|Reviews for Nobility|
| 4th Chaos Emerald chapter 16 . 7/29
I want to cry... this story is so amazing but it hasn't been updated since 2013. ((
I MADE AN ENDING FOR MYSELF! Until/if Dieuwtjin updates, this will keep me satisfied. I hope y'all like. (OH, AND THERE ARE NOBILITY SPOILERS BELOW. DON'T READ IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE STORY YET.) sorry I know it's long
Yuri gets some super-cool blastion from the scholar, then he RACES back to Aspio to deliver it to Estelle. BAM! Estelle learned Resurrection! (in my mind, it works like the Skills you get from using weapons, or the Tomes you get in Skyrim, y'know?)
Estelle still isn't okay with Flynn, but she doesn't want his blood on her hands, so she revives him. Juuuuuust barely. He's out of the fight for a while and has some brain issues (irritability, memory loss, light-headedness, etc- his brain hasn't had enough O2), but this just spurs Yuri to become an even better fighter to protect Flynn. BUT! The Aque Blastia. How does it get back to Zaphias?
GLAD YOU ASKED! Judith is still in Aspio. You know what that means? At any given moment, Team Vesperia is only one short blackmail away from using Baul. Yuri could dig up something about standing warrants for her arrest.
SO, they're in Zaphias. They park Baul out back while Ristelle runs into the lower quarter to replace the Aque Blastia. They manage to avoid the guards thanks to the help of Tom's gang. (Kylie, by the way, is mostly recovered from her run-in with the fuzz. She just has trouble catching her breath sometimes.)
As they run out of the city, Ristelle sees the Royal Guard camp all in a murmur. Baul and Judith left in the night. No surprise is the issue of returning to Aspio unnoticed...
...which they don't. The guard is on high alert, and reinforcements from Deidon Hold are incoming. Estelle and Yuri have to stealthily infiltrate the city to reclaim Flynn from the hospital, where he was still recovering. It's all good, though - Estelle decides to forgive Yuri for pressuring her earlier, and even admits to herself that maybe, MAYBE, she could grow to love Yuri. (Spoiler alert: she will. Happy endings.)
Anyway, there's lots of exploring that goes on, and eventually they 'just happen' to find Barbos off the coast of Capua Nor. He mocks Yuri, only giving vague jokes as tips of where to find Ioder. Lucky for Team Vesperia, Barbos's big ol' iron fist makes for a handy anchor, so in a moment of triumph, Flynn knocks him overboard to meet his fate.
With Nan's tracking skills, they eventually find the Red Eye Mansion, where Ioder is being held. It's conspicuous as heck. Karol and Repede scout ahead, and actually manage to loose Ioder from his cell. He's in bad shape, though, and makes a lot of noise in his movement. When the two are detected, Repede makes a break for it to inform Yuri's squad of Ioder and Karol's location. They get out, but there's still the issue of Dein Nomos.
Yuri searches for Clint, eventually finding him in Dahngrest, where Clint insists the time for the duel has come. It's close, but Yuri manages to incapacitate Clint, then gives him that spiel about how life isn't worth throwing away (think what Lloyd tells Kratos at the final seal). So Clint reveals that the Don had Dein Nomos all along, as a parting gift from Lloyd's father. (They were buddies, but Lloyd Sr. passed away shortly after the war.)
The Don tries to keep the sword, but is impressed by Yuri's loyalty to his friends and opposition to corruption, and eventually gives up the sword. Yuri hands it off to Ioder, who takes it back to Zaphias to reinstate imperial rule. With Flynn's advisement, Ioder removes corruption from the government, starting at Cumore and Alexei and ending at the creepy knights that wanted after Estelle.
Meanwhile, Karol and Nan withdraw from the Hunting Blades to form a 'protector's guild,' of sorts, who act as diplomats and watchmen between the guilds and the empire. Nan still doesn't like Karol too much, but she respects him now, which is all he ever asked for.
Rita returns to Aspio as soon as Ioder removes the corrupt police force, and from there she launches an expedition to find out what Judith meant by 'dangerous blastia.' Sequel, maybe?
Sodia and the Knights do their thing. The Royal Guard is entrusted with protecting the royal family as well as his subjects, so they patrol ALL parts of Zaphias with a vigilance. The lower quarter finally has some of the peace of mind it needed.
Yuri and Estelle, meanwhile, find an 'honest living' with the New Empire. They move from city to city, searching for evidence of corruption or injustice. This way, Yuri is living up to the honorable Lowell name that serves his country, while both he and the woman he loves get to protect people. That's the dream, is it not?
