|Reviews for Collateral Damage|
| Rosalind2013 chapter 30 . 2/11/2014
So I finally finished reading this story, and what a whirlwind it has been. I started from the very beginning two days ago, and I simply could not stop. It was almost like I was reading it for the very first time all over again. I must say, I really admire your ability to pull the reader's heartstrings; the ending especially threw me for a loop.
At first it seemed like everything was going just fine, and then BAM, BB figured out that he was dying.
With all of the twists and turns in the plot and flawless dialogue, this is really my favorite story to read. I laughed, I cried, I threw things, and I cried some more. Collateral Damage really brought the real world to the perfect little cartoon world we like to pretend we live in, creating a vibrant hybrid of a story that catches the reader in a vise-like grip.
You explored a lot of ideas that most of us were too afraid to even consider. You offered possible answers to questions like, "What would it take for a hero to have an 'honorable' death?" I know from my experience, that it often takes an altruistic act of sacrifice to be considered a hero after death, such as when my grandfather gave his life to save a boy from drowning. I don't believe that people would have remembered him in the same light had he died in his sleep, or while working. It was through the ultimate sacrifice that he gained the respect of the collective group.
It seems that you applied the same concept to Beast Boy. While it definitely upset me that he died, mortality is a part of life, and I am quite satisfied with the way he was honored after death. I like the idea that the public would have a memorial statue built, it was really a beautiful and consoling touch.
You continue to be an inspiration to me, even years after you finished writing this story. I am just sorry that it took me so long to read it all the way through. I am glad that I did, though!
Thank you for being so helpful and kind to me!
| BethyQuake chapter 30 . 11/27/2013
I loved it, I actually cried a little at the end
and OMG you vocabulary is the best,
I had to look up most of the words
| Guest chapter 3 . 11/2/2013
And this is where I lose interest with the story.
You have a strong premise. What if Robin made left Beast Boy behind in order to save lives?
You could have explored how BB would react. Would he agree with the decision, dying a hero's death in order to save civilians? Or would he be resentful and bitter? How would Raven and Starfire react? How would CYBORG react?
Going off of Cyborg's reaction, the story would be a lot better if the timeline was the Titan's early days. Back when Cy and Robin "fought" for leadership, and Robin hadn't warmed up to his teammates as more than that, but friends and eventually family.
Then you would be able to play around with Robin being hated, Cyborg going rogue, Raven and Starfire acting differently, and BB being VERY resentful.
Instead, you introduce the idea of Beast Boy's inner Beast. As cool as that seems, it's an overused plot device, usually to have Raven go into BB's mind for romantic purposes, but it's still overused.
I don't even understand how that works. Beast Boy's mind is still human. Unless a human has severe mental issues, they don't have multiple personalities, and nothing in the show suggests that BB would have a mental issue. Sure he suffered a lot but he doesn't show it other than hiding the pain with jokes and showing sorrow, neither and indication of mental illness.
There was the Beast episode with Adonis, but that was only triggered by chemicals. And past then we never see the Beast gain any kind of foothold in Beast Boy's mind. I like to believe it's an instinct, like how sometimes humans instinctively shield each other in car crashes. It's not trying to be dominant; it just comes out to serve its purpose, to help in a sticky situation.
Frankly, between Robin's OOC and the whole overused "Beast" trying to control Beast Boy's mind, I have to give up on the story. I really want to like it; you have excellent grammar and spelling, you capture the Titans well (other than Robin's one major decision), and it feels like a Teen Titans story. I just can't get over those two major issues.
| Guest chapter 2 . 11/2/2013
Promising story so far. Beast Boy and Cyborg's trip to the mall is very realistic, it's a rare treat to they want to savor it.
We haven't seen a lot of Raven and Starfire, but they seem pretty in character so far.
The major major mistake here is Robin. I understand his obsession with Slade, the show documents that several times. I understand he is likely to be a very "at all costs" guy, he worked with Batman. I just simply CANNOT see him abandoning a critically wounded teammate just to follow Cinderblock.
I can see him sending Cyborg to chase / damage control Cinderblock over himself, as he lacks super strength and once he runs out of discs, he's done. I can see him being very worried about the civilians' safety. I can see him being very concerned that he might lose a good chance to finally catch Slade.
I just don't think that any or all of those reasons are worth leaving Beast Boy to die. And it doesn't even make that much sense rationally.
