Reviews for Rainbow Zebra: An ode to Vampire Bella
bhr chapter 1 . 8/5/2012
Really cool story! Nothing I imagined in terms of Edward and Bella having reversed roles, but I really enjoyed reading it :)

I liked how things weren't as similar as the twilight version, where Bella did things out of order, of that makes sense, and then the zebra thing sounds like a lot of fun, although as a human I probably couldn't actuall do that lol.
I hate angst chapter 1 . 12/5/2011
aww it was very cute and funny! I love it!
Captain Lycan chapter 1 . 9/13/2011
How in God's name do you do it?

"Of three things, he was certain. One: Bella Cullen was not human. Two: He was irrevocably and hopelessly in love with her. Three: He was so proud that he didn't pee his pants in front of Bella." That line alone is worth the price of admission.

Human Edward is a hellavu lot more amusing then Human Bella. His obbsession with manga and his alternating between fearing Bella and being aroused by her is a load of fun to read.

But that poor zebra, what did the great striped horses ever do to you? Haha Peace out!
Renaisty chapter 1 . 5/26/2011
Good story! I loved it wahen they painted the zebra! Great idea!
Shadowmaiden3 chapter 1 . 12/16/2010
*twitch* My brain...

I like it, are you going to write more? _

PS You're right, it hasn't been seen until you give it a try.
sweettwilightvamps13 chapter 1 . 10/24/2010
ROFLMAO! This is soo much better than the original! And I just LoVE vampire hunter D! I really liked that story! Make MORE! Or, or uhhhh...*goes away to make up A good threat* *two hours later* or I'll tell my mommy that you're being mean!( that was said in an extremely annoying pouty girlish voice) Bur really, you have to,, like make more, because this is like so totally awesome!


The Fourth Bride chapter 1 . 2/3/2010
Okay, I have to admit, after arguing with you for a while on a Dracula forum, I kinda hated your guts. But this story slightly redeems my opinion of you.

That. Is. Fracking. HILARIOUS.

Vlad x Mina 4 eva.

EclipsedbyJacob chapter 1 . 10/17/2009
You are a strange, strange man. What's up with the rainbow zebra?
Blondejoke101 chapter 1 . 8/7/2009
Hey, it's actually my turn to review you! :D

Truely a great story, Edward was a little OOC but it fits nicely for this story. I like the stuff about Manga, it made him sound more of our age. I totally believe he would be into it.

Painting Zebras was a nice way to show the uses of Bella's abilities, a very nice way, although I feel kinda bad for the zebra.

My favorite line was "Forks High was an abysmal collection of temporary buildings which housed students that possessed undersized brains due to fetal alcohol syndrome." It really reminds me of most of the other characters from Twilight. Tyler, Lauren, Mike, and Jessica to name a few. And it shows how bored and pessimistic Edward is.

I loved the story, and regret that I haven't read the Hellsing series to be able to read some of your other works (that aren't rated M).

taylorjsomeday chapter 1 . 7/26/2009
Wow. That was simultaneously hilarious, completely random, and very good writing style. I enjoyed it very much, and I wish you had more stories for Twilight.

Just to let you know, I'm TG, the author of "The Witness." I have to say that your reviews for my story are the most insightful reviews I've ever had, and reading them pretty much makes my day whenever I receive them. I figured that if I could enjoy your reviews so immensely, then I must read some of your stories to see if they are equally as perceptive. I'm glad to see that I was not disappointed in your writing. Like I said, I just wish you had more Twilight stories so I could read more.

Keep writing, both stories and your awesome reviews. :)

Haissan chapter 1 . 7/24/2009
Wow dude, I wonder who else did a role reversal fiction, this is amazing. You've captured a piece of Meyer's work in here... I mean holy crap. That aside there were some grammatical errors you missed in beta phase. Other than this *shivers* when are we going to get more story from you?
Shadows' Nightmare chapter 1 . 7/21/2009
I have read only a few chapters of Twilight, and from what I can tell yours is DEFINITELY a MILLION times better than the original book.

This fic much better written, it has more depth, the characters have more personality (i.e. Edward being interested in manga), you've inserted parts of your soul to give the story more flavor, you have a great sense of humor, as always, the characters are more believable and agreeable, and... it's so much more intelligent! The paradise of Shangri-la, the Italian confession of "tua la cantante," everything!

I love how Edward is especially. In Twilight he had the personality of a cardboard box, yet you went and gave the Hollow Man a soul; interests and hobbies, personality quirks and a background, emotions and mistakes (“You’re a dhampire!” lol) Among most Twitards Edward Cullen is the standard of perfection for the male of the sex, but I like your Edward Cullen interpretation a million times more. :3

You took the entire pointless, mindless story of twilight and gave it intelligence and life! If Twilight had been half as well written as your fic, I would have joined the fandom long ago.

