Reviews for Twilight the Rewrite
Vamplover Tabby chapter 1 . 3/9
Oh my gosh! You actually made me like twilight! I've only read one chapter so far, but I can tell already I will enjoy it much more than the original! Bravo!
HT chapter 3 . 12/24/2014
I forgot to add that "ok" isn't the correct word to use. "Okay" would be much better. "Teleporter" is spelled wrong as well; there are not supposed to be two ls. It continues to be a boring read, but I still, somehow, have a little hope for it.
HT chapter 2 . 12/24/2014
There are a few grammatical errors in this. For one, you meant to say "definitely", not "defiantly". If you are going to try to use that word, make sure you use it correctly. You also forgot to capitalize Biology. Other than that, it seems to be okay. Quite boring, actually, but I thought that about the original Twilight series.
ClickyPen chapter 10 . 9/26/2014
See, this is a good story. It's interesting. It's suspenseful. The plot seems tight. The thing is, it's not even close to Twilight. I'm no big fan of Twilight, but the only things here that are the same are the small town, the school, Edward and Bella meeting, and the incident with the van. You didn't even use the powers that the vampires already had canonically as their dark gifts, when it would have made perfect sense.
Basically, it's not bad. But it doesn't read like a rewrite. It reads like you took the basic premise and decided, "screw this, I'll write something completely different."
Charis77 chapter 32 . 9/21/2014
If only Stephanie Meyer had consulted with you when she wrote her book! This was so much better than the original. The best changes: 1) Edward acting like a real person AND a teenager. I love how the vampires kept some of their age behaviors when they turned. 2) Bella's characterization as independent with a mind of her own. She doesn't need to whine all the time because she has the guts to handle stuff on her own. 3) The Cullens-To me this was the best change of all. Instead of them being sickly sweet, they actually give you a feeling of being a vampire family, i.e. they're overall nice but can be dangerous. The changes to Carlisle and Alice and Jasper were awesome! 4) Jacob versus Edward-You hit just the right tone for this. A bit of tension, but not overdone and ridiculous. 5) An actual plot for the nomads that runs throughout the story. 6) All the little changes that made the story more real-the Cullens' dark house, actual vampire lore, Bella having a boyfriend before Edward, Bella having real friends from school, Edward the only vampire at school for a good reason, a slow getting to know each other before falling for each other, etc. Well done!
jotweetyjo1 chapter 2 . 9/1/2014
Loved it
SabinaRose chapter 2 . 8/25/2014
Its not bad. The only problem I have is that you changed the characters apperances and personalites. Though being taller does give Bella a good excuse for being so clumsy (I know from experince). I like the way you write, its very easy to follow (which is a problem I had with the series). I am going to read more and give you reveiws every couple of chpaters. I know its been a long while since you wrote this, but I feel I need to express my opinon as a fan of The Twilight Saga. I wouldn't don't expect you to replybut if you do that would be greatly appreciated.
Rosa Blake chapter 7 . 8/25/2014
Ok so very typical, the cross? invitations in? not very unique.
Rosa Blake chapter 5 . 8/25/2014
again nice twist, little iffy on seeing where this going but im interested enough to keep reading
Rosa Blake chapter 2 . 8/25/2014
I love the idea of the thermos... nice twist
jeremychenevert399 chapter 1 . 8/22/2014
jess weres new chapter 33 . 6/13/2014
how do u find new moon
jess chapter 22 . 6/13/2014
weres new moon
Frost-Winds chapter 1 . 6/8/2014
Wow, this IS how the book SHOULD HAVE been written! You should be the rightful writer instead! Nice work!
Warrior Cat Cody chapter 6 . 6/4/2014
Bella's gotten sassy. I like sassiness in a character; it had different flavors of spices in one's life. And it'll look so weird to see Edward in a snowball fight. :)

And as for the nickname Arizona fits.

Keep up the great work!
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