|Reviews for Star Trek with A Stargate|
| wesleyehowell chapter 1 . 3/27
Interesting. My biggest complaint is people acting out of character. Kirk wouldn't allow this woman to order him around whether she outranked him or not. Also, I doubt that McCoy would be at all impressed with her kill record. Also, what's your problem with McKay? Your protagonist seems more a dominatrix with her constant slapping of him. What surprises me, however is he puts up with it. Rodney may get a bit whiny, but he has also proven himself to be a hero. If this woman is a good leader, she doesn't need to prove herself by hitting people all the time. You had an interesting idea, and technically, your writing is quite good. My criticism is to know your characters more.
| highlander348 chapter 1 . 5/11/2014
| Hawkcam1996 chapter 1 . 6/16/2013
Good story, but I think I need to point out a few things. Yes, in the Army, the Marine Corps, and the Air Force, Lieutenant Colonel is higher than Captain. But in the Navy, which is what Starfleet goes by, there is no Lieutenant Colonel. In the Navy, Captain is the same rank as Lt. Colonel is in the others, so she can't pull rank on Kirk. Also, how would the Wraith evolve into the Klingons? They have no similarities at all, plus, their homeworld is in the Milky Way, whereas the Wraith homeworld is somewhere in Pegasus. Also, this series of Star Trek takes place in the 23rd century, not the 26th(But in Star Trek: Enterprise, Crewman Daniels was from the 26th century). That's all I have to say, so sorry if it seems like a flame, it's not intended to be. It is intended to be constructive criticism to help your story.
| Generic - wryteR chapter 1 . 5/25/2013
and your like what up . . .i got a piece of shiit story . . . . seriously . .. you're a woman right... otherwise i can't comprehend the stupidity that this is .. . . and the gratuitous drama, let's not forget that.
now you may say if don't like, than don't read.
i say , GOD DAMNn YOU , how was i to know this is a piece of shit, warn a guy in advance, than he won't read your shiit D:
| caligo-lux chapter 1 . 9/8/2012
warn the reader that he is about to read a self-insert story...its in most cases just as bad as the mary sue ones.
but what am i saying, she is a mary sue version 2.0
sooo what did i not like,
well enterprise with im and spock took place in 23 century.
she behaves kinda psychotic, i mean did she had PMS or what was her problem.
she shoots into the ring without seeing if she might hit her own teammates.
and the part where she threatens a captain, maybe she should have thought first about superior technology ( i mean kirk could have just let them all beamed up without real problems andleft them back on the planet to rott. (if i had been kirk i would have done just that .)
not to mention that her behavior in that part was totally bitchy, dumb and without a real reason.
its kinda a lot what i did not like, just warn the readers about the mary sue factor.
| tonygestaple chapter 1 . 6/14/2012
"What in the world?" Scotty mumbled worriedly as more shots came flying through the water. Before anyone could add on to that statement a female wearing interesting clothes came running through the water with a pretty big gun. She was raising her weapon and firing it into the water."
So this female is quite happy to shoot through the event horizon not having a clue as to whether or not she hits her colleagues instead of the enemy. Hopeless! I didn't want to read anything after that!
| Chris7221 chapter 1 . 5/3/2010
You know, this is the second ill-conceived but well-written story I've read today. Not only is it a shameless self-inclusion, but it's also incredibly stupid and full of factual errors!
| Team503 chapter 1 . 12/25/2009
A couple of things you should know:
1. A Marine Colonel is of equal rank to a Naval Captain.
2. If the Stargate program became Starfleet, where are the Gates?
3. Kill numbers are not actually recorded for ground troops, especially in counter-insurgent operations.
4. While I've no problem with cursing, remember to keep it in character. Some characters are likely to curse, but others aren't. For example, McCoy might, but Ronin wouldn't.
| exillion chapter 1 . 10/1/2009
wait wut? Not only is this a self insert but i don't get it at all...
| Yayyou chapter 1 . 9/21/2009
I would of liked you to show how McCoy aked Katie it would of been interesting
| Merethe chapter 1 . 8/15/2009
Kirk and Spock lived in the 23rd century. But It is a awesome story :D
| MacGyver07 chapter 1 . 8/5/2009
Good one! wright a nother one! Please!
| Sayle chapter 1 . 7/24/2009
Interesting idea, but makes no sense whatsoever. At all. None. Nada. Zilch. Also, using the elipsis less would be a good idea. It really...breaks...up...the story...you know?
| LCO100 chapter 1 . 7/19/2009
Interesting, I saw the Wraith more as Cardassians than Klingons. The story was very cool with an awesome plot. I like the McCoy and Kirk's sister idea.