Reviews for Escape from the Hokage's Hat
Guest chapter 19 . 7/18
Good concept but each chapter leaves me frustrated. Your chapters barely have any depth because you don't explain what's going on in enough detail before going to another scene. in the future, should you decide to pick up writing again finish a sequence or find better stopping points before moving to a different scene and add more detail. Ideally the best authors want to draw their readers in and have the scenes play out in their minds with their descriptive sentences and you've failed that by quite a large margin. It's still redeemable and I hope you do continue some day
dragonfox123 chapter 2 . 7/8
Awesome chapter
mckertis chapter 19 . 6/30
Some might call your storytelling "non-linear", while i would say it is "chaotic". Following one plot line, only minutes pass between excerpts, while for another line it's weeks ? Ridiculous.
mckertis chapter 5 . 6/29
Oh gods, he just cant shut up, can he ? He absolutely MUST write stupidly huge sheets of author's notes after every friggin chapter. Disgusting.
Flutters Is Shy chapter 43 . 6/15
Uhhh, quick question. Did you forget about Ebisu coming across the CMC - I mean, the Konohamaru trio? And also, you had a scene with the Kyuubi way back when stating that it would be trying to break free whenever Naruto was put through battle, but ever since that chapter you haven't so much as had a peep from the fox...
Guest chapter 43 . 5/24
Too much fighting filler and not enough 'training' time. Sounds like they were on an adventure and trained only in their spare time. Didn't seem like Naruto learned any useful jutsus. Too bad this story couldn't go on. Because the way I saw it, it was going downhill after the part where Tsunade invoked her Hokage status and ordered people around. Too many nonsensical characters were created or added in, so it got annoying and old real fast.
hamsterville chapter 26 . 5/17
A good story but way too many fillers
Ibskib chapter 16 . 5/16
that Kurenai - than Kurenai

people said about blonde's - people said about blondes

and head butt - and a head butt

was clinging to her curves slightly - was clinging to her curves
(superfluous, made the sentence feel clumsy)

more careful what he said - more careful about what he said

Each time that she tracked the projectiles - Each time tracking the projectiles (felt clumsy)

After a treatment - With the treatment
(she has already been healed)

had the minimal amount of decency - had the decency

mustn t - must not

large bolder - large boulder

you right arm - your right arm
Ibskib chapter 15 . 5/16
poison s - poisons

the basics of Tsunade's strength technique? (I don't believe that even Shizune knows the technique, so it really makes no sense to attempt teaching it to Hinata)

the bodies - the body's
Ibskib chapter 14 . 5/16

political ally's - political allies

his highnesses - His Highness'

one of subordinates - one of his subordinates
Ibskib chapter 13 . 5/15
the rulers - the ruler's

Straitening - Straightening

flicker of lighting - flicker of lightning

could seriously effect - could seriously affect

Smiling at child antics - Smiling at the child's antics
Ibskib chapter 13 . 5/15
Noticed the opposite gender problem here, where you used the 'male' form to describe Shizune

brunet - brunette (the former is for males, or if the gender is unspecified, the latter is for females)
Ibskib chapter 13 . 5/15
I've noticed this popping up a whole bunch of times, it keeps making me think that Naruto has transformed into a female :-)

blonde - blond (without the 'e' when describing males)
Ibskib chapter 12 . 5/15
Noticed two errors:

the demon brats place - the demon brat's place

blaitenly - blatantly
Boricuasbond chapter 40 . 4/15
40 chapters and still Narutos party arent home yet. You are streghting this story way to much. Ive enjoyed most of the chapters but really, theres just to much time between chapters and no real progress in Narutos Jutsus or new Jutsus.
2,923 | Page 1 2 3 4 11 .. Last Next »