraid to use the Triforce...
| Lord Drash chapter 45 . 11/30/2009
This was awesome. I'm just going to start off by saying that. You did a fantastic job of weaving an interesting and compelling story and I had a very hard time stopping. Still, there are a few complaints. For a story of this caliber I was surprised to see so many grammatical and spelling mistakes, and if it wasn't wonderfully written it would have put me off.
Also at times it seemed like events were barely going the way you wanted them, they seemed forced at times.
Potential, okay guaranteed spoilers ahead.
Like when Darion finally got the Triforce and was shot, healed himself, killed people, stabbed and healed himself again. It felt a bit more like you were forcing the situation to proceed the way you wanted it to, rather than allowing it to flow naturally, since it seemed unlikely, first that they would fail to kill Darion and then that he would allow himself to be threatened again.
There are other examples of this in story, some characters act slightly odd or events seem a little to lucky, but overall it was great and I loved the references to the other games. Good luck with your future writing.
| reihong chapter 45 . 8/27/2009
All I can say is...wow. Just, wow. I'll be honest-this is probably one of the best fan-fics I've read, if not THE best. I thoroughly enjoyed every bit of it-your writing style flows almost seamlessly, and your imagination and creativity are simply marvelous to behold. Your character designs were nothing short of amazing-I literally could not stop reading this for days!
There is so much in this story that I would love to comment on and praise, but seeing as it's almost 3:00AM...wait, actually, it IS 3:00 AM, I'll suffice with a heartfelt thank you. So, thank you so much for putting so much time and effort into this work! I will definitely recommend it to others!
Take care, and happy writing!
| ZeldaMoogle chapter 45 . 8/12/2009
Ok. 'Wow' doesn't even cover this. How to explain it, hmm...
Well first off, I loved your characters. Period. Screw the fact they were original-personally I like OCs myself, haha, and these were just... I can't find a word to name it. They were as varied as trees in a forest and deep as the Mariana Trench. *blinks* Ok, I'll try to stop with the metaphorical here, haha. ;
On that note-from the beginning you had us hooked, mostly with your characters but also in the subtle foreshadowing and connections to Ocarina I noted. Also Twilight Princess, I think-is the Arbiter's home the same Arbiter's Grounds as in Twilight Princess? It would made sense with the reanimated dragon skeleton you fight there... I especially liked how you explored Twinrova's back story, haha. Those were some of the best parts.
I'm really quite overwhelmed with the mastery of this tale. Though I would give it a once-over (or two) with spell check; lots of times I noticed some word confusion/typos, namely mixing up 'safe' with 'save' as in the context 'all save one'; then a few places where 'of' was 'or' or 'out', 'our'. Other than that, everything else was far above par; let's just say I envy and admire it at the same time, haha. And especially the last chapter was a tear-jerker-are you sadistic or what? lol j/k-though I did notice you weren't exactly adverse to killing off characters when necessary. I don't know whether to admire that or not, but I know I have trouble doing that...
Alright, I guess that's enough rambling! Lastly, let me say-I bow to your amazing authorness. People who disagree, let them be struck by lightning! ;
| Esper of Light chapter 45 . 8/3/2009
Sir, this is by far the best story I have read on this site. Considering the way of Zelda and how the characters are the same yet different in each installment, I think you can be given a pass for using mostly original characters. I love the Kaepora-Gaebora references to...well, himself. The fascination with owls and Link's remark to him sitting in a tree. I lol'd.
Kotake and Koume were excellently done, and in the end it was a shame to see them fall to evil when they had good in them. Of course, that was going to happen anyway, but that's beside the point.
I am hard pressed to call anything on this site a favorite story, but this one fits the bill. You write on a level that far surpasses my own. I can only hope to be able to put together a story so well myself one day. Good job.
| Browsing Critic chapter 45 . 8/2/2009
You have ended this story on a believable, wonderfully executed, and utterly appropriate note.
The characters in this story were fantastically written. They all had varied personalities and great depth.
The dark aspects in your story gave it a magnificent touch of realism and made it very relatable. Everything felt appropriate and reasonable as well; nothing was ridiculous or exaggerated.
Your pacing was also worthy of praise. None of your chapters were rushed and every chapter contributed something meaningful and significant.
