|Reviews for The Severance of Haruhi Suzumiya|
| uzukun7 chapter 9 . 6/1/2010
another great chapter, but i felt like some parts were rushed. kyon went from everything going according to plan to everything falling apart at the seams. and then everything isnt so bad anymore with a ride by tsuruya. i mean i guess i expected an esper standoff almost to the same degree of the time travelers a couple of chapters ago. but the end was absolutely the best part of the fic with haruhi already figuring out that kyon was john smith. i really hope youre able to update this really soon. laterz
| Durandall chapter 9 . 5/31/2010
I know it's supposed to be a real 'zinger' for the last line, but that suddenly makes Haruhi extremely unsympathetic. She's mad at Kyon because she left him to look for 'someone else', KNOWING that it was Kyon when they broke up? I was enjoying the story so far, but that sudden reveal felt ... well ... forced, to say the least, and the newly fabricated dramatic tension comes at the cost of sympathy for Haruhi as a character.
Personally, I hope Kyon just walks away from her and she snaps out of it by realizing that she's being an utter child, instead of heaping more wangst on Kyon for doing his best. Seriously, the girl needs to take a step forward, considering everything Kyon has done for her so far.
I'm guessing you just wanted to go against the cliche of the reveal of Kyon being John Smith being monumental, but the manner it was done, added to Haruhi being so angsty... It leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I want to see this Haruhi go off to her own world and not bother Kyon anymore, and I doubt that was your intent. :(
Anyway. Everything right up to that final scene and its twist was great. Really great.
| Arty d'Arc chapter 9 . 5/31/2010
Lovely chapter. Lots of work, but the end result is truly just fantastic.
| HarimaHige chapter 9 . 5/31/2010
what a surprising end. realy great chapter.
I want to quote a great person to show my appreciation:
"Greg Zerich , before I go I just wanna tell you — you were fantastic...absolutely fantastic...and d'you know what? So was I!" (The Doctor)
| superstarultra chapter 9 . 5/31/2010
I got one word to say about this, Greg: Awesome, awesome, awesome! Okay, it's three, but they are all the same, but I really don't care at the moment.
On the new chapter, I really enjoyed everything you put in here, the cameos by the other characters (spoiler-free for those guys who read the review section first), and the ending really caught me off guard. A real shocker to me.
Congratulations on making the fantastic update with Arty. It was worth the wait, I can assure you. :)
I'll stop gushing now... except for the next chapter.
| funvince chapter 9 . 5/30/2010
That's quite an unexpected reaction from Haruhi! I'm in suspense for what happens next! You also did a good job in clearing up some of the concerns I'd had in previous chapters with a few plot points so good job on that.
| grey mage chapter 9 . 5/30/2010
you just blew my mind with that last sentence. what if that night wasn't as dark as kyon thought? what if, she's as smart as he think she is? her mind is as sharp as a steel trap.
you might wanna make a new story, of if she went looking for kyon the next day after tanabata and saw a little boy who loved the things she loved. a stalker haruhi who would watch this boy grow in to the disillusioned and sarcastic present kyon.
| Five Centimeters chapter 8 . 4/17/2010
I cannot wait until you update again. Although I am sad that I did not discover this story until it was almost over, I think it is brilliantly written. Everyone is in character (especially Kyon) and I really could believe that this is how book ten ended and book eleven started.
For starters, I love how you characterized Fujiwara, Sasaki, and Asahina-san (big). I have always thought that Asahina-san(big)was not all that she appeared (even in the beginning of the light novels) and for you to give her a realistic portrayal is so epically amazing. She's a hard character to pin down: coy but innocent appearing, intelligent but devious, caring yet cold. It makes you wonder what could have possibly happened to sweet Mikuru to make her into someone who uses others like chess pieces. Which is why I love that Asahina-san (medium) [lawls, Kyon] saves them. I started singing the Mikuru theme song at that point.
I always feel bad for Koizumi and Nagato even though I'm a Haruhi x Kyon shipper. It's like, they never stood a chance you know? Although who it's harder for I'm not sure. Nagato who's never experienced real emotions before Kyon, or Koizumi who probably could have swayed Haruhi back at the beginning if he really wanted to, but didn't because he knew what the outcome had to be. (For that same reason I feel equally terrible for Mikuru) The way the character's conflicting emotions were played and inter weaved sent chills down my spine.
