|Reviews for Naruto's path of chi|
| avatoa chapter 11 . 3/29/2011
The sword Naruto just got is called a wakizashi, not wikizashi.
| avatoa chapter 7 . 3/29/2011
You sometimes called Nami Koori by mistake.
| avatoa chapter 1 . 3/29/2011
When mentioning Goku's martial art style, it's kame or turtle style not kumite.
| Reviewerdude chapter 14 . 3/27/2011
Oh yeah, I forgot to give you the last part of my rant, but for the sake of your time and mine I think I'll cut it short.
To put it simply naruto is too strong, come on your telling me he mastered his element affinity along with 2 others in the space of two months? That's not possible for anyone, certainly not an 11 year old kid.
Another thing that was unrealistic was narutos training, it is simply not possible for anyone to train nonstop for more than a week on end without food, water, or sleep (and again) certainly for an 11 year old academy student.
| Reviewerdude chapter 14 . 3/27/2011
Here are my critiques:
First of all, I know this is harsh, but the spelling and grammar in this fic is just short of criminally disgusting (really, I almost stopped reading because of it) so i think you should pay more attention to things like that.
Second, I hope this isn't some form of premature judgement, as I am yet to complete reading the whole thing, but the plot is really dull. Look at it from my viewpoint, other than naruto training at the five temples, nothing at all has happened to advance the plot of the story. Nearly half way through and you still have not established a proper antagonist, do you really expect your readers to be captivated by one-shot badguys that barely stick around for half a chapter? If you do then let me be the first to tell you that it's not working.
Third, Okay let me tell you something about AU/Crossover fics. They are held to a much higher standard because the are generally nothing at all like the real series. So a crossover fic with a really bad or monotonous plot ends up being way worse than it should have been. Basically what I'm saying is if you're going to write a crossover It better be damn good otherwise, readers start to get bored with the story easier than they usually would, and althouh this story has a great concept, I don't believe has a good enough plot.
Alright well I hope I wasn't to harsh I also hope that you will consider these things in your future works. See yah!
PS: I hope I'm not beating a dead horse, but would it kill you to proofread?
| Agato - The Hadou Inari chapter 20 . 3/15/2011
Don't why you put that sympathy shit with the pink haired bitch. She's most certainly not worth a damn dime, not by a long shot.
But then again you dreamers with your weak ass hearts are all like that.
| Agato - The Hadou Inari chapter 18 . 3/15/2011
Not bad but your placing words in spots that don't belong and that's something you need to fix.
| yama-sama chapter 9 . 2/8/2011
naruto , rock lee e tenten
jouning sensei maito guy
| G.J21 chapter 30 . 1/16/2011
Well here's a review on the story.
It was hard to understand with the grammar and spelling mistake.
Goku really pissed me off. All the answers, but doesn't tell Naruto until it too late. I think Naruto should whoop Goku a**, because right now I want to strangle the old man. gggrrr. It kind of makes me not want to read the next one, it's so frustrating. Here some advice I got from a writer. Always assume your readers are stupid. Make it easy from them to read. If you don't, they'll get frustrated and stop.
I do think this is a good idea and creative. I do agree with some of the other reviewers and believe Naruto is to powerful, but I thought it was a great idea that the two elders kick him out. It made it more realistic.
Hope it helps and keep writing. You have great ideas that need to be hear. :)
| ashter87 chapter 27 . 12/21/2010
look man i ignored it for 26 chapters but i honestly can not do it any more... I don't know if English is your primary language or not but some of the spelling and grammatical errors make this story hard to read and understand. i wish you luck in your writing but please get a beta to proof read your work.
| jake chapter 19 . 11/25/2010
okay you said that Naruto's hair and eyes turned black, does that mean he's a sayian or did it happen for the moment.
| andysanime chapter 30 . 11/15/2010
Good job on this story and... I love what you did to Sasuke XD
| nobody chapter 15 . 10/26/2010
can you start putting the song name at the bottom and great chapter
| Not In Use Anymore 35 chapter 18 . 10/3/2010
If you didn't finish the sequel or are working on a sequel to the sequel I think you should have Shenron turn Naruto into a full blooded saiyan with super saiyan potential.
| Not In Use Anymore 35 chapter 14 . 10/3/2010
I'm going to kill Sakura's mom!
'Death Note word'
Me: Light can I borrow you death note and tke it to the Naruto world someone made Sakura break our favorite Ninja's Heart.
Light: Fine (gives me the death note).
Me: Ryuk I'm making the Eye Deal.
Ryuk: Very well.
Mrs. Haruno: Hi boy what are you here for?
Me: To avenge Naruto.
Mrs. Haruno: Why do you care for that demon.
Me You know calling Naruto a demon in front of me is taboo'd Sally Haruno. ( Takes out the death note and pen)
Sally: How do you know my name.
Me: Because I'm the kira of the naruto world now 'Sally Haruno'
'30 seconds later'