Reviews for Two Brothers and a Pop Tart
darck ben chapter 29 . 6/18/2014
good story
Autistic Writer chapter 5 . 7/6/2013
I kinda like this story :)
Keep up the good work
Padfootkicksbutt chapter 29 . 9/17/2012
awesome ending and tying everything up!
NinjaRawrSG chapter 29 . 5/28/2012
I loved the story and all but there wasn't enough humor for me to make it one of the very best stories I've ever read. Both shows are centered around humor, with London's naive nature and Zack and Cody's arguementive bromancin', In my opinion you didn't show enough of it making them seem a bit OOC. But this is just my opinion and I respect that this is your story and everything. I came on way to strong didn't I? :P
James888 chapter 29 . 10/8/2011
This was a nice longggggg story. I like how you ended it with everyone happy and in a reaationship except Robbie.

I also like how Hannah ans Mikayla publicaly said they

were friends no mater what the cost. That doesn't happen

to often :) I did'nt see to much of Maddie in this thought :(

Anway good story all round !
BEASTXxWOLF chapter 20 . 1/26/2011
Can you continue this story it so awesome
Alice chapter 10 . 10/30/2010
I absoutly LOVE Cody. He's so sweet and kind. And I am okay oath anyone he chooses to be with asokg as they appreciate him. I k ow I'm soyndin like an insane person because I am talking like he is really but still
Alice chapter 10 . 10/30/2010
I absoutly LOVE Cody. He's so sweet and kind. And I am okay oath anyone he chooses to be with asokg as they appreciate him. I k ow I'm soyndin like an insane person because I am talking like he is really but still
cocoalover1956 chapter 2 . 10/10/2010
I had always hated Mikayla, ever since I first saw her on Hannah Montana. But now I see that there are two sides to every story. I guess she was only so mean and competative because she felt that if she wasn't the best, her parents wouldn't love her anymore-heck, they probably even told her that to her face.
WyldCard4 chapter 29 . 7/30/2010
Honestly I don't think Miley would share her secret with this crew, no matter how touching the feud ending was. This is her life, if even one of them reveals anything by mistake...

Still a nice way of ending that part of the saga.

Is it horribly wrong that I wanted the Cikayla scene to end with Cody telling Mikayla it wasn't her and leaving her in the dust?

Yes, it is horribly wrong, but I am a horribly wrong person. I think a 17 year old boy who has seen every episode of Hannah Montana, iCarly, Wizards of Waverly Place, The Suite Life on Deck, Suite Life of Zack and Cody, and is currently burning through Sonny with a Chance should have tipped you off on that.

OK, you're just BAD. Selena and Miley playing enemies who kiss? That would just be cool. I wonder if Zack Martin's prize was kept secret from Mikayla as well.

Now, onto an overall review.

My biggest criticism would be the brief narration descriptions that show up a lot early on. Show don't tell is my gospel, and a scene where we are just told what is happening always annoys me. It doesn't matter who the author is, it annoys me if it is in someone's first fanfic or a published novel by a favorite author, I don't like it.

Now, I am applying this specifically to characters here. Simply being told how characters are developing or interacting always puts my teeth on edge. I find it much more interesting to be shown how they are growing and changing in how they treat each other or describe themselves.

My second and lesser criticism is that I just didn't find Mikayla that interesting. She was certainly sympathetic, and I liked bits and pieces of her, but I just didn't really find her compelling. She seemed to be too much of a force to make changes to the story and less of a contributing person. Part of the reason I was spinning ideas of Mikayla being an evil vamp out to seduce Cody comes from that.

My third and final overall criticism is that the humor was not dense enough for my tastes. This is not that the jokes weren't funny, anyone who nailed London or Zack's personality needs to understand humor, but there just wasn't enough of it for me, it didn't take up enough of the story. For me it's like Miley and her schemes. A fanfic for a comedy doesn't quite feel the same if the jokes aren't as common.

Note that the first is the only one that really matters, and that was largely fixed by the end of the fic. The second is offset by all the other characters doing well. The third is not a criticism of your writing and is much more my personal tastes. I either like stuff really dark (hence all the Jalex angst on my favorites list) and complicated, funny, or both.

Overall a very good work. I do prefer your oneshots a bit, but this is a strong work as your first long fic, and lacked my own issues with the greater story.
WyldCard4 chapter 28 . 7/30/2010
One chapter to go, after this review is done. That one will leave a few more general comments as well as this immersion diary style of reviewing.

Miley Stewart has a zany scheme? What are the odds?

