|Reviews for Mouse, Warrior, Protector and Friend|
| Redwallfreak108 chapter 1 . 6/23/2010
actually you are very wrong, i think this is actually pretty good! im not an expert but i've read enough poetry to know the difference between the crap ones and good ones (yours being the latter of course) anyways just keep on practicing and then you'll c that it will be much better in time! .
| SkilletFan000 chapter 1 . 3/30/2010
Actually... That was really good. I can relate to you thinking it would suck though (which, by the way it does not.) I thought my first story on was gonna be FLAMED like crazy. I have had no bad reviews. So y'see, its a matter of perspective...
I love Redwall! I've read all of them except the new one, which I'm told is out now.
So, yeah I really liked that. By the way, you don't want my advice on poetry. Seriously.
P.S. Thanks for your review on 'The Way The Game Is Played'
| Meyli chapter 1 . 11/12/2009
The worst part was probably the A/N at the end.
You wrote it very well, and you didn't launch into this lovelorn "oh I miss Rose" thingy.
| glynne chapter 1 . 8/20/2009
Actually, I liked it. I can't decide how I feel about the rhyme scheme; sometimes it's ABAB, sometimes it's not. I'm not suggesting you should slavishly stick to the ABAB, it can start to sound like doggerel (you know, sing-song). To me, I think the most important part of poetry tends to be the meter; the number of syllables in the line, and which syllables are stressed and unstressed. If the rhythm of the poem flows well, I tend to like it; if it gets ragged I find it distracting. Overall, I think your rhythym worked well in most places, especially for someone who doesn't write poetry often.
| Much Ado About Nonny chapter 1 . 8/14/2009
Sucked? I think not. It was actually rather good. You found a rhyme scheme and stuck to it, and the rhythm was melodious and constant.
Only one rough spot that I could see...I thought you meant for "hope" to rhyme with "cope," but I was wrong, so no matter.
I'm no expert judge at poetry, but I liked it. Well done. I do hope you'll write more.
| Moonrise31 chapter 1 . 8/14/2009
What are you talking about? It was great :) The rhythm is a bit off at places. You could read it out loud to yourself and shorten or elongate some phrases to make it run smoother. But it's still a really good poem :D I read the Redwall series too, but I've never read any fanfics of it.
[ : ) ] Haha, Al can start to take over the Redwall fandom now! ;)