|Reviews for Sun & Moon|
| Legendary Biologist chapter 1 . 11/12/2015
Oh, a Brandon x Maria work! :D
Descriptions are top-notch. The way the evening sky is described is perfect; it just paints an image of the evening sky in my mind. And then, the descriptions of the streets and alleys are just as great. The more respectable areas are clean and free from broken glass and other sort of rubbish, while the slum is likely to have those things scattered on the ground.
Also, I can relate to Maria being hasty and rather afraid when the sky has gone dark. The description of the surroundings, particularly the silence and how little noises become loud (like Maria's own footsteps), greatly adds the tension. And Maria believing that other noises are caused by cats just makes her more relate-able. It's a huge relief when Brandon then appears.
I've always thought that Uncle Jester's thoughts on Brandon are really sad. Brandon may be part of a gang, but he is actually a more honest and heroic type among all them (though overall, his friends aren't like other street thugs in the town). This line [As they said, clothes don't make the person.] (though here I'd like to suggest writing this line entirely in past tense) is very fitting. If it weren't for Brandon, those thugs would've succeeded in assaulting Maria.
Characterization of Brandon is perfect. He is quiet. [Wordless.] indeed. Maybe shy, but that isn't always true. Quiet people are often smarter than they seem. I like that Maria thinks regards Brandon as that kind of quiet person.
[He was also just as fiery.] Yep. Brandon may be quiet, but he is fierce and full of determination inside. And he doesn't need to speak or scream to show that he's angry. His eyes are enough to show his anger. Really like the depiction of how Brandon can show emotions without having to talk, because that's just Brandon. :)
Speaking of capturing the essence of the canon, you've succeeded! :D Brandon and Maria are clearly lovers, but the relationship doesn't feature lots of touches and kisses (maybe just a hug or two and occasionally, a quick kiss may be expected). Here, there aren't many of those things, which is why I think you've portrayed the Brandon x Maria relationship exactly like what is expected from the anime. Very well done!
Just a little thing: if a dialogue tag after a speech indicates that a character is speaking, the preceding speech ends with a comma instead of a period. ["Thank you for walking me home tonight," she said,] is the correct form. Well, yep, that's my only suggestion for this great piece. :)
| Matrix Taylor chapter 1 . 1/30/2013
| JigokuYume chapter 1 . 7/15/2009
I must say that I was absolutely blown away. heh fluff or not but I think that you captured everything from the anime to the couple themselves. I must say this one's going on my favorite's list. please continue to write. i'd look foreward to more of your stories.
| randompandattack chapter 1 . 6/17/2009
That was really good! I think you did a great job at capturing the essence of Brandon Heat, also the essence of their relationship.