Reviews for The Demon of Carmallo Island Revised Version
Thomas Drovin chapter 10 . 11/16/2009
Welcome back at LONG last! So Snooker has his own agenda huh? Probably wants to protect the world from square things! *Chuckles*

Anyway at least he helped defeat ONE of Koma's goons, but what about the others? Update again soon so we can see! Later!

PS: I'm afriad that I can't help with the Bleach bit, hopefully others can. See you then!
Amethyst Turtle chapter 9 . 11/16/2009
Robin's sort of out of character... not the Wrath parts, I just don't think she screams that much. Come to think of it, I've neve heard her actually scream before besides Enies Lobby.

Ah, whatever. This story's great.

I have a question! Why do you sound so angry when you answer the SBS questions? (and yes, I'm just asking to be blown up to bits)
dandy wonderous chapter 9 . 9/18/2009
I loved the lines about the fumigators. XP

Oo, Snooker, what ARE you up to? XD
Thomas Drovin chapter 9 . 9/18/2009
Welcome back! Usopp and Nami's bacon has been saved by Snooker, however they will NOT be happy to see him mainly becasue he led them there and got those sin crests. I hope he's got a GOOD excuse! Update again soon!

PS: So the Count is NOT aware of the Oddball Pirates, I take it the self centered little snot dosen't take an intrest in the events of the Grand Line? If he DOES where does he get his information?
Thomas Drovin chapter 8 . 8/21/2009
Welcome back! I see that the Count has called in some extra thugs for help, whatever he has planned must be pretty special for his plans! I can't wait to see them! Update again soon!

PS: Question for the SBS "The Count has the powers of the Demon Demon Fruit, is he aware of Kari and her Angel Angel Fruit powers?"
dandy wonderous chapter 8 . 8/21/2009
Oo, it is getting interesting. This Johnson guy sounds sadistic... the best kind of villian! XD XD

Aw, no questions for Hyakuhana-san? Okay, here, answer this!

*points at you* YOU! What's your favorite food, color, kind of muffin, umbrella, season, ecosystem, AND! piece of furniture?
GreyMonkey chapter 8 . 8/21/2009
yo, remember me?

nice to see this story isn't dead.

(SBS Question) What type of devil fruit is the Demon Demon fruit, Zoan or Parimica?

(note: I'm tring not to spoil anything for anyone who hasn't read the original version). What are you gonna do about "whitey's" devil fruit? Current chapters show that his fruit is taken. Mabey a mythical zoan type: manticore instead? It could fit without you having to change too much of the original story.

update soon.
Majin Hentai X chapter 7 . 8/4/2009
This is good it feels very One Piece. This actually feels like a One Piece filler arc I like it a lot keep going.

You got everything right except the Asura.

Gear Second, Gear Third, Asura,and Diable Jamble are not ordinary skills they are the manifestation of their will power and resolve to bring back Nico Robin that dire burning will born by defeat and loss the one reserved to saving those most precious to one's self the evolution to acquire greater power.

Sorry I think I've watched Gurren Lagann to many times its your fic do what you will but update soon please this is cool
Kiyamasho chapter 7 . 7/31/2009
great chapter!

i wonder where Luffy took off to?
Thomas Drovin chapter 7 . 7/31/2009
Welcome back! So our friendly Straw Hat Pirates have the seven deadly sins on them making the count more powerful. 2 options are 1) Die or 2) Find another way to defeat the count...who's for 2?

Great work on this! And before my birthday too! That makes this a gift in itself!
dandy wonderous chapter 7 . 7/30/2009
Haha, this was great! Very funny.

Oh dear, Sanji and his magazines... O.O

Asura cameo; awesome!

Alas, I have no question for you today. Looking forward to more!
dandy wonderous chapter 6 . 6/30/2009
Oh no, our heroes are down! *frantic*

“Another one bites the dust.”

I actually had to stop for a second to sing that... Big Queen fan.

“You hurt my friends, I break your face!”

Haha, like the facebook flair/sticker!

For the SBS: Do Koma's attack names mean something? And thanks for the hug, Kommy-kins!
Thomas Drovin chapter 6 . 6/26/2009
Welcome back! Looks like Luffy and his friends are in REAL trouble now! However it looks like that girl has roped Tarbley into helping her. How did she managed that and for what purpose? Update again soon so I can find out!

Trabley: Oh by the way Hyaku I'd stop Koma from hugging you, however she insisted and I couldn't say no to such a pretty face.
Thomas Drovin chapter 5 . 6/18/2009
Welcome back! Our friends the Straw Hats have REALLY walked into the lions den here! I think after meeting the count we can figure out WHO the demon is! I see that Sanji has competition with Tarbley, SHOULD he survive it'll be fun to see how a fight between the two of them goes. Update again soon!

Zippy: *Reading a romance novel* I wonder how he knew I sell my Rokushiki skills around?
dandy wonderous chapter 5 . 6/18/2009
Hilarious chapter! I love how slow Luffy is.

The whole "Seven Deadly Sins" thing is interesting. I can't wait to see who's what! (though I can already guess almost everyone)

As for the attack thing, you can go to the One Piece Wikia for whenever the attacks first appear. But for 72 Pound Cannon, Zoro actually says he wants to try something new in Skypeia before using 36 Pound Cannon. 72 Pound Cannon doesn't appear until Enies Lobby.

As for Rokushiki, as long as you've already ticked off the ever frightening Span-man, you might as well do whatever you want.

On a writing perspective, I admit I wasn't too impressed in the first parts of this story, but now I see serious improvement. This was very well written.

On a nit-picky note, I notice you forget your commas at the end of quotes before "s/he said" (this is a common mistake). For example:

"I'm hungry," said Luffy.

But keep exclamation points and question marks!

For your SBS:

Koma! You sound cute! Can I have a hug if I give you a cookie? Hmm? Pretty please?

This looks really fun, can't wait for updates!
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