|Reviews for Beads|
| Lithianne chapter 1 . 3/30/2010
I've read the story, I 've read you're author's note and since I was curious what kinda review you responded to I've read the reviews as well.
Which is what finally got me to write a review myself.
I rarely do it, 'cause either the story isn't worth it in my eyes or I'm too lazy.
So. Where to start.
I think what the reviewers before me missed about the review in question is, that he/she didn't mean, that you should stick to the plotline of the original when writing fanfiction. But you should stick to the characterizations.
And yes, I partly agree with the too-lazy-person: there are certain catch-phrases in the story which make me kinda irritated, phrases you read in every second fiction on this site. Why do people always think Axel is stupid or always does stupid things? (He IS the mastermind who arranged every member in Castle Oblivion to vanish, almost without dirtying his own hands, but you didn't play CoM, I suppose, so you're kinda excused ;))
Why do people seem to make him submissive to Roxas? Because he lost to Roxas at the beginning of the game?
And Roxas seems to always(not only in your story, it's something I noticed in almost every story in Axel/Roxas-fandom)be annoyed with Axel. How can he like him, if he finds him to be so f-ing annoying?
And I'm sorry for writing such a long rant in your story, I do think the story has its nice points and is overall a rather pleasant story to read. The idea with the beads was really cute. :)
But sometimes you get fed up with all the stuff that irritates you in fandoom and a single phrase can set you off... which is what I think happened here.
I myself was a bit put off by the first phrase of your story.
Which like I said is rather a...how should I put it...a process of getting too sensitive toward stuff you usually wouldn't mind, but after reading it in bad story after bad story it can ruin your feelings for an otherwise really good story.
And I'm really sorry that I'm not that focused on your story in this review, I just had to get this off my chest.
| 0o.Kizuna.o0 chapter 1 . 2/14/2010
This is ridiculously sweet! 3 Axel seems mute.
| Masterday chapter 1 . 10/15/2009
I disagree; I think the characterization was just fine. Roxas is a little bitchy, but kind of shy and quiet. Axel's casual and slightly cocky, even if he has that moment where he's really sad. It seems fine to me.
And this is so damn cute! I loved the little quirks you gave Roxas in his narration, they made it an interesting and amusing read. :)
| LollipopLove chapter 1 . 10/3/2009
This was AMAZING. The meaning of the beads was so much better than I had originally thought. I thought it was just set up to match the color of their eyes and hair. Red, green, yellow, blue etc. But this was incredibly sweet! I'm definitely going to raid your profile.
I think that reviewer was a little silly saying that about your story. Even if they didn't mean any offense by it. Because really, it's fanfiction. And if everyone just went about writing strictly according to what was seen in the games, fanfiction would be INCREDIBLY BORING. Plus, it's always refreshing to see different takes on characters!
I absolutely love this story~
| To lazy to log-in chapter 1 . 9/25/2009
what a cute idea! I's definitely unique.
On the other hand, the characterization is really bad.
Sometimes I wonder if people who wirte fanfiction actually played the games or read the manga.
what a pitty, could have been a really good oneshot.
| DeleteAccount 12345678 chapter 1 . 9/20/2009
aww it was cute D: i dont usually like fluff but AW DX SO KAWAII
| RaineArilan chapter 1 . 9/17/2009
Ah, so cute and fluffy. I adored it. The two of them are so dorky, but it a very good way. lol And I just KNEW he was going to make his own bracelets. I just knew... and then he did. Yay!
On a purely technical note, your tenses did get a bit confusing. It flickers between past and present so often that I'm really not sure which one you were going for. It almost looks like the first chunk was a flashback-type-thing, then it goes back to present time with "But now it's October..." in which case it should all be in past, or maybe past-past, tense. It's a tricky balance, doing something like that, but I totally get why you used it for this piece.
That being said, keep in mind that I still read the whole thing and liked it enough to review, so please don't get upset over the critique thing. I love the fic and I think you do this pairing very well. *hands out e-cookies*
| Dance.Grimmjow.Dance chapter 1 . 9/17/2009
This was so cute. And adorable. And just perfect xD
AkuRoku fluff is so cute:3
Jeez, could I say cute anymore in one review?
| BlooJhay chapter 1 . 9/17/2009
I really liked it.
The bead idea was different and interesting.