|Reviews for The Lay of a Broken Winged Sparrow|
| Fire'CxO'Ice chapter 24 . 11/29/2013
Holy smokes, Raum is the White Dragon?! Okay, slow down, I need a second to absorb this. Why did he fake his death? And why keep it from Jaya, of all people? I'm getting a really negative vibe about him.. Especially because of Jareth's attitude toward him. Reading the vignettes from your companion to this, I get the impression that he's thirsting for revenge, but he doesn't spare a thought for Jaya at all! Oh, another question. How did Avarron die? Did Raum kill him to take the throne? Or did he Fade or something? Hm. Ponder, ponder.
Okay, putting Raum aside for now. I'm so happy that Oros and Jaya are finally back in Sanctum! For once they get a moment of peace, after all this craziness. I'm a little worried about what they're coming back too, though. Terekai, I'm sure, isn't faring too well, plus poor Kit is probably still recovering from her little adventure. And oooooooooh you're so evil, letting Jareth whisper something to Oros that obviously has to do with Jaya, but not telling us what it was! I'm interested to see how their relationship is affected, now that they aren't running for their lives. Plus, we know both from the slight hints you've been giving us here and in that steamy second chapter of Mending that Oros obviously has strong feelings for her, whether or not he's able to acknowledge and accept them. Can't wait for more of their banter!
It's been awhile since you've updated, I hope all is well and that life is keeping you busy in a good way! As always, I am anxiously awaiting the next piece of this story.
| seinka chapter 24 . 10/3/2013
It is very difficult to find proper words to describe and review this story. It is so full of impressions and emotions and it's almost believable this could happen. Somewhere. :)
Though the descriptions are sometimes too detailed that I'm losing focus.
I love the Furiae. I don't remember since which chapter I started to like them, but they are incredible bunch of nice people. And the names you use are really great. Terekai Nameless, Nico the Butcher, Kiert Fireheart... all of these are burned into my memory and sometimes I catch myself repeating those names in my memory just because I love their sound. :)
Oh, and my favourite part was the dialogue between Jaya and Terekai. It's been few days since I've read it, but I think I cried. Is he really what she think he is?
| Athina.na chapter 24 . 7/30/2013
I love you. You have no idea how much this story has brightened my day.
And you know what? I was downright convinced that Jareth was the Dragon for some reason but wasn't entirely sure. And then you decide to throw us a bomb in the form of Raum. Say, is he the descendant of Mishuvel? Since wings are inherited and such.
Oh well, I hope the reunion scene is full of fluff and tears. And aren't Jaya's wings a nice twist? It will be a little to hard to explain the wings of an Asmodian on an Elyos. I look forward to seeing how things will work out on that acount.
| OhYesPlease chapter 24 . 7/8/2013
Oh my. This is fabulous! I have been riveted to my chair for the last few hours and I have absolutely no desire to drag myself from this story. But, alas, there are no more chapters (yet) to consume!
I do hope you plan on updating soon. To say this has been most enjoyable would be an understatement. It would be a crime to let this story go unfinished.
Also, I was in the same boat after the Avengers. It swallowed my life. I AM SO UNBELIEVABLY EXCITED for Thor: The Dark World.
THANK YOU for writing this. You are beyond talented!
| Quna chapter 5 . 7/7/2013
I have a feeling that my pm got lost somewhere in your spam filter again, so I'm leaving this as a comment. Here's certain something I've made for(?) The Lay and I'd really like to "show" you: youtube watch?vToJ6ZvNZKjc The explanation is in the description, remove the spaces please :)
Aaaand about that pm...
| TalosX10 chapter 1 . 6/19/2013
Just curious if there are gonna be any more chapters to this story? I've really enjoyed it so far and would love to see more of it.
| NikitaDarkstar chapter 24 . 6/14/2013
So, I can't believe I finally got to the end of this, especially since I first tumbled over it when there was only 4-5 chapters to it.
And all 24 chapters have been a pure joy to read, some of the earlier ones had a bit of a repetition issue, but later on that disappeared (considering how long you've been working on this that's no surprise at all. :)), and your descriptions and characterization have been amazing. And I have to say, it's rare for me to find a fanfiction that forces me to use a dictionary every once in a while to look up a word, and do it without annoying me, so great job there.
