Reviews for The Fall
Sarifina Filth chapter 3 . 2/13/2014
This is brilliant.
Positively brilliant in an almost poetic way. "I was created only to fall, and to be my brother's greatest tragedy". It's a very deep concept. Very unique to this fanfiction. And the knowledge of these 'Falls' has instilled in him a maturity and a sense of the the all-knowing resignation that is characteristic of dream-seers.
Though you take two very different writing styles in the Prologue and in the following chapters, it pleases me to see that you keep the almost elegiac approach to both accounts, the descriptive and profound nature of the content of later chapters keeping what the more simplistic style of writing threatened to lose. The idea of the book, the pictures of the thousand lives, thousand Falls, and thousand Shatterings is a heavy one indeed.
The way Fai knows Kurogane, not the shallow person one would meet but the very nature of him, is a fascinating concept, and a delight to read. Though surely he would've had a better response to Kurogane and his actions, having known him so well?
Either way, this sort of insightful work is refreshing to read, and I'm so pleased to have stumbled upon it. Though years have passed since your last update, I shall watch you in hopes that some day you will take up the proverbial pen once more and again add to this piece.
GentleMidnightSnow chapter 3 . 8/13/2009
OMG, I LOVE THIS! I've always thought that it would appropriate for most versions of Fai. It's like Fai is a Dimension Mage!
BeccaBear93 chapter 3 . 8/3/2009
I love it so far! My favorite part was the prologue. It was written in a really interesting way, and I liked seeing the glimpses into the lives of the other Fai (although Life of Fai(The Fall)-3 was really confusing, and I couldn't tell which "me" was which). I also really liked how hilariously straightforward Fai was in the newest chapter.

Can't wait to see what happens next!

applepielover chapter 3 . 7/26/2009
Very good imagery in this chapter - vivid description. The stalking wasn't creepy and I find it amusing during the part when Kurogane catches Fai stalking him.

In the second chapter, there were a few errors I spotted, but I assume your beta will take care of it.

I actually like the part with Fai, his brother, and about the plant.

Overall, this is not a bad chapter. A little confusing and it could help to add in some more necessary details about the school Kurogane goes to and how did Fai know (unless you're saving it for the next chapter or later.) This is well written nonetheless. :-)
Tuliharja chapter 3 . 7/23/2009
Wow, you really showed something new about Fai...Even though, there never had what kind of person he would be. I think I understand pretty well; Fai just showed up as a creep. And who can blame him? If the other one is stalking other and then talking all mumbo-jumbo, I probably would call nearest hospital or punch that person...(Hard.)

My, my! What Fai is looking for? Does he try to prove he is actually live or what? Or is he just silly? Hm, it almost seems like he doesn't know his role in this fic...
inafrozenworld chapter 3 . 7/20/2009
I was trying to toss a coin between late night review and morning review and I've decided to spare you my morning brain... Funny how we seemed to post at about the same time... I need to put you on author alert. In fact *clicks box*

So you say you're worried about the quality of this chapter. Please don't be ) In fact I'd confidently say that this is the most well-written one out of the three you've posted so far. I really liked the decription, it seemed very rich and expressive without being ott or pointless. There are lots of lovely metaphors and images in this chapter as well, little details and facts that seem to liven the action and the characters up and give the story a sense of dynamism and realism. And Fai's strange little mental process... like he's constantly living in a daydream... I almost feel sorry for him going up against Kurogane, he seems very sweet!

The only thing I can say against it is that you describe a lot of what's going on but the reader isn't told very much about why. For example how did Fai find out where Kurogane went to school and does he go to private school? And that isn't a huge problem exactly but it's the third chapter and there's not been much said about what's happening. It didn't mean it wasn't alright to understand or enjoyable because it was very lovely to read and I like how some things (like Kurogane's shady dealings) are left in the dark but I'm definitely looking forward to seeing how these first three chapters are going to come together )
Kesa Ange chapter 1 . 7/2/2009
This prologue has to be one of the best bits of writing I've seen, and there's a lot of good ideas floating around in it (as I know you've already heard from me, heh). I love your writing style, and I can't wait to see how the rest of this story turns out.
inafrozenworld chapter 2 . 5/14/2009
So if this is a pre-chapter, what's the full chapter going to be? An extended version of this? Sorry, just curious.

And aha! Someone else has seen that picture! I found it as someone's wallpaper on LJ and ended up drooling over it for five minutes, wishing it was my wallpaper, disbelieving it was Clamp art rather than fanart (well they're not usually that forward, right?), deciding it was indeed official art and then wondering why I'd never seen this amazing picture before. I didn't think Fye was crossdressing though, but I'm jealous of the earring XD

Back to the fanfiction!

I'm really taken with this idea and I really enjoy and admire clever stories D Although I'll admit whatever Fai was doing at the beginning and the story thing only clicked at the end so I ended up reading over it again feeling silly, thinking 'Ah!' And now I'm wondering whether there's a Kurogane for this Yuui floating about )

Back to the review!

