Reviews for Obsession
Civilized Monster chapter 1 . 9/5/2012
Oh man, you should definitely continue this! It isn't poorly written at all!
I love your attention to the details, the lighting and shadows, the way he notices her body and behavior. The jokes were spot-on in the humor!
There were some sentences which could be worded differently, such as "You gave me a scare!" which did indeed, make her sound like a grandma; perhaps she could have said "You scared me!" It would have made a smoother transition between her exclamation and the retort that follows after.
I really /do/ hope that you continue this. It's great and the story has me on the edge of my seat. It's very interesting so far! It would be such a shame if it was scrapped! So much potential!
an-ocean-in-the-sky chapter 1 . 10/30/2009
I'd really love to see this continued. The details and imagery are so rich and vivid. I hope you will consider finishing it.
blueheronz chapter 1 . 10/18/2009
Plot is overrated. Forget about the plot and concentrate on what you do so well: quiet, truthful, canon moments between the characters. Shiny slivers of descriptive brilliance. Beautifully constructed sentences that make me do a happy dance in the shadow of the dark little world you've created.

I put down my Camus long enough to read this. Just start writing and see where it takes you.

By the way, your stuff is enough to get me reading FF again. I've never read much of it - too busy writing original fic and some House/Cameron stories. But when I find writers of this calibre, it makes it worthwhile to be a wee bit fannish.
Marie del a Meer chapter 1 . 5/22/2009
Hi,

I don't think it's poorly written at all. I like the way you write, and your descriptions are original (that's a big complement). It's in character and I'm quite intrigued, please keep going...

Marie del a Meer
catgrl chapter 1 . 5/13/2009
I like it. I'm thinking you should write chapter 2.. The

beginning was very interesting...
please unsubcribe me chapter 1 . 5/11/2009
A lot of promise in this one...Plenty of potential threads...

I do love a puzzle and this fic is worth continuing, I reckon.
sheisbeautiful-sheisnotme chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
Dear Madam,

I read your bio and saw you write for both House and X-Men: Evolution.

That made me happy.

I saw you're 20.

That made me happy. (The closer I get to 20, the more I forget it's not that old.)

I read your bio, it made me smile.

That made me happy.

Then I read your story.

Don't you dare stop writing. It's funny and has good detail and your version of House and the other characters are great. And it's only been one chapter.

In short, if you stop writing, I will be sad.

I will not be happy.

Yours in writing,

Olivia.

P.S.- I hope I didn't come off as creepy. I swear, I'm not some fat 40-something truck driver with a penchant for young fanfiction authors.
arrrgylepirate chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
i kinda like it. Please don't scrap it! i'd really like to see where you are going with it.
Peesly chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
Please do not stop this fanfic. I quite like it, its pretty interesting really. So do continue, and I don't think its poorly writtin at all.

A lot better than what I can do thats for sure. :)
KristenJ350 chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
Brilliant! Please continue!
0melting.snow0 chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
'Tonight your name is Cameron'

I knew it! ) Perfect. Please update soon.
BunchofGrapes chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
I don't analyse the stories I read - I just go with my gut feeling about whether they interest and engage me - and if I want to find out 'what happens next'. So, I don't think it's poorly written - quite the opposite - the characters sounded 'right'; the conversation between House and Wilson was crisp and witty, and the descriptions were perfect. It was intriguing and I would enjoy reading more, but if you're going to abandon this - then do it now, rather than disappoint people further into the story. The one thing I can't stand is when authors threaten to withhold chapters if they're not showered with positive reviews. you should write for your own pleasure, and if that's not happening then stop. (But I hope you don't!)
Kshar chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
I like this. I like the kind of staccato thing you have going on (you say choppy, I say potato...). I think it works very well in terms of these characters' voices: it reminds me of the show, in that House bounces from one topic to the other without notice. I also think you write Wilson very well-I love his dialogue with House here.

I loved "lit the room faintly blonde"-you turn a good phrase and I really enjoy the fact that your writing is beautiful but not overly descriptive (because I have a short attention span. Wait, that sounds less like a compliment. Because it's awesome! Yeah, that's right).

Also, in a tangent completely unrelated to the writing ;), I love Cameron's glasses more than it's probably healthy for a person to love a fictional character's possessions. So yay for the glasses! With a grandma chain!
Follow-ur-Shadow chapter 1 . 5/10/2009
I think it's written really well! And I hope you continue! But at the same time I know how hard it is to write something you can't get into :( Maybe a new chapter will inspire you!
lucindadixon chapter 1 . 5/9/2009
I'm interested. Hope you continue.
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