|Reviews for Storm Warning|
| Grimlock3 chapter 7 . 2/5/2011
(this story looks completed to me but isn't marked as such?)
It's always nice to get Mass Effect stories from 'outside' persons so to speak. I had to smile when Hayley gave Kaiden directions to Hackett's office :) It did make me wonder if Kaiden survived in this story?
Hayley did end up on the Normandy after all, must have been fun for her, lotsa tech to learn :) I think Wrex will respect her if he hears what she did on Torfan, krogan tend to like such stuff after even if Hayley didn't.
It's nice to see Hayley got out of the marines just in time. Gotta wonder if she heard the news of Normandy's demise. Hopefully not, 'cos I wish her a relaxed and nice life outside the army. She surely has earned it!
| Vshard chapter 7 . 10/7/2009
Yay - finally found time to finish this so I can move on to the others. In the last chapter, transitioning was a bit rough, but I think you cleared it up nicely with breaks in this one. Nice ending and yeah... I imagine Shep would be a little unhinged too. Cheers.
| Vshard chapter 5 . 10/7/2009
Well, to add another review to the stack here...
In the beginning of this - the past/present switches were a little jarring and I had to go back and forth over them to figure out exactly what happened where/when at times, but not so bad.
For what it's worth, your brand of romance here is kind of refreshing. It's got plenty of delicious tension and is wonderfully far away from fluff. Somehow you made a simple drink a whole event - go you.
Oh and nice touch with Kyle - it's interesting to see Shep from the other side. :)
| Vshard chapter 4 . 10/6/2009
Morbid and creepifying is right. That was beautiful in a very sick way. Usually, I devour stories, but this one is sort of like a really good ice cream sundae. Each taste is satisfying then you look back in the bowl and go... oh good there's more. Suffice it to say, I really like what you've done here. It felt very ... Bushwacked/Miranda ... without being them and nicely folded into the ME verse. Very nice job :) Can't wait to read all the rest you have here about Storm.
| Vshard chapter 3 . 9/17/2009
Ah, the beautiful details. This story continues to make me feel right in there with the crew and hell if I don't want that holo-treadmill background :p
Gallipoli huh? Interesting comparison.
| Vshard chapter 2 . 8/26/2009
I'm sorry I only get to read these chapters sporadically as they are so involved, but really just brilliant. I love all of the small game touches you integrate in without drawing attention to the fact they are from the game - like the weapon and armor models. Usually when I see the word Sentinel or Infiltrator in a story it kind of breaks me out of it, but you did a good job making it sound like a believable specialization rather than arbitrary game naming.
I absolutely loved the Tokyo interlude at the end of this chapter and so much more. Yep. I'm afraid I have no criticisms for you on this. You filled in all the gaps where my mind went 'but wait' ... the cancer for example. I'm looking forward to finishing this read :)
| Vshard chapter 1 . 7/29/2009
Alright, so far only through chapter one with no prequel having been read, but I'm really enoying this. The verb tenses so far give it a really unique flavor - much more in the moment. There's so much description packed into a flow that just moves along at the pace of imagination. Nice.
| Dr.Olga chapter 5 . 7/19/2009
I am loving this story! And I liked the romance, especially how you wrote Storm's inner turmoil, it's very good.
| sinvraal chapter 4 . 7/18/2009
I liked the slice-of-life details on board the larger ship, and the relationships between the crew. The little moment on the treadmills was sweet, but also adult.
One thing I found, the shifts in verb tense are a little bit jarring. It's mostly a clean cut between sections, but there were some instances where the tenses got switched within a section. It seems a little arbitrary. Maybe it works better as a distinguishing feature for flashbacks, or similarly 'out of context' moments like the Torfan flashback? Just a thought, nothing major.
I like Carver, he seems like a solid, no-nonsense vet who still cares about his team.
| sinvraal chapter 1 . 7/12/2009
I really enjoyed the cinematic intro, it was very effective at setting the stage. I also liked the politics of propaganda, very believable. Will we get to see her meet Shepard? I hope so.
Looking forward to more.
| Dr.Olga chapter 1 . 7/12/2009
I read Fade to Black, and really enjoyed it, so I'm excited to read some more about Hailstorm, cause I really liked that character. Great first chapter :)