I think you've got two very likeable brothers with lots of interesting dynamics and perks (vegetarian... why does that work so ridiculously well?) They're both very faithful to their originals albeit slightly different due to age and it's going to be nice reading what happens to them. I'll probably end up getting stuck to this Fai ) There’s something about the atmosphere though and I don’t know what it is, it’s clearly comfortable but I know you’ve handled this better before *cheers Wallpaper on* looking forward to seeing what happens ‘tomorrow’

Ps. I really don’t know whether I can sympathise with Yuui or not because it sounds really cocky but I’m a little like that with plants. It’s more cacti with me though. Whenever I’m in a garden shop and there are cacti it gets a bit difficult, especially if I see a tiny, cute one, I just have to take it home and love it D Yuui is definitely different but still /Plant-love!/
Fai'swingedchronicles chapter 2 . 5/13/2009
Cool story I like it.

I think the pic your talking about was made by a fan. Or at least I think it is. I saw a similar one but Kurogane wasn't hugging Fai. I figured someone moved them around beacuse Ive seen other pics where people moved them around. I don't know though.
hadbeenworking chapter 2 . 5/13/2009
Okay now, this is getting interesting. I think I like this Fai very much - I like the way he thinks and sounds, rounded up and focused and /knowing/ Actually, I'm quite eager to see what he's going to do, what's going to happen. My interest is piqued

And I like the detail of the scene, from the droplets in the drawing to Dory to the voices of each twin resounding in different rooms - it was well built up, I think, rising and growing in tension (or better yet, action... smth...), fading in on the drawing and then Yuui's voice, fading out on the same.

So basically, I'm looking forward to more :)
Tuliharja chapter 2 . 5/13/2009
The begging was somewhat odd, but after that it was okay. Hee! It's nice thought you've made Fai as a somekind seer or person like that. It's interesting to see how he reacts about this all 'information' what he gets. Are you making him fall for Kurogane? It sounds like that. Anyway, I was sort of disgusted when you made Yuui as a plant-lover. (Don't ask why. It must be those weird plants what he bought, like Fai pointed out.) Will there appear other Tsubasa charecters in different roles? I've a feeling that so called 'tomorrow' will change everything...Really promising.

Ne, that picture what you mentioned, let me guess, did you find it for charecter guide or sort of?
pockysnightmare chapter 2 . 5/12/2009
"One other little thing- the last picture I mentioned exists in canon. CLAMP made a pic of Kurogane with his arm slung over a crossdressing Fai’s shoulders, smiling and looking off at something else with Fai just generally looking happy and content."

Where can I find this picture? And are you sure it isn't photoshopped cause some people are AMAZING at phtoshop..

Anywho, I cracked up SO hard at the "you stole my blood" part. Vampire~.

I love how you have Yuui write down the story of TRC. So cute~! So, I'm guessing in the real chapter Kuro is properly introduced?

I am curious! Please update soon!
Tofu-Master chapter 1 . 5/4/2009

Well, first off, I believe ya really got somethin' interestin' goin' on here. While I admit the style was a little hard ta understand at first, it proved ta be real effective once I caught the hang of it. I really like where yer goin' with this. The idea is unique, an' it captured my interests immediately.

Secondly, as a response ta the PM ya sent me, I would be more than honored - an' quite glad, as well - ta help with the betain' of this story.

An' as an answer ta yer other question, yes, I know 'bout the whole Yuui/Fai thing. I'm (thankfully) completely up ta date with the manga chapters, worries there, dear.

An' 'bout those shirts ya mentioned? Never seen one of 'em. I really, really want one. D:

Oh yeah...sorry 'bout the slang, here. This is jus' how I type/talk when I ain't writin'/editin', or shit like tha'. Sorry...
Anali-dreams chapter 1 . 5/3/2009
Ahh! Write more, quickly! That was amazing! It was a little confusing, but I think I figured it all out. At least, what goes with what. But I want to know what happens next! Please update soon!
Tuliharja chapter 1 . 5/3/2009
I'm sort of confused, Fai kept repeating The Fall. What's excatly? It's verb or what? I'm sort of confused because I'm not sure if it has verb meaning or not. This first chapter (prologue) was sort of like dream or it sounded like Fai was telling it with really strong drugs. Don't take that wrong -it was actually really interesting way told. (I'm trying to find enough good explaining to describe it. It sounded like Fai had been staring something blankly and told this.)

Sort of it was weird to heard the teller of this story would be older than his alernative selves. Yes, it sounded pretty sad and depressive he died every version, even I don't believe that it would happen in every version. (It would be like that.)

The ending sounded like...'deadly promise'. I'm interest to see what kind of setting the 'real' story will be in it and how Fai will act.
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