|Reviews for New Love|
| Screaming Dean chapter 6 . 10/5/2014
I'm happy to see you're doing so well. Keep up the good work.
| Screaming Dean chapter 4 . 10/5/2014
I loved how you brought Ryoga into this.
| Screaming Dean chapter 3 . 10/5/2014
I love how you've written Kuno. This is definitely a different side of him.
| Screaming Dean chapter 1 . 10/5/2014
This is somewhat original. I'm happy to read it.
| Adamantium Dragon of Aincrad chapter 1 . 7/19/2014
*laugh* just found this story, the AU was funny, the story great... i gotta say, it's promising! heres for your cardboardbox
*gives a giant bag of coal*
| Claire Danielle chapter 7 . 8/12/2012
Interesting story, I would have liked to see where this would go next, thanks for sharing.
| Ranmaleopard chapter 1 . 2/1/2012
this is really awesome and interesting i cant wait to see what happens next please continue!
| Strawberry Pepper chapter 5 . 11/3/2011
this is a interesting premise bogged down by poor pacing, bad characterisation, and just a lot of stuff that you are twisting out of whack.
jusenkyo doesn't work that way, and really why? why make ranma a child? you know, luke was pretty old when he started to get trained. and ranma already has a lot you can build on.
kuno not being who he is i can take, but why is ryoga suddenly so sappy? also, where is kodachi in all of this if kuno is a jedi from another planet?
and one of the biggest problems: why have it be that ranma wasn't born on earth? what, you can't be a jedi if you were born on earth? is there something special to ranma's parents (in a star wars canon sort of way)? and what about who ranma and nodoka look alike when ranma is a girl? you took this fic from after she shows up, so you can't just sweep that under the rug.
also, that little note about how you like purple and how you know about ranma's eyes being blue is in the wrong place and breaking flow. make it a part of the notes at the top or bottom, not in the middle of a scene.
there is so much you want us to take for granted and so much you change far too fast. frankly, my suspension of disbelief has been taxed and broken by this chapter and i can no longer read.
this doesn't feel like it was spawned from either series. rushed, twisted, and flavorless.
please read more books and get a feel for character development, scene setting, and pacing as well as reread ranma 1/2 and at least watch the original three star wars movies again.
also, take your time with these chapters. go back and reread them, show them to a beta reader, and figure out what you really want to get out of each chapter. out of each scene.
truth be told, i could handle kuno being a jedi, i can even handle a possible relationship between ranma and kuno (as you seemed to be hinting to at first). however, all of the flaws heavily out way what fun there is here.
not really sure how to end this, but understand this is not a flame, but an honest opinion from a fellow writer. i know i made some stupid writing mistakes myself in the past, but i've learned from it and am learning still.
while 'because i want to' is just fine as a reason to do anything in fanfiction, it makes for a better story if you can explain your choices with reasoning from the source materials and with in the plot of your story. what is the point? what is the ultimate end you are aiming for? why do certain things to characters?
the more you are able to answer the hows and whys and whats of character motivation, plot direction, and over all story presentation with more then just a 'i like it this way', the better your stories will become.
| Raynze76 chapter 7 . 9/12/2011
a Interesting story, will be interesting to find out what species she is and what the future holds for the trhee
| animefreak 171 chapter 7 . 1/21/2011
sweet chapter i cant wait to see Star Killer get his but kicked by chibi ranma-chan
| animefreak 171 chapter 6 . 1/15/2011
Cool storie so far plz update asap
| god of stuff chapter 6 . 8/28/2010
Well this is fairly interesting. It looks promising so far though I am a little fuzzy on what the timeline is as far as the starwars universe. I think the change in Ranma was a little ill thought out. She has regressed in both mentally and physically with very little prompting. It would have made sense if she had been pushed just a little further to the breaking point. possibly by herb at least partially succeeding, as distasteful as that image is.
| Legacy Seeker chapter 6 . 8/23/2010
This story might turn out very good if you treat it right.
Few questions though, exactly when in the star wars universe is this? From the history Kuno gave, I'm guessing it's somewhere right before the fourth move (A New Hope). Also, why did you chibify Ranma?
Anyways, keep up the good work.
| ranma-chan-14 chapter 5 . 7/23/2010
Seems like a nice story so far, can't wait to see what will happen next. -
| NabikiB chapter 3 . 6/28/2010
I don't suppose you're the same Anonymous that I've read the ficcies of in M&A? Because if you are, you're seriously under posting...