1. How much effort would it be to call 911 and get a helicopter to get BB to a hospital?
2. If Cinderblock was leaving / running home to Slade, Robin would have to worry less about civilians' safety.
3. It's not like Slade is just going to disappear after this. If he still hangs around Jump City, it's a good chance Cinderblock isn't the last chance EVER to find Slade.
4. So far Slade has outsmarted the Teen Titans. And he's not stupid. He probably knows Cinderblock will lead the Titans right to him, a perfect set up of a trap.
5. Robin knows how dangerous Slade is. Does he really want to confront him at 4/5 of the team's strength?
6. Robin really cares about all his teammates. He wants them all to be well, making BB apologize to Raven when he messes up because he doesn't want his team to by dysfunctional. He could also want Raven and BB to have a less confrontational relationship. Leaving Beast Boy for dead won't accomplish those goals.
7. Really petty reason. What would Starfire think?
Seeing as how I believe that Robin's decision will be a major plot point, I am going to really have to suspend my disbelief if I want to continue reading.
Grammar and spelling was well done. Descriptive text without being overly flowery. Action scenes written well, which everyone always says "i suck at fight scenes lol roflmao YOLO". Strong pacing, I never felt like nothing was going on but neither does anything happen too fast to follow (but I've only read 2 chapters so far).
| Bandit chapter 30 . 10/5/2013
This story is one of the best fanfictions I have ever read, and I have read a LOT. Thank you for producing this amazing work.
| Violently Red chapter 30 . 8/25/2013
Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
| mysticdragon01 chapter 29 . 6/28/2013
I don't usually read just under 200,000 words in one afternoon, but you have created a story that was simply impossible to turn away from. There is absolutely nothing I can possibly critique; all I can do is spout praise and I will because I think you deserve it.
The aspect I could come closest to critiquing is Robin's milestone decision to abandon Beast Boy. I didn't think, and still don't, that he would do such a thing. He does have his Batmanesque moments, but that seemed just too cold. In the cartoon, while Robin did betray his friends to an extent, he came around before he could cause them serious harm. But I don't know about other canon portrayals of Robin, so you may be basing his character off of a source I don't know about. Regardless, as a plot device, it's great.
I was amazed by everything else. The beginning was a great build up to the moment of Beast Boy's supposed death. The details of the surgery and the realism of it all enthralled me; I love it when an author goes out of their way to do research. Little details such as that make the story so much better. Same goes for your description of the Sarin gas. Speaking of the medical procedures, you've also managed to seamlessly introduce OCs that don't bother me. On the contrary, they were great, and I don't often say that about OCs.
Anyway, now that I think back on it, I don't know how you filled up those tens of thousands of words. It was all so fluid that I can't even separate this into chapters in my memory. I will say, though, that you built up the climax perfectly, and the climax itself was great. As a devout Beast Boy fan, I was overjoyed that he actually managed to hold his own against Slade and ultimately save the city. Whether or not this is my character favoritism speaking, it's nice to see Beast Boy get some credit.
At the price of death, that is... And what a powerful last chapter and epilogue that was. The part about the media moved me, and so did the entire epilogue. As much as my emotions wanted it, I appreciate that the ending wasn't all happy and that there was a dark undertone to it.
All in all, I'm very glad I read this, and it's one of the best Teen Titans fan fics I have so far come across, if not the best. I've learned some new vocabulary words thanks to you, and your incredible writing style inspires me. Thank you very much for uploading.
| MizuRasengan chapter 30 . 4/21/2013
| Fatal Overdose chapter 29 . 3/24/2013
*snuffle* notgonnacrynotgonnacrynotgon nacrynotgonnacry...
| LightAngelHiroko chapter 30 . 3/20/2013
Wow...just wow. What a beautiful work of art you have created. You had me ensnared from chapter one hating and loving ever second of it, the emotions, the pain, the joy. You have done an amazing thing. Thank you.
| iamking chapter 30 . 3/2/2013
beautiful ending.i thoroughly enjoyed this story,you've done a wondrous job!
| iamking chapter 26 . 3/1/2013
it's good that everyone is alive(at least for now).
on a side(and practically retarded note) how was slade going to deal with number two,if he didn't have a bucket? also wouldn't the smell drive him crazy over the course of 3(ish)days?
that aside great chapter.
| iamking chapter 24 . 3/1/2013
just got real!
is basically the titans punching bag. :)
| iamking chapter 23 . 3/1/2013
you write well.
| iamking chapter 20 . 2/28/2013