Anyway, this was all very rushed, but I hope someone will see it and feel better about the cliffhanger. Please come back, Dieuwtjin! We miss you and you rock!
| SonicAnime2010 chapter 16 . 2/27
Dramatic, funny... a great balance between the serious aspects of the game this is based on and the original concepts and ideas you're introducing.. to be honest, when I looked at Yuri and Estelle in this one, especially a chapter or 2 before hand, I was reminded of Luke and Tear from Abyss.. the way they interacted... anyways moving on.. serious chapter.. cliffhanger much. I look forward to more.
| technicolortardis chapter 4 . 1/30
I'm enjoying this thus far, but I have a few things that I wanna mention: Why are there "elders" in the lower quarter? It's not like the lower quarter to put anyone above anyone else, because they already suffer as the lowest of the low and don't like the classism they have to deal with, so it doesn't make any sense for them to have a self-imposed class system. The Lower Quarter seems to prize themselves on their equality because the other two quarters of the game we're privy to are not (though the Public Quarter is reasonably friendly if you talk to the NPCs at the start of the game, they're still a higher class). Hanks is never shown to be their leader, though he's someone they all listen to, as they do with Yuri.
Second- Elder Hanks, Elder Sarah, Prince Ioder, Prince Yuri, Captain Cumore, Captain Schwann. You're supposed to capitalise the titles, not just the names. Not when talking about the title ("the elders", "the captain", "the prince"), but when preceding the name like a title, they're supposed to be capitalised.
There is no real notes about the monetary system, but in Tales of the Abyss Luke says this about Gald: "It's not gold, so I'd forgotten all about it", so either he means Gald is not made of gold, or he was referring to the shape. Gald is always measured in coins. That's why it makes the noise it makes whenever you get paid for a guild job or from selling things, and the EX Dungeon in Vesperia shows Fake Gald to be rendered as coins. Gald are coins, there aren't any notes for it (and there shouldn't be- there aren't any banks). Keep in mind it's an RPG setting, where notes aren't common. If you look at the descriptions of Karol's bags and one of the key items in Tales of the Abyss (the Magical Pouch), bags in the game have a magic of their own where they're bigger on the inside, and presumably lighter, too, seeing as Karol never complains that his bag is heavy even when you have a lot of weapons and armour and key items, not even in a skit. Money bags presumably follow this direction because they use coins as their currency.
I think I really am having fun with this story so far, though. (:
| GrayIceEternal chapter 16 . 3/3/2015
Hopefully you are still attempting to work on and eventually update those chapters. Quite a unique twist on the story I must say, with impressive ideas on how to keep personalities similar now that backgrounds have been exchanged for some characters. Even some of the OCC instances fit in based on their new experiences,
There is one matter that confuses me though. It can be seen that you are trying and succeeding to incorporate then original plot line as in destinations and such, but if you are keeping that part accurate, then going back to the new character backgrounds, wouldn't Yuri be the one with healing powers because it was royalty who wee descendants of the Children of the Full Moon? Now that Estelle is a commoner, Yuri has that power in his bloodline although it may not suite his personality. Is there a specific reason for doing this?
Also, if you need help with anything, I'll be glad to help if possible.
| Glon Morski chapter 16 . 8/21/2014
Well, I usually avoid 'Romance' tagged tics, since I'm not exactly fond of any pairing in this fandom (romantically involved, anyway). I haven't seen any hints in the game and I liked the platonic relationships just the way they were (although admittedly, there was ONE single moment where I could see hints of YurixEstelle if I squinted - a lot), so when I see just how many romance tics are out there, and the way they're written, I can only think that people seriously need to get their minds out of the gutter.
But anyway, that's beside the point.
I have to admit, I wasn't quite certain what I was expecting when I started reading this. Writing a fanfic when the two main characters switch backgrounds myself (though for another fandom, not ToV), I guess I expected something somewhat similar. And pan, was I off. Not that that's a bad thing, I just expected a little less of an AU. Still, I like the way thing were handled thus far, and while it's still weird to read a Yuri who's NOT a walking definition of 'badass' (you can't deny that he was 'kind of' like that in the game), I can't deny that your take on the characters is not only believable, but also very well handled. So no complaints on that front.
