|Reviews for Breakfast In New York|
| Ann Jinn chapter 1 . 6/17
I just love this story.
| greenking13 chapter 31 . 6/14
I have to admit, while I do agree with The Hermit about there being quite a bit of repetition, I'm am very glad I didn't decide to not read this story due to their review.
You do repeat yourself quite a bit, but at the same time the repetition helped cement various thoughts and helped keep the reader aware of who was with who and things like that.
I don't have much to say, except that I wasn't expecting the ending. I expected the whole "XX years in the future" but not the farewell to one of the integral characters. Still, I found the ending to be extremely fitting.
But good lord at how many children, grand children, and great grandchildren Harry and Hermione have. Also, the final line you have said by Hermione the second made my heart stop for a second. I seriously thought you meant Hermione's final moments were about to happen, even though wizards routinely live to be 100 in age.
Anyways, keep up writing, you're a great author,
| The Hermit chapter 17 . 6/3
Boy oh boy its like being stuck on the same page over and over. At least three quarters of this is repeatedly repeated I have to wonder if it is worth reading any more.
| In Harmony chapter 31 . 5/5
This is arguably one of my favourite fics here on FFN, and for good reason! The plot is well-developed and non-cliché, the characters all grow throughout the story and it’s one of the few that I’ve read where Ron, Lavender and Draco are redeemed. You did so in a plausible manner, no “Deus Ex Machina” moments where it’s really just because the author needed it to happen.
Some things that I felt detracted to your wonderful story were spelling, as oftentimes I had to break my rhythm just to understand why a word came in there when it was just a typo, and sometimes it felt like the characters were talking in the same style. Perhaps having a beta proofreading again will help with the spelling, and thinking more about the personalities and experiences of your characters and how they influence the character’s speech could address the second.
I loved the idea of the letters to explain things! Having them read the letters altogether just made it even better, as they get a feel of what the other person was going through and avoids the awkward “dancing around” phase since they were away for so long.
Overall a brilliant story, haven’t read one like this for quite a while!
| a.vago chapter 13 . 4/6
I like the plot of the story and the style.
The English is not my mother tongue, neither is my strength, still I must make a note:
There are differences among “your”, “yours” and “you are” ( “you’re”), respectively between “their” and “they are” (“they’re”).
Ex.: “Your sister” vs “You’re sister”, or “They are doing again” vs “Their doing”
I am sorry for the note!
Thanks for the great story!
| observentuser chapter 15 . 3/30
Reading it again. Really is a good story :-)
Thank you :-)
| waya715 chapter 31 . 3/7
aery good story!
| punkgod03 chapter 1 . 1/31
Oh my goodness. This is so good. I actually cried.
| cshen.julienne chapter 31 . 1/27
It was wonderful. Thank you for sharing your talent it us :) I applaud you for doing it for fun.
| cshen.julienne chapter 1 . 1/26
I love it :)
| Rebecca S. Thalacker chapter 1 . 1/24
I really enjoyed this one
| lakelady8425 chapter 23 . 1/10
That was a lovely, romantic proposal! Kudos, too, for inventing Eros Syndrome. I admire authors who create new magical concepts.
| lakelady8425 chapter 15 . 1/10
The baseball fandom bits are tedious and add little to your story. I hope there won't be much more of it.
| lakelady8425 chapter 13 . 1/10
How annoying that Ron would intrude on what should have been a private reunion of Harry and Hermione and their children and family. I still think he's a git with absolutely no sensitivity to others' feelings. He should have left when he realized what was going on and postponed his emotional outpouring for another day.
| tyrannicpuppy chapter 31 . 1/4
This story was truly spectacular. It was a ride fro beginning to end and I loved every single second of it.
I was too caught in the story initially to do the math so I was wondering whether Hermione had hooked up with someone before heading to University, but in the end you gave me the perfect answer. Harry really is the perfect father. he would dote on his children like crazy but would also ensure they have a healthy respect for rules, money and attention.
And can anyone truly compare to Hermione is his eyes. She will always be the perfect bride and mother of his children. And that is exactly what you have gifted us with.
Only issues I had were the conversations could tend to feel too quick. This is most probably down to how I read them, but as there was little beside the dialogue I often found myself being pulled through them very quickly. Not sure if this was intended (or even an issue for anyone other than myself) but it did detract a small amount.
And I sometimes found the long one sided explanations a little too heavy. An acknowledgement by another individual or a glance away stating how they were taking the words might help break that up a little bit, but again that could only be me, or could be exactly what you were aiming for.
All of the children in this story were magnificent. I adore Daphne and I'm sure she got a whole lot of the misplaced Mum issue. Teddy is always a strong favourite of mine and you did him very well. You even managed to redeem Ron and Lavendar to me, which was impressive given how this all began.
I am sorry to only review here at the end, but I just could not stop myself from wanting to charge ahead. There was always something new just beyond the page turn and I was compelled to get to it as soon as I could.
The letter were great. A fantastic way to fill in the time without having it come in a dialogue heavy conversation. And they just made me hate Ginny even more than I already did (which in this story is a lot let me tell you). That bint deserved everything she got.
I did like the changes to British Wizarding society as well. Great ideas there as to how to improve their world. And every scene between Harry and Hermione was just so sweet and perfect. I really adored them all.