More seriously I've mentioned elsewhere that it just doesn't feel like Hannah Montana if Miley doesn't have some harebrained scheme. Even absolutely excellent fics (read everything by Kurrent, just read it) feels off if Miley isn't scheming her heart out. I even had trouble with the movie because Miley wasn't scheming enough. I'm glad to see she has a plan.

Not bad as far as Miley plans go. Lilly should have been dressed up as a dragon and Miley needed SOME kind of guitar, but still not bad. It seems that it somehow all worked out in the end.

Now just to assume that both of their careers are ruined and never read the last chapter. (I'm joking, but I kind of had that reaction at the end of The Dead Poet's Society).

London scares me too. She is just that awesome. She's a bastard, but awesome.
WyldCard4 chapter 27 . 7/30/2010
On bookmarking...

Honestly I got a bit crazy with favoriting stuff early on, so I rarely favorite stories anymore. I do try to review almost all the time, but favoriting is pretty rare for me now. Besides, you don't have incest, lesbian sex, or raped Jonas Brothers, and I need to have SOME standards for what I favorite.

*realizes just how frightening my favorites list is*

I get a bit of a Liley vibe from your Miley and Lilly (LILLY NOT LILY! Um, sorry). Not sure if it's intentional or not, but half of Hannah's conversations are either talking about having fun with Lola or being comforted by Lola.

You know I always assumed the costume changes were always set up and organized much better than how you depict them. I can't remember them ever darting around to get changed like that. I assumed that studios and such knew at least enough to give them changing rooms at their request.

Poor Miley.

I'm sure someone else has mentioned how it was a good idea to have Miley meet Mikayla out of her Hannah persona. If they haven't, well you need a much better class of reviewers.
WyldCard4 chapter 26 . 7/30/2010

I keep meaning to write up some large essay on how I think Disneyverse has a slightly different culture and religious swears are Not Allowed, but I kind of suspect that someone would point to a censor slip up and make me look really stupid.

Cody's dealing with fame makes me giggle. Kind of a pity he landed Mikayla, as he can't take up on any of the offers, if he's at all sane at least. I wonder if any of the guys are cute...

Hm, Zack and Cody need some kind of disguise. Hey, it's Disney, a wig would work.

London and Zack are your best characters in this fic. The two really work well, and you keep their most hilarious quirks while making sure they're likable.

Honestly, Cody and Mikayla aren't quite as good. Mikayla in Hannah Montana is amusingly mean, while you didn't capture Cody's neurotic elements as well. Certainly Cody is better than the abomination we see on the deck, but still he isn't perfect.

I do wonder where the canon Mikayla is. I doubt it is quite as bad as your fic, but she has dropped off the face of the Earth and an identical wizard popped up in New York. Hm, I wonder if there's a connection...

The end is nigh...

Now I'm worried that our princesses of pop will never do battle in outer space. How could you have teased me so cruelly? Do you know how long and hard I have looked for a story about Hannah Montana fighting in space? How could you :(
WyldCard4 chapter 25 . 7/30/2010
Note, last review I meant 23 and 24, not 22 and 23. Since I had viewed the prior chapter it looked like I was talking about those chapters. Just a mistake.

Things are getting complicated now. I don't see a natural way out of this. Naturally I assume you have no plan so you will just bring in the Wizards Council to do something.

*looks uncomfortable*

It was my first fanfic...

If I had to think of a way out, it would be to start selling Hannah as the Bad Girl and use the feud to their mutual advantage for publicity. I doubt that is your answer though, and there's no way Team Hannah would go for it.

Mr. Moseby sent chills down my spine there. Poor Miley Ray Stewart. Wouldn't mean as much to her, but hearing that from Mr. Moseby was hard.
WyldCard4 chapter 24 . 7/30/2010
Oh, I hate Let My Love Open the Door. We might not have similar musical tastes.

The conversation about virginity is interesting. Ideally I think waiting is a Good Idea, and none of them really are mature enough to make decisions about sex.

OK, I LIKE the football injury scene. The character of Jim is brief and memorable.

OK, that had better not be the final battle between Mikayla and Hannah Montana. I was promised a fight in SPACE! I have been searching for Hannah Montana riding a robotic dragon while playing an electric guitar since I came to Disney fanfiction, and you had better not disappoint me.


Since you asked, 22 and 23 are hard chapters to compare. 23 has a lot of resolution and set up, while 22 had interesting details and scenes.
293 | Page 1 2 3 4 11 .. Last Next »