Reviews for The Biggest Pretend
Ckorkows chapter 1 . 11/23/2015
((I fear you will be lost to me forever, Peter.)) Awe... Peter Pan is one of those tales as old as time that tugs at that special place in our hearts - at least it does for me. The child-like joy and adventurous spirit that permeates the original story is what keeps me coming back to it over and over again, and you summed it up in one wistful sentence. I know your last line about Wendy shutting the window was really impactful, but for me the winner in this chaper is this whisper into the night. It's so sweet.

In fact, this whole chapter was a lovely view at Wendy's conflicting thoughts about growing up. I especially liked the part where she used the bow as a symbol of her whole life changing in a single day. Today, it is appropriate, tomorrow, when she's officially a lady, it is not.

((Wendy giggled, unable to imagine her elegant mother... before realizing her family was next to be called.)) The SPAG and pacing/flow of this chapter was really good overall but this one line popped out to me. It sounds incomplete in my mind. I feel like there was an implied 'stopping when she realized' because giggling at her father's teasing is inappropriate for the setting. If I'm looking into that the right way I wish it was written that way.

Like I said, it looked pretty impeccable to me so I had to nitpick.

I have to admit that I am upset with you about James. I don't always swing by the Peter Pan portion of this site but when I do I am a very firm Peter/Wendy shipper. I don't know if that is where this fic is headed or the ultimate role James plays but why did you have to make him so darn likeable? I mean, between liking Wendy's outburst and the way he keeps tugging those cute curls... I don't want to like the kid but you sure sold him to me. :) Indeed, characterization was a shining point throughout this chapter. The fatherly teasing, the 'sick' little boys bouncing on their beds, and that nervous tic James has around Mr. Darlington, you really made the characters shine.

Thanks for a darling chapter in a fandom I probably should peruse more often.
Angel of Red Fire chapter 5 . 10/5/2013
I read all five of your chapters and I loved this story! I wish you would update, it's marvelous :)
AngelfromBeyondBelow chapter 5 . 8/16/2012
i love this story, you researched the play and the story well and i love the idea of lost boys being Peter's parents
Madam'zelleG chapter 1 . 4/11/2012
Gosh, it's been ages since I've read Peter Pan but you've brought the book flooding back! Nice job capturing the mood and style of the original story!

The way that you write Wendy really makes the entire chapter. She's absolutely perfect. You give us the perfect snapshot of how her life is changing. It's not an easy time in a girl's life and you've shown that beautifully.

This was a lovely chapter! I look forward to continuing! Thanks so much for this and well done!

Cheers!
HisDarkMaterialsrox chapter 3 . 10/6/2011
:D

please update? this is a fun little story :P
FindingStarlight chapter 5 . 10/3/2011
Wow! Just utterly and completely wow! This is so amazing and beautifully written that even those first few chapters have me hooked. Everything from your style of writing to the characterization of Peter is absolutely perfect. But I see that it has been a very long time since you updated this. Have you abandoned it? I hope not. I hope that you find the inspiration to continue with this. It would be such a shame to see a story with so much potential die.
the birds were flown chapter 5 . 8/3/2011
Yoooh! Why'd you have to stop here? :(

It's a good fic, I'll say that. Although, I imagined the characters from the 2003 Live action movie to be present instead of the Disney one, still, a great fic. Sad to see it not updated after a long time...

But just like Peter waited for Wendy (on other fics anyway), I shall endlessly wait for an update :')
Kisa Black chapter 5 . 3/16/2011
Ahhhh! do you want to kill me? i was getting soooo into this story! update soon please!
TacoTomodachi chapter 1 . 3/13/2011
This is so well written - and it's the first chapter and I'm already in love! I'm just glad that I found this when you already had 5 chapter out because I don't have to wait for them. :) Can't wait to read the rest.
claire chapter 5 . 1/17/2011
ok i am on a peter pan craze right now! i literally read ever wendy peter story out there that fin my mood witch by the way was a lot and this has to be one of the best once i simply adore it and really really really hope that you write more wow i cant get over how great it is and just looking at the comments it makes me think that i am not the only one that wants more of this absolutely fabulous story so please please please keep on writing! you have a real talent and i hope you share more of it with the world wow wow wow just please keep writing! i liked this story so much that i have absolutely zero criticism and that is saying something i am a very harsh person when it comes to reviewing story's and wow! wow lol i wrote a lot but as you can tell i really really care! also just so you know i am not usually this strange if you think this is strange lol i just hate when story's i want to read are not finished so please write on!
kate chapter 1 . 1/17/2011
oh this was wonderful please update soon it would make my day :)
page chapter 5 . 1/15/2011
omg i really love it please write more
Hazel Fowl chapter 5 . 12/5/2010
Hello It is me again

Are you working on you're story

I must say your story is astonishingly fantastic

So please update
ArtemisFowl'sDaughter chapter 5 . 11/22/2010
Your stories are simply fabulous and I hope that you will be updating very soon.
head in the clouds 14 chapter 5 . 11/22/2010
Ooooh here comes Peter

Love it and can't wait for more :)
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