|Reviews for Unknown|
| KatiechanXoxoXSesshoukun chapter 1 . 7/23/2009
This first chapter was awesome.I can not wait till I read the next chapter.I am a hge Law & Order : SVU fan.I love watching it.
| InstantGratification chapter 12 . 7/20/2009
KATHY? No way. BITCH.
I loved this story. Seriously i did.
The end was enough to bring me to tears. You have a gift - a talent. And you describe everything so well.
Continue writing, girl. I'd love to read more of your work for years to come. :)
| Stacymc2012 chapter 12 . 7/6/2009
Oh goodness! I have to say so much in this review! *mutters to self* I knew I should've reviewed in every chapter! But anyway!
First of all, I must commend and applaud you for such a beautifully and well written story! Most of your grammar was up to point, one thing though, and it might just me being picky, sorry! Umm... When a character says something, like in dialogue, after he or she is finished, you start a new paragraph, for example:
""That's okay, you guys don't have to -" Elliot began, but Casey cut him off.
"She's our friend too Elliot." she said touching his shoulder affectionately.
"We want to be here when Olivia wakes up." She smiled at him in a sisterly manner.
Then Elliot smiled as he watched Casey step back and Fin put his arm around her. "Are you two a couple now?" he asked them.
"Hey, that's our business." Fin said with a smirk."
See? Plus, it'll make your chapters look a bit longer... ;] heheh!
As for the length of the chapters, I have one thing to say: "It's not quantity, but quality that counts." Don't ask me who I'm quoting, cause I have no idea, my best guess would be Lilo from Lilo & Stitch. LOL! ANYWAY! What I mean is that it's better to have chapters that are short and sweet than those excruciatingly LONG chapters that feel like they have no end and after a moment they become pointless because the author might've gone away on a wild tirade. So, as for length, it was great as well.
Your spelling: perfect! I found absolutely NO problem with it.
Your plot: WOW! I must say it was... Wow! Like I have NEVER cried that hard for that long in chapter 11 and 12! Also, something else that I feel the need to praise you about, is the way you developed the plot in a short 12 chapter story. And it's not only that, it's the fact that, there's just something about the way you did it. For example, some would think that to be able to develop it like this, you'd need to jump RIGHT into action, and sure, you could've stretched it out a bit, and slowed down, but it's okay! What I am trying to say is that you didn't jump right into action! You waited till chapter 3 to begin. In chapters 1 and 2, I like that you took the time to show Olivia's feeling for Elliot, and how strong they were... I like how you made her a round and dynamic character!
You have potential Sara. My goodness, you have so much potential! Just needs a bit of twiking up here and there, but that's fine, because all of us as writers ALWAYS have space for more improvement! Even I do! I can't begin to tell you all that is wrong with my writing! lol! But that's beside the point.
My point is, and it took me a nearly God knows how many words to get to it, THIS WAS FREAKIN' FANTASTIC! Yes, in summary to this LONG review are those four words! lol!
Great job on this hon! It was great! ;]
| TheTrekkieGirl chapter 1 . 6/16/2009
| Carriex3 chapter 1 . 6/10/2009
i love my story!
| Raychel chapter 10 . 6/1/2009
Eomg... I've read this before... I was wondering where this story went, I'm not even kidding!
| Raychel chapter 5 . 6/1/2009
ulcer... hah. I wonder why she doesn't REALLY have one on the show...
| Raychel chapter 4 . 6/1/2009
what? Oh... next chapter... heh...
| Raychel chapter 2 . 6/1/2009
This chapter actually made me go "Aw." lol. I love it so far!
| NoLove-wo-EO chapter 12 . 5/15/2009
I loved it! I was so shocked last chapter i read it while i was working and i almost dropped my phone.
| edge15684 chapter 12 . 5/15/2009
the ending was sweet
| svusvu chapter 12 . 5/15/2009
They love each other!
All it took was his voice for her to wake.
Sort of like he was here princw charming.
| PaceyW'sgirl chapter 12 . 5/15/2009
well i am glad that you wrote the last chaptere with a happy ending. I am looking forward to reading the sequel to this story whenever you have time to write one and post it! again great ending to this story!
| TheGoddessPixie chapter 11 . 5/15/2009
If Olivia dies, I don't CARE what happens next. Honestly. If Elliot and Olivia can't be together and live happily ever after, then I don't care anymore.
Not a flame, just sharing my feelings.
| PaceyW'sgirl chapter 11 . 5/14/2009
love to read more on this story! I hope that olivia will be ok and that you will not let her die! again love to read more when you can update again!