With characterization and overall impression out of the way, time to focus on the plot itself. Still, no complaints. I can't really have any about the plot itself, because if I disliked THAT, then I really shouldn't be reading, right? ;) But I do have to wonder how exactly you plan on wrapping everything up in roughly 3 chapters... I mean, if I look at the game, then the problem with the Blood Alliance aside, there's still the Entelexeia, Zaude, the Adephagos... although something tells me half of it won't be appearing in this fic, since you obviously aren't going by the game script. Not that that's a bad thing, I was just surprised at first, since I had expected something close to the game. I'm not complaining, though :3 Except maybe the fact that I can be sure if you decide to finish this fic at all, considering that it's been close to a year since the last update :( I do hope you simply got caught up in RL and didn't in fact decide to drop this fic. It'd be a real shame. And waste. This fic definitely deserves to be finished :)
On another note, it's interesting that Estelle is a commoner, but still seems to have her power as a Child of the Full Moon, even though that power was supposed to be in the imperial blood line in the game. As I had originally expected this fic to be slightly closer to the actual game, I've been wondering how you'd explain that and how you'd play with it, but now that I see that I shouldn't be looking to the game for comparisons, I'm even more interested.
Focusing slightly more on this chapter, I have to say that I kind of wanted to slap Estelle at the beginning of the first scene. Not so much because she refused to help Flynn, as many might have thought, but because of her thoughts before Yuri even knocked on her door. I mean, up until now, I always thought she saw Yuri as Yuri. Sure, she knew he was a prince and the thought was in the back of her mind in every fight and everything, since he had to be protected and all. But when she interacted with him, I believed she treated him just as she would everyone else. The way she acted around him didn't imply anything else, at least. And then her thoughts in this chapter happened and I was staring at them incredulously, while recalling what Yuri told Estelle a few chapters back: 'I didn't matter as a person. Only my title did.' - and I sooooo wanted Estelle to realize that at this very moment, she was doing EXACTLY THE SAME THING. She's thinking of Yuri, but sees only 'Prince Yuri', if not just a 'Prince'. She even admits in her thoughts that she should 'give him a chance as a person' (or, well she asks herself if she should, but that's not really the point), which implies that up until now, she hadn't REALLY seen him as a person - maybe partially, but she STILL saw his title/social standing above everything else. And when I realized that and remembered that Yuri seemed to think she didn't, and that he considered her a friend as much as he did with Flynn (who DEFINITELY sees Yuri as a normal, human being, and not just a Prince, even if he HAS to think of his friend's social status at times), I really wanted to hit her over the head. Preferably a few times. Preferably so that it'd hurt. A lot. Maybe that wasn't exactly the reaction you were going for (it probably wasn't), but that was how I interpreted her thoughts and I just couldn't react otherwise.
But other than Estelle annoying the hell out of me in one scene, I really enjoyed the fic so far. I hope to see an update soon :3 Or at least a PM reassuring me that, even though another update can't be promised in the near future, the fic hadn't been abandoned ;)
| Zylette chapter 16 . 4/13/2014
I hope you continue this again! It was a great chapter D
| YokoYua chapter 16 . 1/6/2014
I was reluctant to read this at first, since I typically stay on canon fics, but the number of favorites and follows on this story was very persuasive. Right from the beginning, you did not disappoint. I absolutely love the way You adapted Yuri into his roguish price role, he's perfectly in character, and his conversations with Repede are hilarious. Flynn, also is perfect- and by the gods I hope you update soon because I don't know if I will be able to stomach Sodia's reaction to his dead body (unless Estelle can somehow revive him...Ah the cliffhangers!). That entire scene between Estelle and Sodia was very heartwarming. Your actions scenes are definitely good too- I usually get bored with intense battles, but your constant changing of perspectives helped to keep the pacing interesting. If I had any criticism, I feel like in the earlier chapters a bit too much time had been spent on new characters, namely the Red Eyes and Gwen. However, I get how their involvement and development helped the story later. Admittedly, Estelle took a while to get used to, but I in no way hold that against you. Just by putting her into the lower quarter, it changed a huge part of her characterization from the game. I think you did a pretty damn good job creating a new Estelle, that is still Estelle (if that makes sense). It is only natural that she acts more grown up in this AU, and focusing on her selflessness was a good choice to keep her in character. In terms of plot progression: bravo, brava, and three thumbs up because I could not stop reading. The castle infiltration felt a little slow, but the moment that Sleep Aer sphere went off the entire story blew up with it. I mean that in the absolute best way. Like wonderful.
I know I just jumped around a bunch cuz I just read all of this and probably shouldn't have waited for the end to review...but great job! I feel like I shouldn't put any criticism in because I enjoy this so much (and I repeat- please please continue, even if you already updated 2 months ago) but I also feel criticism is also good for any writer, especially one as good as yourself.
