|Reviews for False Friends|
| andysanime chapter 3 . 8/29/2010
Good job on this, it was funny!
| Elemental Gypsy chapter 3 . 6/18/2009
Mwahaha, this chapter was so funny! I simply love the way you write badass Kai. I also love how you effortlessly point out all the flaws in spotlight stealing Sues like Crystal (and all your other purposely written Sues) here. It’s great fun to read, it truly is.
I think I got dizzy counting all the ridiculous clichés you’ve thrown into this story. I mean, there has to be at least 20 in these three chapters alone, and unfortunately, mirrors the stories of Suethors that plague this site. I mean, if I didn’t know you were writing this, I’d think that this was just some Suthor fanbrat with another obnoxious cliché ridden story!
Keep up the great work and continue to put those obnoxious clichés in their place, please! I always get a laugh whenever Kai makes a Sue cry.
Looking forward to more work from you in the future!
| kaitouahiru chapter 3 . 6/14/2009
Aw, its finished already? I liked it. it was a good one. Go Kai! No one gets rid of fangirls faster then Kai! Congrats on finishing another great story!
| marishka91 chapter 3 . 6/13/2009
Heya Mika here, this was a great chapter. I loved the whole thing, I loved how Kai delt with the fanbrat and the part at the end where she was gonna use Bryan to release all of her pent up anger and how Bryan was totally willing and actually looking forward to it. Keep up the amazing work and please update soon. XXMikaXX
| van chapter 3 . 6/13/2009
wow what is Crystal problem anyway? will great new chapter also i wonder what will happen next?
| angelvan105 chapter 3 . 6/13/2009
wow kai have guts to say to right to Crystal! wow awesome new chapter keep it up!
| Xx.LoveIsABlessing.xX chapter 3 . 6/13/2009
Love it that Crystal got it! Another awesome story! You a awesome author!
| Rapunzelle chapter 3 . 6/13/2009
Love it when kai gets all annoyed. Loved this story and cannot wait for more updates.
| CleverPhoenix chapter 3 . 6/13/2009
DAMN THOSE STUPID OCs! I really can't understand how authors can really believe that they would immediately fit in and be adored by all of the main characters. Can't they see how childish that is? Anyway, I loved Kai's rant and imagining Crystal running away, tail between her legs was very satisfing. Please keep up the great bashing!
| The Cattan Wolf chapter 3 . 6/13/2009
Crystal is DEFINETLY the most annoying OC you've created, but she's not as annoying as annoying as a certain writer who replaced Mathilda with an OC, which she then paired with Kai, made an OC team up, paired them with the bladebreakers and Tala, killed hillary, gave brooklyn the worlds most annoying OC sister, and made Bryan into an egoistical, violent bastard who raped her OC's. Let's just say she's lucky I don't know where she lives.
| mimic shalle chapter 3 . 6/12/2009
lol, expected nothing less from miss Kai heehehee... she sure showed that wannabe her place, very nice ending very fitting really xD, and you even manage to find some use for fanbrats D
Nice little story, really enjoyed reading this, hopez you'll have more in line xD
| GabZ chapter 3 . 6/12/2009
YEEY! you only missed the parte where the girls go on Kai-I-Love-You-Mode and then realize he is a she... i would like to read how they want to die XDD coz i don't think the OC's creators nor the mary sues' or self inserts' could handle something like that YEEY
| Kiseki Lin chapter 3 . 6/12/2009
I've been reading through your stories (and I guess this is the first time I'm reviewing :P) but I would like to say that the points made in the story (in fact, all of your stories I've read) are absolutely true. I terribly dislike when people make their OCs being part of the Abbey, especially if they're female. I still don't remember ever seeing a female in the Abbey.
I can't understand why they can't give them a decent, normal past and if they beyblade, a medium amount of power. No, all I usually see is that the female is all-powerful and guys begin fighting over her 4/5 of the OC stories I've read. There's nothing wrong with a nice girl with an occasional attitude. No one's perfect, but they always take it to the extreme and make them into total bitches. If any girl like Crystal showed up and started acting that way to any of my friends or myself, I would have no problems lashing back. I don't like confrontation much, but when faced with an annoying spoiled brat, one must really think over.
It's hilarious reading your anti-OC stories with FemKai. I'm usually a fan of OCs, but I can't really take the sheer unreasonableness of how they present themselves and how out of character the canon characters become. It's nice to see how the different points of bad OCs don't work. I hope that people who read and write OC Beyblade stories will take a look at the points and try to at least make a believable OC or at least have the canon in character. It's hard making a well-written OC, but it's still very much possible if time and consideration is put into it.
I noticed that you have some typos (or what I think are typos) here and there, nothing too bad.
For example: “There was so much so could offer this team.”
I think it would’ve worked better if instead of the second ‘so’, it could be ‘she’.
Another example: “Bryan sniggered as she followed the seething female.”
I think you meant ‘he’ instead of ‘she’ since it was Bryan that followed Kai.
I think there were a few more, but it’s in spots that if you don’t look carefully, you might not even spot. There’s not much as far as I can tell and your writing style flows rather smoothly.
I can't wait to see more of your stories.
| Angelfang chapter 2 . 6/4/2009
keep writing this story
| Elemental Gypsy chapter 2 . 6/4/2009
Haha, this chapter was hilarious! OMG, go Tala! Heh, I just love the true backstory and how Tala didn’t remember much of her at all as she did nothing overly important, despite Crystal claiming otherwise. I mean, talking herself up as being so utterly important, powerful and lustworthy?
Pfft, yeah, right.
I also like the explanation as to why Boris wouldn’t have a girl in the Abbey and why he wouldn’t risk hiding one in an underground lab somewhere. Yes, a new and powerful blader suddenly arriving on the scene would be a tad hard to explain!
“Everyone knows there were no girls in the Abbey.” He suddenly rolled his eyes toward the ceiling and pressed his two fingers against his forehead. “Man, how many times do I have to say that?” he muttered bitterly.
For as long as there are obnoxious Mary-Sues claiming to be from the Abbey, I’m afraid, Bryan. –patspats-
Yes, Kai is appearing in the next chapter. I can’t wait. –giggle madly with anticipation- She won’t be happy, that’s for sure.