Reviews for Condemned soul
BusyQuill chapter 1 . 10/23/2004
I like this one as well, it makes me feel slightly cold - very well done.
varia lectio chapter 1 . 7/3/2003
this is pretty good and eerie.
Chrisi chapter 1 . 4/3/2002
Liebe Violett!

Was soll ich sagen? Ich habe ernsthaft mit dem Gedanken gespielt über Commodus zu schreiben, doch ich glaube, dass es da nichts mehr zu schreiben gibt. Was du schreibst ist genau das, was ich über ihn schreiben würde, mit einem Unterschied: Es wäre niemals so emotional und einfach pefekt wie bei dir. So traurig, und gleichzeitig wunderschön, dass man weint. Danke!

Auch die Idee ist großartig: Während Maximus durch das Weizenfeld auf seine Familie zuläuft, ist es für Commodus nichts als ewiges Fallen. Es gibt niemanden, der ihn empfängt. Alles was ihm geblieben ist, ist die Erkenntnis über seine Fehler im Leben, alles was ihm geblieben ist, ist der Gang über die Ruinen seine Roms, und Einsamkeit mit der Schuld.

Ich hoffe noch mehr von deinen Commodus Gedichten lesen zu dürfen! *bitte*

Deine Chrisi!
Daae chapter 1 . 3/25/2002
Very good. Gladiator is one of the coolest movies! This was depressing, but I liked it! :)
Tabby J Skylark chapter 1 . 3/17/2002
Hey, hey! Good stuff. Some of those lines are just great! Nice title. Ancient Rome, Phoenix as Commodus - ya gotta luv it. _
RACHEL chapter 1 . 2/1/2002
great!
Slone'sTravelDreamer chapter 1 . 1/4/2002
Love the story. I almost feel bad for him. Almost.
sweetdreamer chapter 1 . 12/31/2001
wow that was good! poor commodus, even though he was evil i always liked him. keep it up!
Marxbros chapter 1 . 12/29/2001
Hi. Ok, you asked for reviews, so I will give you some praise about stuff I liked and some contructive criticism (hopefully). I liked this generally, especially some parts, and I thought a few of the lines were really vivid. I loved the last two lines..."no forgiveness and no oblivion / Just shattered dreams, shadows and dust..." I like how you incorporated the words from the movie and yet make them your own. I like the imagery of the ruined palaces...how Commodus can see the future of the fall of Rome. I also like "freezing wind and burning sun," the image of the two opposites is effective. Criticism: I thought the part from "Eternity..." through "understand it all" was kind of trite. Compared to some of the images, it was also ineffective. OVerall I really liked this, and I think with some editing -cutting some lines and choosing your words more carefully, this will be excellent. If you edit, make sure you post both the original and new versions.