|Reviews for Story Fragments: Naruto|
| CupcakeTrue chapter 1 . 5/12
Well I've read all of these but I thought I'd reveiw those I go.
Personally I feel like there are way too many dark and depressing Narutos in fanfiction. Which is one of the reasons I love the idea of an insanely happy and cheerful Naruto. Not only does it give us a different perspective from the usual opinions on things, but it also gives us greatly different outcomes,and interactions with characters. Who knows maybe even some dark humor. As for the over powered problem I think the description of Narutos ability is vague enough to add certain restrictions later Naruto can only manipulate chakra a short distance from his body,or maybe prolonged use harms him somehow. As for the lighting thing it was in the forbidden scroll so there's probably some drawbacks. On top of that stuff your Naruto kinda seems lost in his own world,not really understanding things in full. I'm pretty sure zoning out isn't such a good thing for a ninja.
I'm not asking you to continue this one,even if I do like the idea of it. I understand that in order for a story to turn out good the author has to like what they're writing. You've probably got a million better things to do than write fanfiction.
| Annoy mouse chapter 4 . 1/9
You really worry about overpowering Naruto a lot, don't you? I guess I understand, what with it being so very hard not to. The only real way is to keep him as stupid as he is in canon, which is kinda annoying, huh? Sharingan, Kyuubi, kinjutsu, sage, summons... the whole series is just one growing OP clusterfeack I guess.
| lolreader39 chapter 1 . 4/28/2014
this fragment is very interesting and funny, but i have to agree with you. Naruto was just too powerful and it would get boring reading it eventually, much worse for the person writing it. you did make it very interesting to rad an OP Naruto story however.
| Ibskib chapter 4 . 8/20/2013
Pressure was mentioned, one way to avoid having the Tsukuyomi become overpowered is for Naruto only being able to unlock the Tsukuyomi when The Nightmare has build up inside him, turning it into something more like a pressure valve, learning to master it, would require a high degree of selfmastery, something that isn't easily achieved, which would help balance it out.
| 3dumplings3 chapter 4 . 8/18/2011
s' very interesting fragment. If you ever pick it up, I'd like to see what you do with it. But if you decide to or not, you can do it on your own time. Wheever you feel like.
| ranma hibiki chapter 4 . 4/18/2011
well these are some interesting ideas!
this one specifically makes me think less of naruto having the tsukiyome and a much more animal-instinct version of it...actually if you think of "Nightmare on Elm Street" with freddy kreuger getting into peoples dreams to hurt them, why can't naruto get into other ninja's heads and make them feel what HE feels?
he isnt actually brain hacking to such an extent like the uchiha that have the Mengengkyo, just a very basic version at its most possible worst that he has no control over.
and like you said, the fact he lives in this world of his 24/7 makes him a bit insane, he COULD sleep unlike gaara, but he never does from the constant pain and nightmares. if he could get any control over it he would be a much more effective ninja that might actually be a real threat to the uchiha and other S ranked ninja. as it stands he still only has his clones really can they use the same "power" like a clone of itachi could?
just have to be in a sort of "emo" or "dungeon/torture master" mood to be able to keep in character for this _
some good ideas here
keep up the good work
| Tactition101 chapter 4 . 8/17/2010
definitely interesting. If you don't mind I might give it a shot if i ever get through my other ideas.
| Tactition101 chapter 3 . 8/17/2010
having the akatuski act as vigilante A.N. enforcers i can definitely see. I actually have an idea where the Akautski was actually created when Madara was tasked by the first hokage to create a group to protect the bijuu that he gave to the other countries and their containers.
| Tactition101 chapter 2 . 8/17/2010
Another good idea. This one kind of reminds me of the one where shika is made an anbu afterr the sand/sound invasion.
| Tactition101 chapter 1 . 8/17/2010
i can definitely see that being a full story. Don't think that i could come up with that kind of way of thinking to write it though. I tend to be more logical in my writing.
| Guest chapter 1 . 6/21/2010
"And then there was the mysterious 'Killer Bee,' who did not look even close to human, with his odd coloration and unnatural size."
What, so black people aren't human?
If he was like Kisame it would be one thing, but considering there are plenty of dark skinned people in Kumo it's clearly not some unique quirk of his biju. Also, sure he's one of the taller characters but he's not exactly unique there either.
If there was some justification in canon for it sure... but since there isn't, one has to wonder just where you pulled this from.
| kitofthewind chapter 1 . 6/10/2010
HOLY FUCKING! That is one seriously messed up kid.
| Myobu-Uzumaki chapter 4 . 1/29/2010
I don't get why Naruto being overpowered bothers you so much. If he is overpowered, maybe make him enemies with such level of abilities as his or anything. The most important thing in a story is the plot, and the style of writing. Anyways, I definetly liked your Naruto-insane story, it was kinda funny, sad, but at the same time insane.
| Watchman chapter 1 . 10/22/2009
Really, it seems so strange for you to say that these stories don't interest you. I read quite a lot of Naruto fanfiction, and in my opinion, your stories are among the best. You may not have much interest in them, but when I'm reading them, they are incredibly captivating, and I love all the different premises. All the stories you write are among my favourites, so I hope you become more enthusiastic in your writing.
Best wishes, Watchman.
| dogbertcarroll chapter 4 . 6/14/2009
Tsukiome doesn't mean you have to suffer, unless the caster wills it. So really... I don't get the sense of this.