|Reviews for Their World|
| Sardonic Kender Smile chapter 1 . 5/25/2009
[stopped caring about whom Baron Whats-His-Face or Countess Wears-Overpowering-Perfume really was.] Aha! I've finally learned the difference between "whom" and "who". Apparently you use "whom" in a sentence when you can insert him/her, and "who" in a sentence where you can insert he/she. And since "stopped caring about who him or her really was" isn't correct, I think it should be "who", not "whom". Unless I got confused :/.
[Kent, the only man she wanted to dance with at the grand parties hosted by Caelin or Pherae or Ostia or Laus.
Kent, who was not allowed to dance with her in public.] ;O; These two lines-!
[Kent, who could be hurt for loving her, for holding her in his arms, for kissing her and touching her face.] And that's REALLY sad. See also the line about he could be taken away from her. Poor Kent...in most fics we see Lyn going "What the hey", but here she's very aware of what could happen to him. I like that.
Wait a minute...you got the "whoms" and "whos" in the last few lines right! Huh...maybe I made a mistake, above...anyways. Cool thing with the stylistic redundancy...I guess I'm a tad too impatient for such things, though, because towards the end I just started skipping over the first couple words of every sentence xD. Awesome at any rate.
| jordan114725 chapter 1 . 5/23/2009
This was interesting. I liked the concept, and I thought you played your ideas out quite nicely.
| Qieru chapter 1 . 5/19/2009
*cracks knuckles* Ah, the first of many~ x3
And first of all, you're so amazing for writing all these for me. ;0; I never expected so much!
This one was so sweet~. The short, repetitive sentences conveyed the feelings and meanings so well. It's short, but feels like an entire story has been told completely, or is at least leaves one feeling 'full', so to speak. x3
[Kent, who made her feel loved and wanted, who believed in her, who danced with her out on the hill behind the castle in the rain.
Kent, who could be taken away from her if anyone thought that something was going on between them.] I liked these two lines a lot~ Especially the last one, for all it tells, I think.
Thank you~ *A*