Reviews for Ad Undas
Simply Mim chapter 9 . 2/3/2013
I adored this story! Your characters were wonderful! Laurie was amazing, but of course, especially considering she is the bad guy in the Rapunzel fic. You know, I actually really like how you redid the story making Rapunzel bad and the witch good. And that Rapunzel is actually a witch... Jack, I think, has really grown on me. It was awful of him to have said all those things- I'm glad Laurie pointed that out, instead of just throwing everything in the past away like a silly girl-but he is quite endearing. I really loved how you ended this. (I also wondered about Lorelei's name... it didn't occur to me she had stolen it, though!) It was very fitting! And there was a lot more kissing in this, it made my inner fan girl very happy, haha. Your stories are amazing! Sorry I didn't actually review anything, just rambled about what I was thinking... I think you're an amazing writer, though!
Simply Mim chapter 8 . 2/2/2013
I liked the parallel between the prince and Lairelie. I'm in love with Laura's wit; she talks even when her heart is breaking and it's awesome. But most of all, I really loved Jackie's speech. Even though the fool was under a mermaid's curse for 15 years
Simply Mim chapter 7 . 2/2/2013
Simply Mim chapter 6 . 2/2/2013
Okay wait. So the mermaid is Rapunzel? And Laurie is the witch? But that thing that she had taken from the prince was Rapunzel/the mermaid? This all is actually making a lot of sense, it's scary. But I don't remember Rapunzel dying. Haha, not that I'm sad about that. But who started singing again? Rapunzel? The actual little mermaid? Or, more likely than Ariel, the prince? Ahhh! I think you made a grammatical mistake in this paragraph:
He wanted to hurt as he hurt, wound as he was wounded – it was a vicious refrain pounding in his blood – he wanted to destroy her.
Did you mean he wanted her to hurt as he hurt?
And while we're on the subject of Jackie; he's been bewitched for fifteen years? Dang that's a long time. He was a jerk to Laurie, for sure, but now I don't know if it was truly his words or the mermaid's.
So, when Laurie started having an inner debate on being noble, I got confused. But then she killed the mermaid, and things made sense again. Loll. How did she rationalize that it was noble to let your love go to his death, though? That didn't make much sense
Simply Mim chapter 5 . 2/2/2013
Ah! Laura does love him still! But she originally wanted to marry the Selkie prince? Now, I want to know just how she encountered the prince. Did he save her from her tower or did that bit not happen at all? But back to Laura and Jackie...THEY AREN'T GOING TO BE TOGETHER I JUST KNOW IT. SO SAD! I liked that part where after he asked her if she still loved him and we heard someone's thoughts but couldn't be sure it was Laura's. after all, who's to say Jackie didn't love her back in his own way? You haven't happened to have read To Catch a Pirate have you? There is a bit of a similarity in it and this chapter. Why is the siren back? How did she find him when he was with Laura again? But are Laura and the siren friends? I am very curious about their relationship
Simply Mim chapter 4 . 2/2/2013
Firstly, I KNEEEEEW IT! Oh man, am I loving grown up...Laurel? Is that really her name? So, Jack really did go 15 years thinking his guy friend Laurie was in love with him, and he was okay with that? That's really something, especially if I am to assume this is set circa 18th century. And I'm sure Jack (WAIT, he's named JACK and he's not a pirate? A shame, I must say) has grown up handsomely as all Jack's tend to be. Oh! I didn't mention this, but I thought the Jack-common-as-beans was a hilarious reference to Jack and the beanstalk. Anyways, I'm digging this Kingston guy for some odd reason. And was Jackie JEALOUS of the closeness between Laurie and Kingston, or am I just being an overanalytical fan girl? Incidentally, this dynamic of good sailor and bad pirate who fall in love is probably my favorite of all time! I'll hopefully get around to writing one of my own. I can't wait for Laurie to antagonize Jackie some more!
Simply Mim chapter 3 . 2/2/2013
Okay wait. Now I'm super confused. So Laurie is Rapunzel in this story, that I'm fairly certain I've got right. But is Laurie really a boy? Not that that bothers me, but I am confused a little by the historical context. Because if I was Jackie, I'd be super confused by Laurie kissing him. Is being gay socially acceptable? Jackie saying that he won't tell anyone makes me think it's not, which means Jack is really a fantastic friend. But when Laurie slapped him and then got mortified, it made me think that slapping is a girly reaction and Laurie was angry that he accidentally behaved like a girl. Gah, I'm so confused! I'm sure the next chapter will explain, but I thought I would share with you how I feel right now.
Simply Mim chapter 2 . 2/2/2013
Why didn't Laurie get enchanted? THIS JUST CONFIRMS MY THEORY! Ha! Also, I'm fairly certain Laurie admitted to loving Jackie; this could of course be brotherly love, but I like my theory :) Laurie managed to capture a mermaid, did he? How interesting. I wonder how that was managed. Also, I think Jack is hilarious. He spouts off weird poetry when he thinks about the mermaid AND makes lists of all the things he feel about her? This kid is too much. Your skill with language is beautiful, by the way.
Simply Mim chapter 1 . 2/2/2013
I'm reading this now, as per your suggestion! I can't believe I haven't read this till now, actually, since I love Rapunzel and pirates. Okay, I shall actually review now! Firstly, Laurie sounds like a cutie pie. But he also sounds like a girl, who ran away and decided to dress up as a boy. I'm very suspicious. Incidentally, how intelligent are selkie Princes? Because if the poor fool actually mistook a young boy for a girl, that's really very sad. I do like how Laurie is a realist, even at the age of 10, and is motivated to do something to keep himself important. It's very commendable. Jack is interesting as well. I noticed that while he was listening to the siren's song, he thought of Laurie, and immediately after the song stopped. Coincidence? I am withholding any real judgement on Jackie, though.
MeldaTavar chapter 9 . 9/12/2012
Brilliant! Great tale with just the right atmosphere.
chibilulu chapter 9 . 4/14/2012
Having read almost all of your stories now, I have to say this is my favourite so far. I was so surprised Laurie and Jack got a happy fairytale ending. It's not your usual style (which I also adore by the way). I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic at heart...

