Hey! Just wanted to say I love your writing, great characters, emotional depth, and strong storytelling.
Your scenes have so much visual potential, and I'd, love to bring them to life as a comic or manga!

If you're ever interested, feel free to reach out on Discord: isabellajams33

this story has a second chapter?

Actually I found very interesting :3

Damn. I have no idea what just happened, but fuck if it isn't interesting! I'm disappointed this doesn't seem to have been updated in a reeeeally long time, but if you'd like a more critical analysis of this story reply and I'll gladly re-read it.

wow. This is pretty awesome. Its got enough crazy init to be crack but enough sanity and reason to make you wonder if it's really happening.

Perfect.

And I really do wanna see how the double hell and pogo sticks this happened.

You're not going to finish this, are you? That saddens me. I would adore you if you continued this. Please? Begging gets us no where. I enjoyed this, though, and I'll be the first to read if you continue it.

Whilst checking to see if ISH was updated yet or not, I decided to then check out this other fic of yours. I've gotta say, I really like the concept of the story. Those accursed fold-up maps... They made me want to punch a baby or something. Some interesting theories were thrown out within it, too. The brainwashing, obviously, but whether or not the people are actually aware where they are. That is pretty trippy. Also, where do those missing people end up? At first I thought this was a one-shot, so I tried interpreting the ending of this chapter. The three-headed dog led me to come to the conclusion that may this amusement park is a bit like the mythological three-headed dog Cerebus, the guard of the gates of the Underworld. Maybe that's where all these people are going and why it's so mysterious. Anyway, that's just my theory. However, I really would like to see where this is going (especially when Nny comes into the picture). Awesome, as always. :)

Yay! I plan on being that freak who leaves the ridiculously long review for every chapter, thus irritating the writer who knows they should appreciate it but don't anyway. Go me!

I always like these stories when Pepito and Todd grow up, but I'm warning you to be careful in advance - it's way too easy to punt them out of character and across the room. Into, uh...the corner. Yep. I dunno. I made a paragraph from the fact that I expected Todd to say 'Squee' when Old Hank grabbed him by the wrist.

Speaking of Old Hank, I'm getting this odd feeling that he's the owner, what with the bear suit and everything. Or, at least, partially involved in such a thing. He's fun, though, and kind of reminds me of Todd's grandad, but nicer. And less cannibalistic.

And, of course, we've got the creepy undertones of 'kidnapped/murdered/tortured/etc. child'. And the whole 'staying-at-the-park'. Speaking of which, I love the scene with Pepito and Todd being incredibly tired. I have to find some way to say 'I been awake for two day' at some point in time. Possibly the next time my cousins visit, because then it will most likely be the truth.

And yay, stupid people.

Nice park map, by the way. That is EXACTLY how I feel about all maps ever(particularly in malls). I've never actually been to an amusement park, but I've gone to a state fair, and those maps they give you suck.

PEPITO HAS A GOOD IDEA. And it works as a cliffhanger, too.

So anyway, I'll be doing this(writing reviews of this length, possibly longer) on a regular basis, so you're pretty much screwed. After a little bit, you'll learn to ignore me. It'll be great.

~Choko

Whe are there any plans to finish this story i rather did enjoy it! Well I'll just alert it and see what happens!

Awesomeness!

This was awesome! I hope you'll update soon!

Wow, I really can't wait for more.

This is a great start, and I hope you update soon :)

Wonderful! I can't wait for the next chapter _

Yay! Another story from the master of all stories!

This is made of PURE AWESOME, you know that?

Waiting for more. Very happily.