|Reviews for Cauterize|
| Ganheim chapter 1 . 9/17
I'm always interested in an alternate take - not as often in a villain protagonist, but as short as this was it takes full advantage of the space and sense of the fanfic idea. The only problem I have is your use of semicolons when commas or periods would've suited better. Still a good story.
| Arxanum chapter 1 . 7/11
(Hecka late comment I know)
Dude. Just dude.
This legit would be how it would turn out if you were an evil, sly, conniving protagonist who had the option to do this in the game. Gives me chills.
Very good job though
| Guile chapter 1 . 1/31/2016
| eneresy chapter 1 . 1/22/2016
this is tokyo ghoul tragedy level here
it's so wonderfully dark that I just want to see the sunshine.
I know I'm going to think about this for awhile. hahah
Thanks for writing this!
| tarratolla chapter 1 . 11/11/2015
Damn, that was good. Dig the present tense and the general feeling.
| P chapter 1 . 8/25/2015
This was just amazing.
The way everything was described was great and Soujis evilness made me feel so uneasy and kinda kinda sick.
It was so just... great I loved it.
| Raj8 chapter 1 . 1/27/2015
This was rather dark but I definitely enjoyed reading it everything was masterfully written although it amused me to note that even evil Shouji couldn't help but get care for his cousin's happiness and well being.
| game-on-panda chapter 1 . 5/20/2014
Fascinating character examining. The protagonist as evil, pure, malicious wickedness, is handled marvelously here. Your writing in this piece is very terse, to the point, blunt; it's so matter of fact in delivery, so conversational at points, that it feels almost terrifyingly rational. Great character work in this with the support cast. Excellent writing.
| FavoriteKarma chapter 1 . 2/17/2014
Wow... This... This is one of those things that really makes you love this website. You really have the potential to write actual novels. This was something that I felt happy to have experienced. After I finished reading, I sat in my bad just thinking. Thank you so much.
| Tetsuwa Shuuhei chapter 1 . 10/29/2013
Definitely one of the best fic or darkfic I've read, I really love how you stretched the possibility of Souji - the perfect protagonist, who everybody loves, into a very despair-inducing and heart-breaking characters that could make people want to torture him for what he's done.
Based on this line:
'but the dream isn't important. You already knows what she needs. What matters is what follows.'
I'm assuming it's a hint that Souji already came to Inaba before, done everything and this is his 2nd cycle, or more. Truly: 'Either you die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become a villain.' Although in the end, I sense deep down Souji's still have a heart especially when he shed a tears when Nanako died (I hope I'm not mistaken about it, or maybe deep down I wished he still has.)
Why 'Cauterize' though?
| Anon chapter 1 . 10/23/2013
I feel like the narrative hints that this Souji is a talented manipulator, but not nearly as good as he thinks he is. Most of his techniques are just childishly hitting the team in the issues that their Shadows helpfully spelled out for him. He makes that weird assumption about Chie's Shadow being weak because it didn't spawn a Dungeon, which isn't really backed up by the facts; from Yosuke, Chie, and Teddie, it seems like Shadows aren't capable of overriding preexisting territory, regardless of their character. And what he said to Naoto about girls is such a giveaway, considering the girls who are already on the team. Maybe you could spin support roles as not counting, and pretend Yukiko is only there for healing, but there's no way to pretend Chie is anything other than Chie. Naoto has to know he doesn't actually think that way, and is rejecting her as some weird power trip because he knows she needs him. I doubt it made it any less crushing, but it told her what kind of person he is.
If you take this twisted "protagonist" as a given, then this fic felt chillingly plausible. I think the parts with Yosuke, Kanji, and Naoto were the most painful. I think Yosuke can be pretty awful during some parts of the game and I was glad to see he seemed to have grown up a bit by the end, so it's really painful and plausible to imagine him debasing himself from "occasionally a dick" to "genuinely malicious" seeking Souji's approval. And oh, Kanji, he was managing it all on his own... he almost got to be happy... that's so awful. And then, there's Naoto. I like her monologues; they're really centering during the emotionally fraught parts of the game, and it's cute how she always starts out being Captain Obvious just to make sure all the facts are laid out before she starts the actual deductions. Browbeating Naoto into silence is an abomination. You know, even with her ultimate fate, I'm still a little satisfied she solved the mystery. Great detective? Greatest detective. Rise's bit is also way up there on the pain-o-meter (bonus points for casually stepping on Ai without even registering it, because she means so little). Teddie, Yukiko, Chie, and Naoki's situations were thankfully vague, so they weren't as bad. I haven't played the Nurse or Naoki's S. Links enough to get to know them yet, so that also helped, but just thinking about Naoki's parents... oh my god...
I'm cringing imagining the cutscenes and events now. There's no way Rise and Chie had the heart to get back at the boys during the pageant incident, so that stupid thing was nothing but Souji and Yosuke objectifying the girls. What a horror show. Does Yukiko still go on her dopey laughing fits, or is she too busy trying to live up to what Souji says about her? Does Rise still troll everyone when she gets bored? Does Yosuke still start treating Teddie like his little brother? Did the King's Game happen, or the group "study sessions"?
I've read this a couple times and I can't even figure out why Souji treated everyone like shit. Murder, sure, he had to foment the fog. But wow, why such a douchebag? I guess he was just so broken by whatever it was that Izanami did to him.
I really like this fic. It makes me want to go play the game right now so I can slobber all over the team in their Social Links. If there's a dialogue option along the lines of "you're awesome" or "I rely on you" then it's gettin' picked every time.
| Progenitus chapter 1 . 3/19/2013
This is what I felt like in the gameplay-that Souji has to be cruel if not evil, just stringing along everybody, exploiting their weaknesses to fuse personas of all things. There's not a shred of care underneath his calm exterior, but everybody can't help but love him a little because he's the one. The most successful villain of all indeed. Although I'm really interested in seeing him /get away with it too/. God wouldn't the world be a fucked up place?
Anyway, SUPERB characterization, it's always a pleasure to read dark!protagonist!
| Dysanian chapter 1 . 12/6/2012
Wow, this is absolutely haunting and completely perfect. You captured all of the characters voices, so that this seems like a completely legitimate scenario. Well done!
| Miss Hanamura chapter 1 . 7/28/2012
Oh my god, this is...
Just beautiful. Wow... Just, wow...
| Cuna999 chapter 1 . 8/12/2011
This is pure just...ouch. Souji would indeed make the perfect villain. It's way too easy, with his social links and whatnot.
But...damn. Ouch. Rise and Kanji's especially made me cringe, and Naoto...poor Naoto. And Yosuke. And Namatame. And Yukiko and Chie, because it's just so easy for Souji. Even Adachi. And Naoki and Sayoko...I'm not sure what to think about Saki and Mitsuo, but they didn't deserve to die like that...just...POOR EVERYONE. At least Teddie's okay, but...it's a little sad, that Teddie looks up to Souji so much and in the end he's the murderer. Looks like Souji only cared about Nanako...and even that is questionable.
...Man. Just...ouch. xD
Very well written though, definitely effective and powerful. This definitely sticks in my mind.
Really amazing piece, but it also leaves me sitting here feeling like someone splattered blood all over the social link and poured salt onto flesh wounds...xD