|Reviews for Come, Natsuki, The Game is Afoot|
| Syein chapter 6 . 12/11/2014
You know, I never have any gold stars in your story.
| immo chapter 9 . 2/17/2013
Just amazing. This has been a very well-written story and an extremely good read. I'm going to see if you have more, now. Thank you so much!
| xx Catty xx chapter 9 . 2/13/2013
Oh Whoa I must say I enjoyed this story of the series much more than the first one C: Merci beaucoup for the extremely interesting read, writer-san! Although I still can not get used to your Shizuru. I still think that this role of the character with Holmesian talent for 'deduction' does not suit Shizuru F... But I think I found a solution. I'll just think of her as an OC. The absolutely new character Shizlock :) This will help me to calm down and stop comparing and draw parallels between canon and your Shizuru.
| Golden Mean Fallacy chapter 9 . 2/6/2013
So, onto main story #2. On a whole, I'd say that really, aside from a couple complaints, one major and one minor, this is more or less a story that I don't have much negative to say about; it's a nice little atmospheric period piece that is thoroughly enjoyable to read.
Honestly, I've gone over my feelings regarding your writing style prior, and I don't really feel the need to constantly repeat myself; overall, you do a good enough job at replicating the feel of Victorian language that any real screw-ups are easily skimmed over and dismissed. The expository style works quite well, and you blend together referential humor and original content excellently. That can be seen quite clearly here; you manage to not only blend together the effective elements of Hound and Engineer's Thumb into a cohesive whole, but inject them into an original story quite seamlessly, while managing to provide an ending that honestly possesses a far more satisfying catharsis than either.
One complaint that I didn't think to bring up vis a vis Hidden Depths was that the whole bit of Natsuki's backstory feels incredibly awkward, if one is going in fresh. It's just a couple lines with no real fanfare behind them.
I heavily suspect (though I could very well be wrong!) that this is simply because of the simple chronological conflict- even though Hidden Depths occurs first narratively this was first chronologically, and since you had already incorporated an introduction to her back story here it would just be redundant.
And this story does the excellent job that Depths could've: Natsuki's backstory is fleshed out, with a proper amount of emphasis on the kind of impact that would have on a little girl, and a proper utilization of the first-person narrative style to really drive home just the right amount of pathos. The way that Natsuki's side plot is used as a method to book-end the story is also quite effectively done.
The transition from Natsuki's tale to Shizuru's case is told in a convincing way, and the transition back to Natsuki's story at the end is equally smooth and effective. While the audience is essentially handed a non-answer, the tidbits that are given are definitely enough to interest the reader in learning exactly where this plot is going.
You can also see bits and pieces of development in Shizuru, primarily in the way that she interacts with Natsuki which while kept primarily subtextual, is quite effective.
On a whole, one of the story's main successes is really fleshing out the relationship between Shizuru and Natsuki. Perhaps it's simply because the two characters are far more comfortable with each other now or because you're more comfortable with writing them, but their banter is even more effective than it was in the first story. The two play off each others personalities amazingly well, and really echo the Holmes-Watson dynamic in all the right ways. Not to mention how smoothly you manage to maintain the evolution of their relationship; even in this case alone, the amounts Natsuki's attitude towards Shizuru morphs and changes is quite startling.
The characterization of the rest of the cast is mostly incidental, up until the end. The culprit and Warburton both get a good deal of fleshing out in the denouement, but the purpose of most of the characters is to be effective set-pieces in a mystery, and that's how they stay.
The mystery itself is quite decent. The story is compelling, and the atmospheric nature really draws the reader in. It develops at a solid pace, with enough clues given to the audience that it doesn't ever feel like you're cheating, while still making it a story that's constructed intelligently enough that even if you do catch onto the solution and thus spoiled of the surprise, you feel satisfied with the answer the story provides.
My main complaint is the whole aspect of the killer's motive. It was a great motive, and the confrontation at the end was effectively emotional and dramatic. However, it felt like it comes out of left-field, somewhat. While the story does an effective job at building up a dramatic atmosphere and does effectively portray Warburton's grief and emotional pain, it feels like the themes of revenge, despair, and love are far more effectively portrayed in Natsuki's section of the tale than in Shizuru's, and thus the sequence of reveals that concludes her section of the story feel like they just kind of come out of nowhere, instead of being a natural byproduct of what we'd read thus far.
On a whole though, that does little to dampen an excellent reading experience; an excellent sequel that really expands and improves upon the original in pretty much all the ways that really matter.
| annoyingLONER chapter 9 . 1/5/2013
you are one smart cookie
| according2Angie chapter 9 . 10/25/2012
It's so good! I didn't stop until I reached the last chapter! Thank you
| Michael S. Repton chapter 9 . 7/27/2012
Epic double finale - wasn't expecting that at all! :) I'm going to go straight on to read the next story now - I can't get enough of these!
| Michael S. Repton chapter 7 . 7/27/2012
Excellent descriptions of the vigil and the fight, and it was great to see Natsuki getting her chance to be awesome!
| Michael S. Repton chapter 4 . 7/27/2012
:D I love the interaction between the two leads and the way their relationship is developing. It's hilarious and heartwarming all at the same time, and it forms a lovely counterpoint to the mystery. Can't wait to see how this continues in the rest of the series!
| Michael S. Repton chapter 2 . 7/27/2012
This is just so good that I can't review every chapter or write more than a few lines; I just have to keep reading. What I have to say for now is that I love the atmospheric descriptions in this story - as well as the hints of suspicion and the neat references to the original Holmes canon ;)
| Wolf-of-Five-Elements chapter 9 . 2/23/2012
Great story! Now I have a desire to read the Sherlock Holmes books (I keep meaning to get to it...). Nice job.
| oOYuuOo chapter 1 . 2/22/2012
I really enjoyed reading it!
Thank you so much for this! :3
| robyn chapter 9 . 12/29/2010
clever cheek what with all the interaction between the two and just the cruel bit of potential
| deathcurse chapter 5 . 12/4/2010
About the lock-picking scene, either Sherlock Holmes was known for being a bad lock-pick or you deliberately gave that skill to Natsuki for characterization purposes, but it really reminded me of the running gag in the latest Sherlock Holmes movie where Sherlock would always get interrupted before he could actually pick any locks P.
| ZonaRose chapter 9 . 11/29/2010
This one was better then the first one. Looking foreword to the next ones.