|Reviews for PITCH|
| Dark Like My Bunny Soul chapter 32 . 7/9
This has got to be one of the best damn fics I've ever read, your style of writing is just so indescribable actually but very atmospheric somehow? It's almost like one of those movies, you know? It's very atmospheric and just ugh I don't know how to describe it but it's beautiful.
And I love this, I love the characters you've made them and how they stayed true to that the whole way even if I wanted to slap some sense into them 90% of the time...
I was leaning towards wanting them to say I love you but actually I'm kind of glad that they didn't it would have been out of place but ahh I'm so in love with this fic I've been telling my sister all about it
I can't tell you how much I love it seriously
| I Changed My Pen Name chapter 32 . 6/19
While I found L's detective skills lacking, and while I think he should've caught onto Light's machinations earlier, I still whole-heartedly love this fic. L may be shrewd in the series, but I don't think it's too much of a leap to assume he would be a social dunce, and I think you do well at his inner-monologue regarding everyday interactions. He comes across as too physically weak in some regards (he should've been able to handle Aiber, imo), so if you ever feel the need to edit this at some point, I would maybe rectify that a little.
But the real highlight of this fic is Light - how hungry he is for power, admiration, control. When L compares him to Ted Bundy I was amused. I typically don't like AUs or non-canon pairings or sexual fics, but your Light was so spot-on, I couldn't stop. It's a true feat to write a love story about someone with sociopathic tendencies and I applaud you for that. Thanks for a great story; I have read it many times already.
| Rhast chapter 2 . 6/2
All praise Long Islands!
| mermaidcat chapter 32 . 5/18
Oh my gosh I just devoured this in like two days cause I couldn't stop reading. Angsty and dark relationships are my favorite kind to read and so this was perfect! I LOVE IT! Thank you ever so much for sharing this with us!
| JUST NO chapter 21 . 3/12
This is OOC as hell. Especially L. I really see nothing of him in this story, like a completely different man that you just named him L. L is NOT this weak, you just forced him to be a submissive slut to satisfy some weird fetishes of yours. When he finally had some sort of control I really hoped he could fight back a little, to make them more equal, but NO.
Not to mention I couldn't see any hint of 'love' in this story. It's just pure physical relationship without actual plot, all I saw was “Light want to fuck L, L didn't like it at first but then he began to enjoy, then began to feel something, then they have sex regularly, continued to feel something, continued to have sex...blabla." Oh my God. It made your story so shallow with nothing memorable. But I have to admit you are quite good in writting sex scenes, so I read this like a PWP anyway.
| Chevonne Knowles chapter 32 . 3/10
This is one of the best stories I've read in a long time. I really appreciate the way you describe your scene how intelligent the writing is. I like that you don't go in to overly detailed sexual encounter scenes. I like that it's just enough description to take you there. I think that your story is what a story should be. Even though i don't read the fandom the story and the characters have drawn me in, that is something that is very wonderful. I like death note for the most part but I've actually never read a fanfiction of it until your story. thank you so much. I had to binge read, I just couldn't put it down.
| garnet86 chapter 1 . 1/18
I just had to leave a review again as I've re-read all of your Light/L stories recently and was once again amazed by your skill at both story telling as well as characterisation! I LOVE the dynamic between those two and you really manage to capture every aspect of their insane, beautiful and unique relationship! I'm so curious what your next project might be about - there are few authors like you who manage to write more than one great story that appeals to me! So I really hope you'll write something for the DN universe again soon!
| hpsoulmate chapter 32 . 9/12/2015
Love this story a lot! Especially the part where L is hijacked and in cuffs!
| Kaizen Kitty chapter 15 . 8/27/2015
Wow. That was an unexpected turn of events. I certainly didn't see it coming that Light would ambush Aiber and L with a gunned gang. It brings excitement back to the story. :-) Good job on pulling off a killer plot twist!
| Kaizen Kitty chapter 13 . 8/20/2015
Oh dear, L attempts to 'train' Light now. :-) What next?
Domestic violence and them wanting to change one another... This relationship is not healthy.
| Kaizen Kitty chapter 10 . 8/19/2015
A simple I Like You does go a long way indeed. ;-) Anyway, I like your story particularly for the back and forth L and Light have together. It's much like in canon: thrilling beyond relief, and a lot of the changes due to it being AU make sense.
Indeed, political lobbyist seems a fitting job for Light, who is so good at diplomacy. And Misa coming from an influential family justifies her childishness and her relation to Light - he can't well refuse her. XD I admit I was a bit put off at first by Light's smoking habit (the reason for it didn't make much sense to me). But when I got to that part where Light tries to convince L to have a smoke, which was so very sexy, I loved the deviation from canon. The fact that Light smokes and L writes on coasters also gave them a reason to come together (by borrowing each other's things) - quite clever on your part.
Also enjoyable that most of the characters are written in character: the conflict between Light and Soichiro still struck me in canon. It wasn't so blatant, but the antagonistic overtone was there. I like how you worked that in. Besides that, Light's cockiness when he converses with L, his possessiveness, his need to dominate, is just like in canon. And I like how you played into L's insecurities, his mannerisms are executed to a T. Everything down to L's very dialogue reminds of the hedgehog Light jokingly called him.
I know this fic is old, and it is impressive that you've written over 200.000 words, still I must impart come criticism on it (hope you don't mind, and that it might be helpful with future fics). I must say I'm rather baffled why L hasn't yet run a simple background check on Light. He constantly mentions his frustrations with how much Light knows about him, and that he wishes he knew more about Light. But the only steps he takes to find out more is by asking Light questions. That seems hardly efficient. And, given L's profession in this fic (detective), and his natural paranoia from canon, it seems likely that he might do some snooping around. It still baffles me that 10 chapters in, he hasn't yet done so. And I must say I am rather disappointed in L's qualities as a detective at this point in your fic.
:) I'll keep reading and see if that changes, because your story has intrigued me beyond doubt.
| shihiru chapter 32 . 6/6/2015
Finally I finished read this Raito and Lawliet's love journey story XD
You can describe their relationships from zero to become the healty mutual relationships with well.
I think this story need a sequel, you know ;)
| garnet86 chapter 32 . 4/26/2015
What an amazing story! I was completely absorbed in it from beginning to end - I just love the AU you've created and the thrilling tension between L and Raito! It was one of the most engaging, sexy and exciting things I've ever read and hope you'll continue to write more! Thanks for putting so much effort into this!
| Consulting Shippers chapter 32 . 1/12/2015
This was good. I loved everything about it :D
| Chillybean chapter 14 . 1/11/2015
I just got around to reading this story, and I don't care that's been complete for a while. I love it so far, and it needs some reviews!
Oh my sweet buns, I think I'm going to cry or be sick cause Aiber just needs to mind his own damn business. Bruh, just- NO. I feel like an ulcer is eveloping because I'm so stressed about what's going to happen with Ratio, his career, L, and flippin' Aiber. And Sayu! My god girl, I had hopes for you...
I think that your characterization of Ratio is pretty awesome, since he's a politician and all. I sort if feel that L is a TOO submissive in some chapters and not as intelligent, but I play that off as a result of him not being the best detective in the world.
This story first, and then your others.