Reviews for Melody
90TheGeneral09 chapter 1 . 1/25
Well, it was short. I assume this narrator is an OC... since no half-sister of the "Alpha Dog" character Elvis is ever referred to. You need to do some proofreading on this, because half these sentences in dialogue don't even have a question mark or period at the end. I really have no idea where you were even planning to go with this. Just being honest, you would probably be better of writing a fanfic for Alpha Dog about... well, anybody *but* Johnny or Elvis. I wouldn't waste five minutes writing anything about them.
Tassie66 chapter 1 . 4/6/2010
a very sarcastic way of telling some one you don't love them I think she could be a little more, kind about saying it and calling him an arsenide.

Not very lady like in my book ok be move kinder next time as there are enough bullies about the world now.
HermioneandMarcus chapter 1 . 2/4/2010
great chapter update and i can not wait to read more of it as soon as you can write it please and thank you
chocolate fountain chapter 1 . 1/5/2010
im sorry i dont think its developed enough, i think this is a good start but its very short? i dont know if my laptops being stubborn and cutting off 3 quarters of the story but its so short! and it seems to go way to fast, its like oh and by the way i like her but she doesn't do drugs, oh no whatever will i do, i 'll ask her out anyway though and then END OF STORY! it just seems to be way to quick.

i do think it needs inprovments but with a little help you could really develop this into a worthwhile story.

constructive criticism hun xx
candykissesAndsugarplums chapter 11 . 11/24/2009
I Loved it was soo good

plz update it soon

i loved it i can't wait for the next chapt
HermioneandMarcus chapter 11 . 11/23/2009
Great chapter update and i can not wait to read more of it as soon as you can please and thank you
HermioneandMarcus chapter 9 . 11/20/2009
Great chapter update and i can not wait to read more of it as soon as you can please and thank you
candykissesAndsugarplums chapter 9 . 11/20/2009
AW that was soo good

i like Johnny having a soft side

you never got to see it the movie
candykissesAndsugarplums chapter 8 . 11/15/2009
aww how sweet soo cute

plz update it was so good

i can't wait for the rest
HermioneandMarcus chapter 8 . 11/7/2009
Great chapter update and i can not wait to read more of it as soon as you can please and thank you
HermioneandMarcus chapter 7 . 10/24/2009
Great chapter update and i can not wait to read more of it as soon as you can write please and thank you
HermioneandMarcus chapter 5 . 10/2/2009
Great chapter update and i can not wait to read more of it as soon as you can please
HermioneandMarcus chapter 4 . 9/30/2009
great chapter update and i can not wait to read more of it as soon as you can write please and thank you
HermioneandMarcus chapter 3 . 9/29/2009
great chapter and i can not wait to read more of it