But most of all I love Kyon. This whole situation is so ironic it's painful to watch. Loosing Haruhi to himself? That really is a situation I could see happening in the novels. But what I love the most about him is his passion. So rarely do we get to see Kyon show his more fierce passionate side for those he cares about. Usually he is hysterically apathetic and sarcastic, which while they make good traits for a reluctant hero, do not so much make a great boyfriend. However Kyon does have that passionate side which he only uses when his loved ones are in danger. And here we can clearly see it. I'm not sure which line I love more: when Kyon decides that he won't redo his visit to Haruhi as John Smith, or when he lets Koizumi know that he doesn't care about what happens to him-he'll go to hell and back for Haruhi even if that means he dies or she never wants him again-but as long as she is safe. I think what wins however, is when Kyon decides not to return to Haruhi when she's upset, and that even though it's killing him that he can't be with her what's killing him more is the fact that she'll eventually get hurt when she can never find John Smith.
This . . . there are no words to describe this story. I have read it several times when I come home after a bad day and need some Kyon-esq humor to cheer me up. (which you also do brilliantly by the way, keeping your story hysterical without drawing away from all the drama and adventure) I'll be sad when this ends but I am also glad that I'll be able to read this story over and over again. I could never get bored of it. :)
| blackdragon0 chapter 1 . 4/12/2010
Wow, beautiful plot twist. This has much potential, methinks.
| Dracobolt chapter 8 . 4/8/2010
Allow me to help you break 100 reviews. You certainly deserve it for such a quality story. I enjoyed the section where Kyon asked Haruhi out, and nice reference back to Haruhi's dislike of being asked out over the phone. Also, Asahina-san (medium) was a nice surprise. Made me happy when she said that everyone from the past was her friend. Well, I can't wait for the next chapter!
| nukerjsr chapter 8 . 3/30/2010
I think any doubt I had for this story had slowly melted away upon reading this chapter. You have definitely mastered the art of using time travel within the Haruhi-Universe. Many people use the IDTE or Espers for their general plot point, but you really, REALLY use the Time Travel to it's full potential, touching upon laws and using new technology. Many people skip that.
I really enjoyed how this chapter came together. The way you worked in this new Mikuru and Yuki into the story just plain works. And you also used a bitter, angry Mikuru who used her power to teach a lesson to Haruhi. It's a perfect way to look into the question-ability of her existence and the (possible) duality of Mikuru's character. It's hard to find a story that really uses that in a great direction.
| JonBob0008 chapter 8 . 3/25/2010
Ah, good ol' Nagato. Always there in a pinch.
As expected, you've delivered quality far exceeding this fics review count. I was left wondering how they were going to get out of the mess they were in, and you surprised me good. Also the scene of Kyon's dream was really cute.
The one complaint I have is that the word "though" got mixed up with "thought" in the first few paragraphs.
Anyway, I eargerly await the next chapter. It's too bad that this fic will end soon. It was a great contribution to the fandom.
| funvince chapter 8 . 3/23/2010
That's quite a cliffhanger you got there! And to make a Goldilocks reference, Asahina (medium) is just right. She seems to combine the best of the other two (small's compassion and big's competence).
I'm curious as to how this can possibly end well for any of the characters. Is it inevitable that Asahina will grow to become cynical and jaded? Will Kyon really get away with defying the time travelers? How will Haruhi get over her John Smith obsession?
So many questions! Update soon!
| funvince chapter 7 . 3/23/2010
Your Asahina (big) makes a fascinating villain even though I think her characterization is somewhat in conflict with the confident, mature woman of the novels who was nostalgic about her days with the SOS Brigade. Possibilities for this difference are: 1) she was acting then 2) she's been brainwashed 3) the stress of this situation has made her focus more on the negatives than the positives of her past.
And the Sneering Bastard paints a rather bleak future though he's obviously biased and I take what he says with a grain of salt. Yeah, dystopic futures are interesting but they're also depressing. Why would Asahina (small) want to protect or go back to such a time? On the other hand, I liked that you integrated time travel into the fabric of that future society so that it's not just a tool that a bunch of scientists and historians use. That means there's more than academic interest at stake in making sure time travel continues to exist, and it gives Fujiwara a real motive for what he's doing.
The plan to 'kill' John Smith was a very clever one, but it's good that Kyon finally realized that it's one that he can't really be a part of. This was a very well-written and exciting chapter.
| funvince chapter 5 . 3/22/2010
Having Yuki's illness simply be the result of a misunderstanding is brilliant. And fervor in her talk with Kyon was very well-written. And to make an Evangelion reference, there was a little bit of a Shinji-Rei moment when Yuki was talking about how easily she could replaced and Kyon getting upset over it.
I tend to forget that Kyon also once shared a love of the supernatural. That was a big motivating factor in why he reverted the world back in the 4th novel. Sasaki's observations on that point made a lot of sense.