|Reviews for Adverse Reaction|
| HairSpunofGold chapter 14 . 11/22/2009
aww i love this story :D
| Taeniaea chapter 14 . 11/20/2009
cool story plz update it soon
| ME chapter 14 . 11/17/2009
This is a great story. I really hope you'll write a sequel.
| booksmartblonde333 chapter 14 . 11/16/2009
This was so good. I loved every minute of it.
| AnglcDmn1986 chapter 14 . 11/16/2009
I really love the story...but all of the pronouns REALLY threw me. We already know all of that, so why use them so much?
| ba2006 chapter 14 . 11/16/2009
Love it :) Wish you would do a sequal.
The ending was great :)
cant wait for the next fic you write :)
| Reader chapter 14 . 11/15/2009
I saw that this story was marked as complete. Are you going to do a sequel? Please :)
| Taaroko chapter 14 . 11/15/2009
Okay, I've tried to be polite and supportive, but this is ridiculous. I wanted to enjoy the happy "what will tomorrow bring" ending, but I couldn't because I was constantly sidetracked by the flood of unnecessary descriptive identifiers. They have to stop. They're like cholesterol blocking an artery, and the story is suffering because of them. We already know that Buffy is blonde, a fledgeling, a Slayer, Angel's mate (that one in particular just feels awkward, even when not used twice a paragraph, but that might just be me and my dislike of the slightly bestial connotations of the word), the woman Angel loves, eternally youthful, and Willow's best friend. You don't have to beat all of that into our skulls over and over again; we *get* it. The same goes for your extreme avoidance of "said", which makes dialogue read in a very unnatural manner, especially when combined with that descriptive identifier problem. An "asked" or "demanded" or "pleaded" or "giggled", etc. here and there is great when you really want to reinforce that a bit of dialogue is more than mere talking, but too much of that destroys the flow of the conversation. You're great at character analysis and portrayal, your plots are interesting and engaging, and your grammar and spelling are practically faultless, so please don't let these very simple flaws continue to cripple your writing.
| angel1969 chapter 14 . 11/15/2009
I loved the chapter you wrote...Congratulations! You got a very good star of feedback from me..
| ba2006 chapter 13 . 11/7/2009
yay another chapter :) cant wait for the next update
| booksmartblonde333 chapter 13 . 11/6/2009
Haha. Spike drunk is funny. And a intsy bit bipolar. :)
| Taaroko chapter 13 . 11/6/2009
*dramatic chord* And Drusilla's death will probably make Spike a lot more focused in carrying out an actual plan rather than acting on a bunch of reckless impulses.
Seriously, though, there were *way* too many descriptive identifiers in this chapter (and, frankly, all of the chapters). You identified Willy like seven different ways. We've seen the show. We already know Willy, what he looks like, what he does for a living, and how much of a greasy lowlife he is. There's really only room for *one* "weaselly barman" type thing to remind us of what kind of guy he was on the show, and then just simple pronouns, with his name thrown in here and there to make sure we're following who's saying what. It was hard for me to focus on what was happening in the chapter because all of the greasy human/short, corrupt bartender/dive's owner/barkeep/whatever stuff was so distracting and unnecessary. This is really the only problem I can see in your writing, which is otherwise quite excellent and insightful.
| angel1969 chapter 13 . 11/5/2009
Hi, Well Welcome back...I liked the chapter...too bad dru died...I hate Dru and Spike...They make me sick...Good job...
| pinkyblue-ice chapter 12 . 9/11/2009
I need more please. This is so great. When will you be updating again, I hope it is soon. Gr Arrg
| angel1969 chapter 12 . 9/3/2009
I am glad that you wrote jenny calendar out of the story...Inever liked Jenny. Good chapter...