|Reviews for A Champion's New Hope|
| Guest chapter 18 . 4/29
| HelloDarkness07 chapter 5 . 4/26
holy shit this book predicted Crimes of Grindelwald 11 years ago! fyi, I'm talking about the part in ch5, where Daphne says, "Dumbles sat back as Grindelwald killed wizards"
| Storm.nnick chapter 4 . 4/24
| dmafia ruler chapter 4 . 4/21
| Guest chapter 24 . 4/13
This has jumped the shark with this ridiculous Hermione story line. I can’t even read any more. Just stupid.
| cerulean369 chapter 52 . 4/14
I’ve spent the whole night reading this fic and I loved it! Seeing a different take on events and how things could be impacted by that one meeting in first year between Harry and Daphne was very interesting. I also commend you on a well written OP Harry, unlike other fics It wasn’t implausible nor was it overbearing, it fit into the plot without disturbing the stories flow. Thank you so much for sharing this! Hope you’re doing well. :)
| HoneyBear84 chapter 52 . 4/10
| HoneyBear84 chapter 32 . 4/9
Bellatrix is married to Rodolphus not Rabastan, Rabastan was her brother in law!
| ANewRanger chapter 52 . 4/9
Idk about everybody else, but i loved this book. Great read, I recommend
| Tenjo chapter 24 . 4/5
I’m dropping this here. Hermione is even more unlikeable here than in canon and yet she’s an integral character... I don’t really want to have to continue reading about her constant, ego-fuelled stupidity. Sure, this happened because she felt like she was useless so it doesn’t really seem like her ego is the problem, but then you realise that she was so desperate that SHE had to be at least involved that she performed a potentially dangerous, mystery ritual and walked through a shady portal with a stranger who can read her mind. Her ego refused to let her be useless and it led to this stupidity. It’s grating.
| Tenjo chapter 11 . 4/4
Okay, to rectify my last comment, you did at least have an explanation for Flitwick avoiding spells. That’s a good thing but even then I don’t particularly like the explanation. Making up non-canon magical powers for side characters, powers that serve no real purpose, it can be a little much. Why bother? If anything this bothers me more because you put effort into something completely redundant while not even bothering to choreograph the fight well. Your priorities seem a little strange to me as a reader.
| Tenjo chapter 10 . 4/4
That fight pisses me off. Harry making that mistake is understandable but the fact remains that he was keeping up with Crouch Junior until then, so why the heck was Flitwick unable to destroy him? For a ‘duelling master’, he seems to have about as much combat IQ as Ron. All he did was spam spells and, in an actual magical battle where just one landed spell should be enough for victory, he was firing little more than prank charms. Crouch Junior would have lost had Flitwick had even a lick of common sense.
Then you have the ridiculous notion that someone can dodge and dance around a barrage of spells, each of which has to be travelling upwards of 90kmph in a very cluttered space with almost no distance between the fighters. Have you ever played dodgeball? Even pros have almost no idea how to dodge, because they usually have to move preemptively. Stories always put such a heavy emphasis on dodging when it’s just not practical. Slight movements or head tilts to let things pass you by? Sure. Moving your entire body to completely dodge a spell? You’d have to guess and move before the spell is shot.
Lastly, Moody’s escape. According to you he was placed under such a constant stream of spells that he could do nothing but block... but when he wanted to escape, he just stopped blocking and turned to run? How didn’t he get absolutely hammered by that supposedly constant stream of spells? Hell, he even had enough time to cast spells of his own while running away.
To put it simply, your fight choreography is shit. You paid no attention to actually making sense of what is going on, solely focusing on making Harry and Flitwick look cool while also making sure Crouch Junior could get away. It was forced and it was lazy.
I’ll keep reading because I like the story otherwise and I hope the coming fights are better, as you probably won’t have to force things in them. Could be wrong and I could regret my decision to read on, but we’ll see.
| Venus914 chapter 28 . 4/4
You just answered your question. Why put in Ron? I think he is useless. I dont want them to be friends again. Harry is stupid for still wanting that. .
| NWFairyGodmother chapter 11 . 4/3
I have been avidly reading this story and in response to your author's notes, i would like to say there have only been two things that jumped out at me as being "off':
To start, the first thing that i noticed was the use of the word instinctually vs. instinctively a few chapters back. The adjectives instinctive and instinctual are very similar and used similarly in many contexts. As such, their definitions also have a lot in common.
(Quoted from Webster's dictionary)
Instinctive is defined as “of, relating to, or being instinct” and “prompted by natural instinct or propensity : arising spontaneously.”
Instinctual is shown as an “of, relating to, or based on instincts,” with the examples “instinctual behavior” and “the instinctual society of social insects.”
For the most part the two can be used interchangeably and be accepted, although the use of instinctive is the more accurate of the two in relation to the context of what you had written. This is only my opinion and i am by no means an expert in grammer, sentence composition, writing or just about anything else lol
The other thing that i noticed is that although Harry knew about Norberta, it appears that his friendship with Hagrid has been mostly excluded from the story. I see how that fits with your story and the story is going quite well without the friendship included. The reason it caught my attention is that Harry did know about Hagrid's dragon as a result of their close friendship, without which he probably would not have been privy to the information - especially not to the extent of knowing of Charlie Weasley's involvement. Not a big thing, certainly not a thing to be concerned about, just something i noticed that didn't fit due to logical progression. But, this is fanfiction! and as the author of this wonderful story, you are allowed to write it however you please! Logic, grammar and anything else are all things that you can use as you choose to... And if people dislike it, well too bad for them and no one said they have to read it! But, if they don't, they are going to be missing out on a great story!
| Fenrir070 chapter 13 . 3/16
Ref Author's Note - Dude...did Ron just crap treasure?