|Reviews for Her Majesty|
| Depthsofthemind chapter 1 . 1/5/2014
a little bit of fixing up grammar and this could be by S.E. Hinton.
| the perfect imperfection chapter 1 . 6/13/2009
Well, usually using second-person POV in writing irritates me, but I really enjoyed this. It actually took me a minute to realize you were writing in the second person because it just seemed natural. Present tense is tricky, too, because a lot of writers tend to revert to the past tense occasionally without realizing it. I'm thinking you might have done that once or twice, but if you did, it didn't mess too much with the flow of the story.
I know Angela can be tough to write, but I love her as a character. I like this portrayal of her - not too soft, but still kind of sympathetic (at least, I felt a tad sorry for her).
Obviously, no one's perfect, but your grammar is very good, which was a relief for me. Also, you either have very good spelling or ran this through spell check first (maybe both?). Either way, kudos.
Overall, I enjoyed reading this, especially the scene at the end from the book, which really stuck out for me as being very in-character for Angela. Nice job. :)
the perfect imperfection
| starryeyedwr1ter chapter 1 . 6/12/2009
I like it. I think you captured Angela very well and in some weird way you've shown a vulnerable side without making her appear weak if that makes sense? We get to see a hidden side but she is so caught up in showing off a hard front to the world.
I also like the new title, it works well.
| whatcoloristhesky chapter 1 . 6/8/2009
I wasn't sure what you were going to do with the information I gave you, but I think you did a fine job with it. :) There are some grammatical issues in places, but that's okay—no one's perfect.
I actually don't usually like when people write in the kind of POV you've written in, but I liked the feeling it gave the fic.
Good job, and thanks for the dedication. :)
| aerodynamics chapter 1 . 6/7/2009
I really actually enjoyed this, despite the grammatical issues. It was a very good look at the mind of Angela Shepard, and a few titles came to mind: Her Majesty (however, I don't think it's very good), or Nothing to No One.
I like Nothing to No One, but hey, it's up to you. Just some suggestions.
Anyways, keep writing. I enjoyed this.
| riverchild chapter 1 . 6/7/2009
This made me feel strangely sad for Angela, and also realize at the same time what a bitch she can be. It was a very interesting look into her character, and good writing.