|Reviews for When They Shriek|
| Devi chapter 12 . 6/4/2011
Since it's almost ayear since you last updated you probably won't continue but still: PLEASE CONTINUE.
| Rukaru Hika Bondkeeper chapter 12 . 11/9/2010
PLEASE UPDATE SOON!
| lilfriend400 chapter 12 . 4/1/2010
Nice improvement on the details, and loads of curiosity sparks~ Not to mention the way you're keeping the characters in character (aside from the the fact that the other chapters seem more OOC than this one), but regardless, I will look forward to the return of Satoshi ;3 Haha, wonder what tortures would occur
Anyways, let's get to the critics. Small errors (ex: you could a large crumpling - Should add a 'hear' in between could and a), but you can easily fix them once you reread it a few times or more xP And am I overlooking or is it converting from a crossover to a higurashi? (unless if you're planning to add in Umineko characters in the higurashi world) Otherwise, nothing else is really wrong besides the length of the chapter -though I understand if you were focusing more on quality more than quantity.
Moving onto the suggestions, you can also attempt to make similes/metaphors, contrasts, and extensions of sentences with a detailed form of an aftermath of an activity or just a deeper description (ex: Fall had come to Hinamizawa, transforming the previous color -green- of the trees and leaves into a bright reddish orange, nearly camouflaging itself with the sunset that stretched across the sky proudly [apparently, I've also made steps to improve my writing xP]). Spacing is also a good technique, especially between different descriptions and quotes (and, from my p0v, whenever I see quotes bunch up in one paragraph, I feel like it's just rushed and not as efficiently outputted as they're suppose to be). Lastly, resources are always there to help you out, so use them when you feel like you need to. Go to and you can get some gd o synonym words, antonyms, or just definitions for understanding, and you can use them as a good addition to your fanfic (heck, that's what I use almost all the time xP)
But other than that, keep up the good work and God bless our writing skills~
| HauuHauuHanyuu chapter 8 . 10/3/2009
This story is great! Can't wait for the next chapter.
So, I guess it was Rena who killed Keichii and Satoko...
Anyway, neat story!
| Talk Bubble chapter 1 . 8/27/2009
That was amazing! Everyone was in character! Especially Frederika in the end, she freaks me out (in a good way!) I'm so glad you wrote this, I have been wanting to read an Umineko/Higurashi crossover for (counts in her head) 2 days now! (I'm so lame... i just started watching Umineko yesterday, but already I'm hooked and need this xover! )
| MonkeyGirlNaNoDa chapter 3 . 8/26/2009
Well done, well done~ you made me cry ;_;
it's well written, but you might wanna make the chapters a little longer and a bit more detailed? I found that they were very quick to read. You might wanna space out the paragraphs a bit more too? Hahaha, you don't have to take on board my suggestions, but it might improve the story a bit more. :3
| hanyuu chapter 3 . 8/18/2009
hau~ hau~ so good and they are all in charater. just one qustion is the ushirmiya family there too? because if so just think what would happen if battler and shion would meet(thinks back to battler and jessica meet on ep1) i think satoshi would be mad
| lilfriend400 chapter 1 . 7/31/2009
This was actually good, or at least better than mines. It also felt a bit rushed at the end, but I do that all (or most) of the time xD I'm looking forward to your next chapter ;] Fight on!
| Mr. Thumbsup chapter 1 . 7/30/2009
Well, friend, looks like this is going off pretty well. Liked the epilogue with Bernkastel. And it's great to see Satoshi up and about. You're not a half bad writer. Keep it up!