|Reviews for Happy Hour|
| inside-the-disarray chapter 1 . 6/4/2009
Loved it :)
I was wondering where this could go given the T rating. Loved the little twist. What a fun game.
You created such a perfect visual of Jasper, especially at the end with that eyebrow raise. (And what a wonderful visual it is: both the button-down and t-shirt were hitched up above his wrist, exposing a thin slice of skin just above the waist of his dark jeans.)
What a great story. Happy birthday to Legna!
| yenafer chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
i was getting to the end thinking She can't end it like that! I have to know MORE
quite the little twist there at the end. reunion games and wifey; nice, very nice
loved the barnacle to the new Titanoc line
lovely little birthday present for miss Legna!
| Merina Green chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
| Di Michelle chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
Lol HAHA! Loved the ending! It was really cute!
| NCChris chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
AWESOME! I actually laughed out loud at the ending!
| Vendell chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
OMFG!- this is fantastic!
you set me over the edge when he kissed/licked the wine off her wrist
| vtjaime chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
That is all. :)
| americnxidiot chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
If I liked it, you know you're doing something right :)
Excellent one-shot, bb. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEGNA!
| daisy3853 chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
you are the best ficwife ever!
that was so good... i'm more than a little flustered and incoherent now.
excellent descriptions... the forearms, hands, everything.. guh.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEGNA!
| betheany chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
Ha! You're a bit of a tease. But it was still full of awesome. What a fun welcome home game.
| my2galspal chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
I do love me a Bella/Jasper story, even if it is just a one-shot. This was lots of fun. I have your multi-chapter fic on my list of to reads. Can't wait to get to it now that I've read your work.
Thanks so much for sharing this story with the rest of us.
| Legna989 chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
“They said that there was something unique about the caliber of guy that would come here. I agreed. Unfortunately, I also felt that ‘unique,’ in this case, meant ‘excruciatingly bad.’” The story of my life. :)
“He was standing with one hand in his pocket, pushing the edge of his button-down shirt up to his waist. The button-down was a solid light blue and I would have put money on it matching the color of his eyes. The button-down covered a dark grey shirt, and where his hand was in his pocket, both the button-down and t-shirt were hitched up above his wrist, exposing a thin slice of skin just above the waist of his dark jeans. The sleeves of his shirt were rolled up above his elbows and the combination of the bare forearm and tiny span of bare flesh...” Guh. Just…guh. I may have to go to a random bar tonight just to see if it’s possible you actually did write him into existence for me. :)
“surreptitious stalking” Hahahahaha. Wait, is Bella at Panera?
“Mr. TB&H’s huge hand – and it was huge…” BB, you know what I like.
I love that he catches her staring at his perfect ass. “Did you find them back there?” Hahahaha.
“All of those years of school had prepared me to handle twenty-two ornery, hyper, maddening six-year-olds, but nothing had taught me how to face the onslaught of hot and heavy that Mr. TB&H was raining down on me right now.” I love this line.
“…maybe I had contracted malaria from one of the kids at school and was lying somewhere in a hospital, delirious with ridiculous images of blond he-men.” Hm. Maybe I should to contract malaria for my birthday, if this is the result.
” It was like my eyes had gone on vacation to a luxurious spa; I had no control over them – they were going to get their money’s worth out of that Deluxe package on which they’d splurged, regardless of what I wanted them to do.” Hahahaha.
I was hoping he’d be on a motorcycle. :sigh:
“I felt the cold air whip around us and I used it as an excuse to fasten myself to him like a barnacle against the hull of the shiny, new Titanic.” What a fabulous metaphor. TitanicJasper. I like.
“I know how much you look forward to our little Reunion Game.” I love that it was a little role-playing game! So cute. So sexy.
BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT, EVER. You are awesome on top of win. Thanks to Accio, americnidiot and Touchstone for the assists, too.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I know I won’t be able to stop smiling today.
| AccioBourbon chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
I have already declared this Jasper like something out of a dream, and I would *still* say that even if I didn't know your inspiration for the visuals. :-) Seriously. The clothes, the hair, the eyes, the huge hands (smirk) just... ohmygosh. Let's go hack and add him to the definition of sex appeal.
And let's not forget our narrator. There's something pretty lovable about Bella here. She's kind of cranky, pessimistic, so very determined to *not* have a good time in this bar. She looks at everything around her with a kind of faint disdain. Why, we might even say she's a woman in serious need of getting... a drink. :-)
So many cool lines I cannot count them all. Oh, well... let's do it anyway!
"But all thoughts of rebuke evaporated like rain on a radiator..."
"I wondered what kind of Coyote Ugly dance had made these marks."
"“Did you find them back there?” His sparkly eyes threw sparkly jabs at me and amusement made the Christmas bells ring as if angels had been told a naughty joke." Freaking *perfect."
“You can see your friends later.” Gulp.
"I closed my eyes and let myself just feel." I love this and the paragraph that follows it. It shows us a Bella who's letting go of all the stress she was carrying around when we first met her. Maybe it's not a drink she needs after all, just a good... ride. Come on... it was begging to be said. ;-)
The reveal- just perfect, Elle. Love the arched eyebrow. It's the first hint that something's going on. I can almost see an eyeroll from Bella as she reaches into her purse. And how many of us can relate? What is it about men and keys? :-)
Great job, lady! I adored this.
And: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ALISON! I don't care if you are a lawyer, an amazing beta, and damn good writer to boot. You'll always be the kid who showed me the picture of TK and encouraged my discovery of FNL. Have a wonderful day!
| LaViePastiche chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
OMG Happy Birthday Legna!
Thanks so much for sharing the present with the world! This awesome awesome. OK my heart fell a little at the T rating because I'm a perv but still - it was so great and sexy without sex.
Your descriptions of Jasper? Crap I nearly fell out of MY seat. You have to stop doing this to me.
"He chuckled and it was a warm rich sound that reminded me of... Christmas. Christmas bells and ivory candles and satin... What the hell? I shook my head again, the random visions vanishing in a haze of cigarette smoke." -CLUNK.
"His shirt was untucked all the way around and the tail of it came to rest halfway down his ass. Whoever had picked out his jeans – and I hoped it was him or his mother because it certainly wouldn’t do if he had some other girl picking out his clothing for him – had known how the pockets on the back of his jeans would certainly accentuate, uh, some of his finer features. And fine they were" -FLATLINES
Ok, sorry - Where was I?
"he reached down and smoothly ran his hand from my ankle all the way up my leg, stopping just as he reached my hem. I shivered under his touch and tightened my arms around his waist. My chest was pressed against those rippling muscles I’d been admiring earlier and now, up close and personal, I was not disappointed to feel that they were as impressive as they looked." ... beep...beep...bep bep bep bep
THIS LITTLE STORY IS FUCKAWESOME. Thank God I had that Defib. installed after you started posting FitV...
THANK YOU LEGNA FOR HAVING A BIRTHDAY.
the end was so sweet and cute and now i'm gonna go imagine what happens next :P
| Tiggrmommi chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
Aw so sweet! His wifey. Her hubs. Coming home from a trip...acting like strangers. Keeps the marriage "new and exciting". Thanks for sharing!