|Reviews for That Look|
| Guest chapter 70 . 5h
Love it any way to buy a update?
Or sequel to contain my need to read more
| HisStory-Repeatz chapter 70 . 13h
Just read this for the second time. Forgot how much I enjoyed it the first time...
Thank you very much.
| hiding from lies chapter 70 . 11/28
MOAR! I loves it and the feels are so great. I need MOAR
| 11lorddc1 chapter 70 . 11/23
Was getting really into this story, and then i notice I'm already on the last chapter and it hasn't been updated in almost three years. :'( Congrats on your own books though!
| RagingKit chapter 4 . 10/20
best fanfic ever
| ShadowImageComics chapter 70 . 10/18
Interesting turn of events. I can not wait for the next chapter. You had me hooked to the point that I read it in two days. Keep up the good work.
| kabir0399 chapter 5 . 10/16
Thank you very much for the chapter this is awesome
| pocoorange chapter 40 . 10/12
In this chapter, the man/woman "I'VE FUCKED 100 MEN/WOMEN" thing is like how if a key opens up 100 locks, it's awesome, but if a lock is opened up to 100 keys, it's useless
| Drake666 chapter 70 . 10/12
Hola acavo de leerlo al igual k otras historias tuyas, abra continuacion? me gusta mucho y kedaria mal sin un final
| kingrobert84 chapter 70 . 10/4
doin awesome man whens update?
| Awkward Dork chapter 1 . 9/16
Hello there. I've read through all of this story except for the last two chapters and felt like I could no longer wait to review. I have a lot to say, especially after your long author's note on around chapter 57 or so? I want to respond to that and give this story and you some justice. That said, I don't want to come off as either unnecessarily angry/unfair or on the flip side effusive. I hope to give you some honest constructive criticism.
I have to say, seeing the great amount of reviews on this story, I sincerely expected more from it. This is not meant as an insult because I still appreciate it for what it is. Nonetheless though, I'll point out what I mean as I review chapters I find notable.
Looking over this first chapter, I have to commend you for the idea and what you sought to accomplish. It's an interesting idea for a story, and it does address a major "hmmm" and that is how basically everyone in the village treated Naruto as if he were the Nine-Tailed himself. No one tried to be kind to him, really, or looked beyond the surface. I appreciate this.
It sets up the story well, but I have to say, knowing what happens later on, it is again a bit disappointing. There seems to be this big discrepancy between how serious something is and your ability to really demonstrate that seriousness.
I don't mean always being depressing. The bits of humor in your story are pretty decent. I've had my share of laughs and I admire that because I personally don't really have a grasp for humor in writing.
That said, let's take Anko for example. She's had an extreme and traumatic experience with Orochimaru, and yet for the most part, her actions and speech never really show that. In fact, there were many times I questioned if you just left some things out from canon Naruto, only to have it show up later almost as an afterthought. It is given some detail, but definitely in comparison with everything else, it definitely feels like that. The only major time Anko and her past comes up is in relation to Naruto, and I'd say that's a great injustice done to her character and characterization.
What WAS there was definitely not bad, but your story as a whole seems to have a habit of losing sight of the greater picture in terms of character development. It feels very basic and straightforward, though the plot is one of this story's stronger points. Personally though, it's hard to read and enjoy a story if the characters are lacking. I pressed on because I was interested in the Naruto/Anko dynamic and how it played out, because I actually ended up adapting to your writing style and appreciating the strange paradox of both seriousness/silliness.
But reading this story as a means of emotional fulfillment? No, I don't think this really fits that bill. That's not to say there aren't enjoyable moments though, but I do at times wish that this story could be re-done with more mature development of characters, because in all honesty it can feel a bit sloppy and heavy-handed.
You do have a lot of reviews, favorites, follows, and no doubt hits. It is something to be proud of. But it is surprising to me how the majority of your chapters feel like they were posted "hot off the press" as FanFiction calls it. There are a lot of typos that I'm astonished that a basic word processor didn't pick up. Like, I've long ago "lost track" (not actually, but yeah) of how many times you've missed letters on the words "the" or mixed up the letters. It's clear from later chapters that you have a beta, too. How is this missed? It's really confusing if you ask me.
I feel like, just out of respect for your readers, you should pay more attention to simple things like this. You could say, well, it's not a big deal, and arguably it's not, but I feel like it's basic etiquette, so to speak, in writing.
I have to say that I almost stopped reading this story many times because of this and the heavy-handed characterization. But the direction you took the story, the twists, and the sweet and funny if somewhat "silly" dynamic between Naruto/Anko did keep me coming back. The characters you chose to kill off, and overall the butterfly effect from the changes Anko brought out in Naruto.
But yeah, I sincerely hope you take this to heart, because I truly feel like there is so much more you could do with your characters, while still maintaining the integrity of your writing.
On second thoughts, I might leave this as one of my only reviews, since it would be a little tedious to go back and point everything out. I hope you can understand the gist of what I'm saying.
So the final thing I hope to address here is how people treated you. I strongly disagree with what happened and believe these people were wrong to insult you that way. These stories are indeed written on your own time and at your own discretion, and people should respect that. I'm sorry to hear what happened. I think how you addressed it was appropriate for what happened, though that said, listing your stats in response to egotistical comments was a little off-putting. I tried to push away that bias though because it is genuinely an accomplishment to have so many well-received stories. But yeah. You are a decent writer, but IMHO, these stats don't necessarily give a perfect assessment of a writer. I mean, naturally... I hope it doesn't get to your head, because writing is a great thing, even through the difficult moments. Honing that inner voice is an art that I believe is meaningful. And ultimately, I do believe you have several areas where you could majorly improve in.
But you are a prolific writer, with good ideas and direction. So I do hope you take pride in that because that's not easy to get down either. I wish I could just flow and pour out all my writing, but I'm paralyzed by my own fear of inadequacy, thus ironically leading to it. Ugh. I'm trying to work on it.
Anyway, I wish you luck on whatever you choose to do in your future, and congratulate you on the success you have already had.
| Naru-chanKURAMA chapter 70 . 9/15
| Luccian chapter 70 . 9/9
I actually read Retribution of Heirs first...it was the Naruto/Anko seen that got me curious about the original fic...I'm glad I read this, even if it was days later, it's really good. Is this story still active? I mean, you left off with what will probably be the biggest plot-twist/cliffie in this entire fic...
On a side note, Orochimaru-Sensei to the rescue! (I'm surprised that Anko still calls him "Sensei"...but then again, Naruto still calls Anko "Sensei" despite all that has happened. The Orochimaru-Anko parallel is awesome btw, but it makes the fic so...angsty...)
Anyways, I'll Follow this story and hope it gets updated.
| uwishuwerecool chapter 70 . 9/9
| bangladesh3610 chapter 70 . 8/31
this story is not going to continue i assume?