Great job Master of the Boot, a job well done. Your writing gets better and better as time goes on. I look forward to reading more from you in the future. :)
shallowswan chapter 1 . 7/20/2009
First things first I loved you down to earth, tell it al it is descriptions of the Cullens! :D As I always I love your description of Rosealie as a selfish, vapid harpy. Excellent call! And your description of Emmett with no balls and no brain matches my image of him exactlly, lol! Alice is really the only Cullen child I can tolerate, but she is defiantly an annoying little ball of energy.

Your description of Bella just looking at Edward with utmost hatred perectly complements how it happened in reverse with the book.

Hey, Edward's tastes in books is a bit like my own, a dose of the classics followed by a bigger portion of Kouta Hirano and Hikeyuki Kikuchi! Love that! :D And of course I need to tell you how I half freaked out when Ed looks upon the poster of Vampire Hunter D.

This line was pure gold! :D "One: Bella Cullen was not human. Two: He was irrevocably and hopelessly in love with her. Three: He was so proud that he didn’t pee his pants in front of Bella." I always appericate the Master's knack for telling it how it is! And I love the mention of the idoitic talk about anaphase and prophase!

Damn, once agian excellent call on Edward looking at D and thinking "Oh HEY! She's as hot as this guy, she's a VAMPIRE thingy...!" LOVE it! :D Of course I have two D posters hanging up in my room so... It it was wonderful that Edward, chock full of manga knowlege goes and calls her a dhampir! When you think about the Meyer vampiers do seem a hell of alot more like dhampirs than actual vampires.

I defiantly love Bella's diminstration of power in the meadow...she way outdid herself than Edward did. I can't recally excactlly what he did to show his strength but I am pretty sure he didn't hurl a 300 pound rock into nothing ness. I laughed my ass off when he was thinking "Hmm, does my blood sing Elivs or Backstreet boys?" LOL!

Another prime example of your wonderful humor was during the sweet and romantic exchange between Bella and Edward he thinking "Wow, I hope she dosn't notice this huge boner!" And the rainbow zebras, so cute and romantic and random at the same time. I love it!

I think I enjoyed this one shot far bettern that I did the orignal Twilight.:D I love how you made Bella very moody and distant, but not an unloveable ass like Edward is. And've done wonders for that boy! Here he is so human, and down to Earth, and utterly likeable. It is to bad you can't cash in for this, women definatly need to look up to this version of Edward Cullen!
MyHeartIsObsidian chapter 1 . 7/19/2009
I must say, you never fail to amuse me!

Excellent piece of art as usual :P


Lion in the Land chapter 1 . 7/18/2009
This is from the birthday girl. thank you so much! way better then twilight and funny too! i did laugh out loud while reading it and thanx for the rainbow zebra xD it has prepared me well for the teen years. again thank you!

Little lila?

Aaw - you made her very happy. Thank you, Booty! You are above and beyond. And now for MY review:

I don't know how you did it, but you managed to make this story both sweet and sarcastic. Not only did I enjoy the vampire/human reversal, I also loved getting the guy's perspective on the girl. Smitten Edward was just so cute. Frightened Edward wasn't too shabby, either. That whole thing with the plastic knife cracked me up. You have such a great way to sneak in subtle, silly humor.

And then there's the smitten/frightened combo:

'He made a note to himself: stay away from Bella Cullen. Scratch that.

New note to self: Find out if Bella Cullen is a cannibal, start dating her either way.'

Hee hee.

I'm glad I didn't icksnay the testicles from the story, because that 'testicle fondue' made it totally worth it. (I pre-warned her that that word would be in here, and all she said was, "Ew.")

That dhampir bit was great! Just too funny how he's like, "Aha!' and she's like "What?" and then poor 'Edward’s anger and confidence left him.' That was a really nice element with him seeking enlightenment from his manga.

But this, this is my favorite of all:

“I don’t speak . . . whatever language that’s in. Is it French?”

“No, it’s Italian.”

He nodded; things were starting to make sense now.

You make me laugh :D

The meadow scene - where any other author would've gone all mushy goo goo, you show the duo declare their love amidst Bella ripping out tree trunks and crunching Edward's bones. I'm so pleased that you kept vampire Bella goofy and clumsy - that was always one of the most endearing things about her.

And you came through on the rainbow zebra! What an adorable idea for a first date. Of course Edward would worry about the moral implications, but ah, what the heck - it's for his girl, he'll do it!

Thanks again - this was fun. :)

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