|Reviews for Patricide|
| rog457 chapter 11 . 9/18/2009
Its amazing that Dean can function at all with all the baggage he carries around. You captured exactly what I would imagine his internal dialogue would be. He is so convinced that he can do nothing right, that he deserves not only all the punishment he gets but is amazed that anyone, especially John would choose to be near him. Its heartbreaking that he has so little self-esteem, one has to wonder where all that self-loathing comes from.
Love that John took the time to let Dean know that even the Great John Winchester could fail and that doesn't mean you are a failure.
I like that you ended the chapter on a up note with Dean feeling better about himself, enjoying trading punches with dear old dad.
| UnholyMuse chapter 11 . 9/18/2009
This was just what the doctor ordered. I love your inner-Dean dialogue. You really get into his head with the doubt and self-recriminations and self ass-whooping. He's REALLY hard on himself, and I would imagine that that's something that hasn't changed since he was younger. Dean tends to internalize, especially with John, it seems.
It's so sad that he thinks that his father wouldn't have been mind-fucked like he was - as though Dean is somehow so much weaker than The Great John Winchester. It's all a load of bull (right there with you on the 100 years in Hell thing). Dean's got his father up on a pedestal, and even though John Winchester was clearly one TOUGH SOB, there's no way he was as perfect as Dean thought he was.
But young!Dean? The hero-worship translates into self-loathing every time the kid thinks he's failed his old man. And it's so sad because I think, deep down, John probably wanted to worship Dean, too. He was a good kid (troubles with school and with the law notwitstanding) and he did EVERYTHING for his family. I'm sure when John had a moment or two to spare for his feelings, love for that kid must have made him choke a little at his own asswipery.
| PADavis chapter 11 . 9/18/2009
That was gorgeous. Sharing and caring a la John Winchester. Loved every word. This I adored:
Five minutes later we're standing toe to toe, trading punches. It's me and Dad, and Sam wouldn't get it if he was here. He wouldn't understand about me and Dad, and you know what? I don't expect him to understand. Not anymore.
This is what we are, and that's more than enough for me.
| enviousxbeauty chapter 11 . 9/18/2009
Look at John being all comforting. Great story. Can't wait for the next update.
| Twinchy chapter 10 . 9/13/2009
Gosh, that last attack at Daddy Winchester came completely out of left field, silver.
To say the truth, it's really sad that Dean believes the last time his Dad held him close like that, was when he was four...
Concerning the older son being angry at his father for knowing he'd do what he was told and come back out to get patched up... when didn't he?
So, no need to blame John for that. But then, the older brother isn't exactly in his right mind there now. Yet, I thought after the holy water in the shower (and what a nasty but completely convincing idea to have Daddy-dear handing out the enema, LOL) that'd be history - and John must have assumed the same.
| Twinchy chapter 9 . 9/13/2009
I love the comfort style Daddy Winchester dishes out at his oldest in this chapter. He surely knows how to do what needs to be done, but then, it was such a gorgeous thing to do, talking to Dean about all those things in the past, the good memories... and nothing to do with hunting for a change.
"When she tucked me in for the night Mom used to tell me that angels were watching over me. [...] Feathered bastards. I wasn’t the one they needed to watch."
Awesome point from Dean!
And it's really not all that hard to belive that during that time the older brother would have conflicting feelings about his younger sibling. After all, the two must have been pretty close then too, and it certainly broke Dean's heart losing Sam to "a better life".
| claudiapriscus chapter 10 . 9/6/2009
I've been following this story for a while, and it's always been good, but these last few chapters have just...worked so well. Clicked together. It makes me think of some of my favorite pieces of opera and classical music, where after many individual threads of music, they all suddenly layer together and become sublime.
| UnholyMuse chapter 10 . 9/5/2009
Oh no you DI-IN'T! What the heck? What the heck just happened there? Did Dean black out and 'Dark' take over or something? He attacked John again?
Oh lord! That poor boy needs some serious therapy! lol. And the holy water enema joke had me laughing out loud. Good freakin' God woman, that detail was hilarious. I nearly peed myself laughing when John got him going with that one. Too funny.
This chapter was both awesome and hard to read at the same time, if that makes any sense. Dean's inner walls are cracking and we're seeing his soft, tender underbelly and gosh it's a dark, sad, lonely place in there. That poor boy needs some serious TLC.
I think that's why I always liked Carmen in WIAWSNB. I know she was kind of Mary Sue, but she was a nurse and she loved Dean and TOLD him she loved him and that his family didn't know what it was missing. That's the kind of stuff Dean needs. Forget badass fighting girls like Jo or (God forbid!) evil girls like Bella. Dean needs some sweet, sweet lovin', man!
Once you're done hurting him in this story, you can just send him on over to me for some TLC. I'll fix him up nice and good with the love and worship of his body. ;)
| SimplyOut chapter 10 . 9/5/2009
| Merisha chapter 10 . 9/5/2009
Oh, you are so evil LOL XD ... but you know that! Another cliffie? And Dean was just starting to pull it together. Poor John must be frantic, Dean is injured and confused and I cannot wait for tomorrow LOL XD ... you're making me wish my life away ROFL XD
Huggles and luv
An anxious Mish :D x
| DeanBean chapter 10 . 9/5/2009
That was an amazing chapter
The imagery at the end of the fight between Dean and John was heartbreaking :(
I really can't wait for the next chapter
More when you can
| PADavis chapter 10 . 9/5/2009
How much do I love this chapter? Piss holy water on a demon? Dean remembering his childhood, making me get all choked up with wanting his mother to come to Pastor Jim's and say its been a big mistake... beautiful and poignant. But this:
I know it’s you. That’s the whole damn problem. I want to say that out loud, but I’m so pissed off feels like I'm strangling.
was like the knife in the gut. Brutal and honest and so sad. Feel all bruised from the angsty stick but in a wonderful way.
| PADavis chapter 9 . 9/5/2009
Well, here I didn't think I could be more in love with my very own story and then I get this chapter. I've already favorited and damn if this sight doesn't let you double and triple favorite stories. Big GOLD star. I love how John is caring for him, duct tape and all. The poster boy for normal..
Sorry to be late reviewing. I know, excuses x 3, but I'm back in town and now get to read another chapter right away! It's bliss.
| smartassmusicjunkie94 chapter 10 . 9/5/2009
I really loved this chapter and I can't wait for the next one. Dean and John's fight at the end was brilliant!
| PhoenixDragonDreamer chapter 10 . 9/5/2009
Oh god! Oh DEAN! *Sobs* God, this hurts so good! SO much love! So much...
*Sobs some more*