Reviews for Water
FlightFeathers chapter 1 . 5/7/2016
I like how it was written - in third person perspective. Gave it a more painful, longing feel to it, because it feels as if she's telling herself she HAS to be this way, and she HAS to accept it, not that she has accepted it; she wants to explore, but her disability is a huge hurdle, but she doesn't understand that.

You practically gave a character sketch of Ariana. I liked how she referred to Gerret as Yellow Boy. Good job.
RomyNotSchneider chapter 1 . 12/15/2013
heartbreaking and utterly utterly beautiful, made me cry so hard. you are one of the best writers around, I am SO jealous! thank you for posting this masterpiece.
thepapergirl chapter 1 . 9/27/2013
I'm so sorry for kind of creepily reviewing all your harry potter fics, but I really enjoy your style of writing. It's surreal and enthralling- you're very talented!
JustlikeWater chapter 1 . 4/21/2013
Never reaf an arianna POV before, but I must say, you really REALLY did an excellent job here. Actually, excellent is too mere a word to describe your writing. Perfect perhaps? Flawless? Eiyher way, you captured her voice so accurately, it was as if she was the one writing. Amazing amazing amazing.
paper parasols chapter 1 . 3/8/2011
I have loved Ariana for the quite a bit of time - and this was perfect. She almost fits what I always imagined her as: the fact she's aware is all the more lovely. It gives Ariana a sense of humanity. and my heart breaks for her.
Jemennuie chapter 1 . 1/12/2011
Lovely writing style and perspective, that perfectly captures Ariana.
deleted2012 chapter 1 . 1/24/2010
I think you managed her perspective very very well.

x Smaginn
Rayless Night chapter 1 . 9/9/2009
Interesting. Hard perspective to write from, but you handle it well. I like how you slip more lucid commentary - "(No use in wishing...)" into the jumble. And though it's disjointed, the reader can still follow what's going on. The second person perspective often doesn't work well in stories, but here, I think it's great; nice work. :)


1. You have her refer to him as Albus once, though she's been calling him Al everywhere else.

2. I feel that you go overboard on the italics. I can see you're doing it for effect, but by the end of the story, italics have been used so much that they hardly carry any weight.

3. This isn't a crit, more like a question, but why did she run to Albus? Why him instead of Kendra or Aberforth?
verity candor chapter 1 . 9/1/2009
Wow. Nice writing. Really.
Expecting Rain chapter 1 . 8/19/2009
This was very sad! So of course what that means is that I liked it. You've captured Ariana perfectly.
Angelfirenze chapter 1 . 8/5/2009
There are so many feelings displayed here that it's actually difficult for me to enunciate how they've affected me.
Emily92 chapter 1 . 8/2/2009
That was so very Ariana like and beautifully written. Great work :).
Quothia chapter 1 . 7/31/2009
Absolutely adored it. Perfect! You've captured Ariana so well. Well done!
An-Jelly-Ca chapter 1 . 7/12/2009
Wow, this was really good, and a nice insight into Ariana's head. Nice work.
Pray for me. Pray chapter 1 . 7/7/2009
Wonderfully written, perfectly rendered. It fits my image of Ariana perfectly, so *applause*! Although I'm quite curious about the title, why did you title it 'water'?
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