Reviews for Wasn't God After All
Sentio Infermum chapter 1 . 5/26/2013
That was awesome.

Seriously, it was awesome. The raw emotion that was captured here was astounding; it was depressing and scary and heartwarming all at once, and I like to believe this is how it went when Light died. The concept of actually dying is something I feel gets left out all too often in stories; people never seem to talk about what it is to have the life leave your body, to feel yourself slipping into nonexistance. It's always sugarcoated in moving-toward-the-light, my-last-wishes, surrounded-by-angels or tugged-at-by-demons nonsense... This, on the other hand, is real. It feels so much more genuine and powerful than any of that, because this is exactly what it claims to be: a person dying. I hope someday I can write death the way you just did. Well done.
IdOnTwAnTyOuToSeEmEcRy chapter 1 . 6/18/2009
I liked the way it showed Light it was good
MiloVentimigliaIsLove chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
What I've noticed a lot about your writing is this glowing intensity and connection that you have with your characters, like you know them better than you do yourself, which is an amazing can't-learn-it talent.

I could feel Light dying in this scene, emotionally, mentally, and physically. It really made my heart ache for him, even though as a person I cannot stand Light Yagami.

Again, you've made a nice twist that most authors shy away from by taking Light's dying persona and taking away his ego, something I believe is utter canon.

Thanks for this.
SerialKisserSylar chapter 1 . 5/10/2009




But aside that all, I felt like I could really feel the connection between the characters and Light's pain and all that! This is brill, btw

I’m sorry, L Lawliet.

One simply line says so much! D
hermionegranger47393 chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
Aw ;_;

this made me want to cry D:

It's sad. But amazing too, by the by 8D
PeterPetrelliIsMyHero chapter 1 . 5/9/2009


I loved it to BITS, and the light L/Light made it better too
Mayahyena chapter 1 . 5/4/2009
This was an amazing, well-written story. Your use of repetition was very effective. The detail really enhanced the quality of it. Most of these introvertive-before-Light-dies stories portray Light as holding on to the belief that he was God all the way through, so it's nice to see something different. I only noticed one thing that might be done to improve the quality.

"He couldn’t expurgate the etiolated messes out of his life; they weren’t ephemeral."

-This is a great sentence, very elevated. But, maybe a tad too elevated. Being honest, I'm not sure what it means. Your job as the writer is to communicate with the reader, not to make them go, "Huh?" It's great to enhance your paper with high-quality words, but three in one sentence is a bit much. Just a suggestion, though.

There were also a few typos and left-out words, but it's still fabulous. I really enjoyed reading this. Great job! You're a talented writer!