Overall: the new relationships and expansions of certain characters are great- primarily Sodia and Yuri, the plot is intense and refreshingly different from canon, and the battle scenes are top notch- partly due to the fact of the rapidly changing perspectives that give the reader the while feel of the action. Wonderful work!
| sanxian chapter 16 . 1/1/2014
Found this fic on tvtropes fanficrecs, read it in one go. This is a very nice approach to a role reversal fic. Please keep up the good work!
| ViciousBluesummers chapter 16 . 12/21/2013
Got bored, found a random ToV fic, and read it all in the past two days. Seriously, update soon; you've got a new reader in me.
| FallenAngelCyril chapter 16 . 12/19/2013
What a marvelous story! I'm a bit sad about the slow updates, but I definitely understand the difficulties. I'm an anal obsessive re-drafter, too.
If I really had any complaints it's that it feels like the story is less directed now that there are so many more POVs than just Estelle and Yuri. I'm not sure if I like that as much, but overall the story is quite amazing and I hope you continue.
| Aoriki Matsumaru chapter 16 . 11/27/2013
I finally caught up to this story and each chapter has put me on the edge of my seat. The moments with Yuri and Estelle brought me great joy and including the kiss scene...best moment. Now in this chapter has also put me on edge, heated argument with my favorite pairing was great but also sad. I think the scar on Estelle maybe the reason for what happen between Flynn and her...that's my theory though. I look forward for the next chapter.
| Soanevalcke chapter 16 . 11/23/2013
J'attends la suite avec impatience.
| SSVD chapter 16 . 10/27/2013
Wow, I'm so glad you updated! :) I never check my e-mail so I didn't get an alert for the update from this website and I just happened to be like "Hey, wonder if that story updated?" and it's one of those things you don't actually expect to happen, so when I saw it had updated I did a double-take and went "...Wait it really did? AWESOME!" haha. I'm really glad you wrote it, this is really fun to read. It's one of the few fanfics that feel well-written enough that they aren't just relying on the stuff the original story already did to be interesting. The writing is fun to read and it feels like you could easily write a fun plot without touching the Vesperia world, which adds to the "anything can happen here" feeling.
On to the chapter itself, that was great. If I can make a comment(hope it doesn't come off as too negative, I loved the chapter) I think my only complaint is that the relationship feels a bit too one sided in terms of commitment-I mean Estelle has done a lot for Yuri and vice-versa, but in terms of self-awareness and maturity it feels like Yuri is too much in the lead in terms of putting himself out there, making an effort and getting burned. I mean in the end he is the one who would be asking too much, but that's what I think makes the dynamic too one-sided. Estelle would need to take a few leaps of faith to be with him, but he's so used to leaping around that to him there's not much of a conflict outside of her rejecting him.
I think the dynamic could have some better tension if the roles were reversed at some point, like if for example Yuri did something mildly insane/dangerous for her without her knowing and was too prideful to accept any thankfulness for it because he would mistake it for pity. I think that's another thing that I think is a bit off, but that's more on my personal taste than an actual criticism-I think that even if Yuri is...well, Yuri, living in a castle would have made him a bit more reserved in regards to his pride a bit, especially after he got burned so often.
On to the things I did like about the chapter, I did like the scene with Estelle and Sodia. It established a lot about their characters and motivations, which was great. Also, I was caught completely off guard by the last sentence. That was a great cliffhanger, not just in the way you placed it but also because the tone of the story so far makes it really, really hard to tell whether you are going to kill him off or not. Both could be great for the plot, though I think if he really died it would be a bit difficult to buy Yuri still liking her(not impossible, mind you, just a bit difficult).
I'm not sure if the implication here is that Estelle was sent as Yuri's sole protector as an attempt to get him killed, but either way that bit was really interesting. I'm looking forward to seeing how the story turns out!
Oh, and if you could PM the original ending to me I would love to read it!
| PurpleTardis chapter 2 . 10/8/2013
OH! they just tried to kill me! "stabs" ... well, better heal them now XD
| PrinnyMuchIt chapter 16 . 10/7/2013
After reading all the chapters up till now, I really love this story and your work. It's a great, fresh idea that makes this story better than the actual ToV game. Since the first chapter, I didnt care ass much for the roles of Yuri and Estelle being switch, but rather the in-depth you have in these characters. It tempted me to always keep reading till the end. I really hope to read more of your future works.