Your story also felt like it was expertly segmented. It was as though numerous extraordinary tales came together for this story; the betrayal and death of King Artaxis, the splitting of the Triforce, the war for the Triforce, the campaign against Malark, and the origin of Hyrule's repeating history. The story transitioned very well.
Regarding your comments on Curse of the Triforce's connection to Twilight of the Goddesses, I felt like the connection was excellent, with the sinister nature of the Goddesses being heavily hinted at in this work and Twilight of the Goddesses confirming their sinister nature later on. Everything appears to be perfectly compatible, due to the fact that the populace is unaware of the Master Sword's true origin along with the fact that the Goddesses were presumably pretending to be benevolent in all of their appearances. Honestly, I find that Curse of the Triforce and Twilight of the Goddesses connect to each other perfectly.
Here are the only two writing errors that stood out to me:
- "Smiling maliciously at Link, he pushed himself past his minions clenched his other hand to a fist and raised his arm."
That sentence would flow better and be more understandable if, for example, you wrote:
"Smiling maliciously at Link, he pushed himself past his minions and raised his free hand while clenching it into a fist."
- "Most certainly not, Rauru thought as he watched, Ganondorf stomp through the portal, leaving the Sacred Realm."
You do not need a comma after watched and before Ganondorf.
Once again, Curse of the Triforce is an amazing, believable, deep, and relatable story. You are a great author Lord Syntax. Thank you very much for writing these wonderful stories. Curse of the Triforce and Twilight of the Goddesses are the best stories I have read on any website.
| MrChoco chapter 45 . 8/1/2009
Great story! But what was supposed to happen to the sleeping Zelda?
| Browsing Critic chapter 43 . 7/29/2009
I am impressed by how you introduced the Door of Time and the other seals on the Triforce. Early on in your story you hinted toward the Door of Time; however, the way you ultimately presented it was unpredictable. You have also given Rauru a good reason to make himself an eternal guardian of the Triforce. The mention of "Heroes yet to fall," is quite chilling, as it implies that Arnu is aware that, in the end, all of the measures that had just been taken would never truly improve Hyrule.
Another thing I have liked about Curse of the Triforce is Arnu's belief that happy endings don't exist. Her stance on that issue perfectly fits with both this tale and Twilight of the Goddesses. Once more, you have brought in a powerful touch of realism.
- Regarding this sentence:
"it was just one room of a large pyramid that some called 'Temple of Light', situated in the centre of the Sacred Realm, but none of them were going to leave it."
This sentence is rather awkward. You should have written "The Temple of Light," instead of just "Temple of Light." Also, the end of your sentence implies that nobody would leave the room they were in, which is obviously not the case. It may have been better if you wrote "But none of them would be stepping foot into the Sacred Realm itself," to make things more clear.
- Regarding this paragraph:
"It was only the second time in her life that Arnu traveled into the Sacred Realm – and, if she had anything to say about it, also the last time. The first time had been twenty years ago, during the horrible famine; and she had shared in the marvel back then. Now, she was merely feeling a distant fury at the Triforce and the ruin it had brought over Hyrule."
You do not need to say "Also the last time," at the end of the first sentence; you only need to write "the last time." You also do not need a semicolon after famine; a comma would be more appropriate. You do not need a comma after "Now" either. Finally, it might be better to say "The ruin it had brought upon Hyrule," instead of "The ruin it had brought over Hyrule."
- Erliss and Grangus trading icy looks for a second is a little awkward seeing as how Grangus is blind. However, since Grangus could have just scowled in the direction of Erliss' voice, it still arguably works.
- Finally, it would probably be more appropriate to say that the Sages chanted an incantation rather than a formula.
Curse of the Triforce and Twilight of the Goddesses are certainly the best Zelda stories on this website. I hope that your stories will continue to be great.
| Xunafein chapter 42 . 7/29/2009
I just finished reading twenty chapters of your story over.. I forget how long. A course of a day, maybe. But I must say, this story is nothing less than phenomenal. Everything just clicks into place so well. A detailed recount of the wars only barely mentioned in A Link to the Past, I can only assume. Though it's impossible to ignore the foreshadowing to the events of The Ocarina of Time.. but I digress. I await the final writings of this story with bated breath, and eagerly look forward to any other writings you choose to pen/ (or in this case type.)