It's brilliant that I actually understood this one on the first read through because usually I have to read through it at least twice to understand everything that's going on... Sorry for my stupidity... Your literary genius is just too great, us mere mortals have trouble keeping up.

Laurie and Jack are great characters and their interactions are so believable and not cliched. She is so spirited and tenacious and not at all goody-two-shoes like your typical princess. I love her! Then again, I suppose she's not really a princess. And Jack is the perfect "Prince Charming" albeit with much more personality. I like that he is noble and chivalrous but still cusses like a sailor.

Oh and I lied. There is a bit that I don't understand, it's probably really obvious but how is this related to Rapunzel?

Ahhh... I'm sorry for the long and utterly unhelpful, gushing review (I can't help it!) but yeah, I'll stop rambling now and thank you for giving us such a gem to read!
triniroo chapter 9 . 4/3/2012
I shed some tears throughout this tale. I love you for it.
baby gyrl chapter 9 . 5/3/2011
Wow. I just read this... while I should have been writing my essay... I'm an awful student, I know... and I am amazed. You did a very good job of weaving the Rapunzel story into this pirate tale, and I was surprised by the Laurie twist. Very good characters, and all in all, a very good story. :)
Iliana11 chapter 9 . 2/13/2011
Ha. I'm finally reviewing, Clar! See! I told you I would review and now I am! :D

So, fun fact. I was looking up things in Latin for a potential title for one of my own potential stories (I say potential because thus far, it has very little) and I found "Ad undas". Aside from the actual meaning of "to the waves" it also means "to hell". I just found that interesting.

Now to review the actual story. I really liked this story. It's not cliche. It's Rapunzel, but the tower is more metaphorical than physical, which I love. I absolutely love the character of Laurie, and her relationship with Jack is great! They actually have to work at it, and at the end of the day, you know they really love each other. Well done, Clar!
Guest chapter 9 . 1/7/2011
Beautiful ending loved the story keep on writing.
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