And of course, I just have to ask, will there be more chapters to The Lay? Or is this the proper, intended end of it? I'm mainly asking because I've quite fallen in love with the story, and Jaya's and Oros odd relationship. :)
| MystiFay chapter 1 . 6/3/2013
I don't really know how to start with this review since there's so much I would like to say, but I can't really find the words. Yes, your story has blown me away, I was hardly able to stop reading... It is needless to say that you story is by far the best of all the Aion fanfictions, but more than that, it certainly is one of the best I've ever read. And I've been around for a while ;)
Since I've been playing Aion for only one or two weeks by now, I'm not that familiar with the game and its story yet, so it's a little hard to tell how many of the characters and how much of the legends stem from within the game and what has been created by your imagination. However it is, you are one hell of a writer and I'm so intrigued and fascinated by your story that, after I finished reading, I was lost in thought all day, reliving the story and wondering how it might continue.
One of the reasons why your story has captured me this way, I guess, is because of Oros and Jaya. Their story resembles that of the two main characters of my favourite books so much that it took me right back into the time when I first read those books and first fell in love with those characters. There are just so many similarities - the fantasy setting,the two characters being cast out/left behind in their enemies' land, one strong and experienced male, one relatively unexperienced female (who has had the choice to go back but refused to leave him); now they have to survive and find their way back. And then everything about their relationship: starting out as enemies, with mutual hate and distrust, him being of higher status than her, cold and aloof, But something changed between them, after he becomes ther mentor, and especially during their 'trip', they grow much closer. Yes, Akkarin and Sonea (that's their names) have a lot in common with Oros and Jaya, I think, and that's why I had secretly hoped the latter would kiss at some point during their journey, just like Akkarin and Sonea did.
I don't know why I just wrote an essay about some other books when I should be talking about your story, but this isn't criticism, it is praise. The highest that i can give, because the part that describes Sonea and Akkarin's journey through their enemies' country - it is my favourite part of my favourite book from my favourite trilogy. I just LOVE it.
And now, I have to beg you to continue this story, because I can't stand not knowing how it ends. Seeing as the last update was one year ago, I am anxious about whether you will continue at all, but it wouldn't be fair - not to the readers, not to the story, not to yourself - to stop not.
So all I can do is hope you'll read this review someday and feel at least a little more motivated to update.
Well, this has to be the longest and cheesiest review I've ever written, so you are free to feel annoyed or honoured or both, and I will be off, playing Aion. Faith and arms!
| Karano chapter 24 . 4/16/2013
I think I've read this twice already. What do you want more? From your writing style, I can see you're a good writter, so you already know how nice this whole story sounds. But, PLEASE, in the name of Aion and Lady Ariel, please, I beg you, update already! It's not like we can read another Aion story while we wait for the next update, because your story is the longest and the only story that I can read with actual joy, not by stressing my mind about "what this word/sentence/ part/etc means". So please, in the name of Fregion, Maslametida, Tiamat, and for the love of both the Elyos and the Asmodians, PLEASE UPDATE.
| Wolf-Pup31 chapter 24 . 3/29/2013
This is really good, please update soon, i comand it of you! ;3
| Quna chapter 24 . 3/15/2013
Argh, I tried to be patient, but I really miss reading this. I know you're busy, but just so you know, I'm still waiting holding my breath (yeah, despite all the criticism I unleashed the last time I poster a review). I hope you post a new chapter soon. QQ
| Hunny chapter 24 . 3/14/2013
Holy god, people, start reviewing! How do u think she'll post another chapter if you don't review? Anyway. Sorry for reviewing only the 2nd time I read this. I observed that you don't have mistakes (there are a few spelling mistakes, but I barely noticed them). And, well, what am I supposed to say? The cliffhangers are nice, and the plot is solid, so yeah, nothing to complain here. Well done, and I wanna read more :D
| Karano chapter 18 . 2/26/2013
Look, I don't wanna be mean or something, but I didn't get it. Trist and Kiert are gay? No offence intended, I'm just confused.
| Nessya chapter 24 . 1/23/2013
Damn, I just finished reading all chapter in a row and now I've come to the end. You have to continue the story!
| Eleneri chapter 24 . 12/17/2012
There exist, in the world of fanfiction, a scant handful of stories which are flawless, glorious creations. This is one of them. Thank you for sharing your art, because that is what this is. Literary brushstrokes in a master craftsman's hand. I've never played Aion, and now I don't want to, simply because the world in the game could never compare to the eloquent, breathing richness you've put on the page. Bravo.