|Reviews for Only Mortal|
| Cross the Sky chapter 1 . 5/25/2010
This was a lovely look at the relationship between Sed and Tolten! And you captured Tolten perfectly. And Sed's little digs at Tolten!
"I suppose all Uhran Kings also curl up in a pirate ship and take their clothes off too."
Favorite line, hands down! :D
| spiritualized chapter 1 . 4/14/2010
I really love your story! I'm playing the game right now, I'm almost at the end and I have to agree... Tolten's too cute! I don't get why people don't like him, I mean he's probably a bit annoying but I think his shyness is pretty funny and he's an interesting character.
You captured the relationships really well, be it Sed and Tolten or Sed and Seth! And I loved the descriptions, I could picture it all so well in my head, especially Tolten's slightly childish and naive imagination. XD Are you by any chance going to write another story with Tolten? I just saw you've got two others with Jansen, who is one of my favorites too. It's such a pity the LO fandom seems to be so small! And the few fanfics out there are always Jansen/Ming
I liked Tolten's thoughts about Gongora in your story, I really wonder about that... I'd like to think Gongora did care about him a bit (but his goal was more important, of course), as much as a villain such as he can care about someone, anyway. And I was so disappointed that after the whole group was together there was really hardly any support - like you said in your story, they don't seem to care/like each other much. They were all in small groups (Jansen Ming, the family, Seth Sed) and Tolten was pretty much alone, only interacting with Seth, Sed and Jansen a bit (well, more like getting teased by them p). I don't think he has talked directly with Kaim yet o.O And I was so looking forward to that ever since their first meeting in front of Gongora's mansion !
Anyway, great story! XD
| yaminoyume chapter 1 . 7/26/2009
Aww! I really loved it. :D You write beautifully. 3 I definitely enjoyed your portrayal of their friendship. :3
| Lord 0f Storms chapter 1 . 7/16/2009
Aww I love Tolten, and I love it when people write from his perspective! It's so sweet to read a scene between Tolten and Sed, which was so beautiful, like father and son. Even when Sed teased him, you can tell he cared - and he stuck up for him on a couple of occasions when Jansen picked on him. This is such a cute and heart-warming story! Well written too! Only thing is that somehow I can't imagine Tolten without his golden armour - it's like I think it's welded to him or something, hehe
| DawningStar chapter 1 . 7/14/2009
Confusion here: first you say it's Tolten/Sed, which is usually shorthand for a slash pairing, and then you mark it as gen friendship. If I were you I'd switch the summary to say Tolten and Sed, instead of slash.
I do love the friendship these two have during the game, so I was happy to find this not slash after all. Tolten's so sweet, and you got Sed just right.
Point of accuracy: Tolten didn't become king when his father died. His father established the republic and gave up ruling, after the queen's death, but for some time before he died. Tolten continued to live in the palace because the Council let him, but he didn't become king, and didn't really want to, until Gongora forced him into it. I think it adds additional depth to the character, knowledge that his father, while alive, for whatever reason chose not to let his son inherit the throne.
Sorry to pick! I can't help it.
I love the mention of Jansen arguing about hair, and poor seasick Tolten makes so much sense! And the last bit...Tolten so needs that encouragement. Excellent work, and I hope you'll keep writing Lost Odyssey.