Reviews for Time Paradox
Guest chapter 5 . 8/28/2013
"You mean a widow and some orphans?"
I laughed too hard. The waffle confrontation was also gold!
Guest chapter 4 . 8/28/2013
"You let him die, then steal his dreams!"
Aaah ha ha ha ha ha this Aerith is insane.
That little detail of her pushing the barrels onto the corpses "for the hell of it" cracked right up!
Guest chapter 4 . 8/27/2013
You watch Scrubs as well? I swear, every humor fic that had ever made me laugh till my sides hurt were composed by authors who were fans of 'Scrubs'. There must be some correlation between hilarious fics and fans of good comedy.

Man, I ought to watch my DVD set soon.
Guest chapter 3 . 8/27/2013
Also, the thunderstorm trick! I like how you pepper this story with small details of badassery.
"wait a minute is that blood?" aah dead
Guest chapter 3 . 8/27/2013
Omg guy who robbed me last time. Roflmao
Guest chapter 3 . 8/27/2013
That bit with the buttons. Rooofl. So bloody true. It's only ever by some miracle I get past that in the game. If I try to time it, I'm always off by a *millisecond*. Spam Oin my rage and BEEP
Guest chapter 3 . 8/27/2013
The narration No-Longer-Emo Future Cloud gives is just bril
Guest chapter 3 . 8/27/2013
"Barrett?" Barrett asked from the door.

Slayed me
Guest chapter 2 . 8/27/2013
The Bob Marley music slayed me
Guest chapter 1 . 8/27/2013
Another Reader chapter 17 . 5/16/2013
Again, random killing (possibly? I couldn't tell whose bodies were supposed to be missing) of minor characters we met the chapter before. I could say that it's better than killing characters we might have attatchment to, but it's sort of sloppy story telling. I always think that getting rid of potentially interesting characters is a waste. But maybe they were just a one gag appearance type thing. As long as you're changing things up, can Barret occasionally babble about something different than spiders? Maybe a minor plot thread where he finally runs out of stash from grassy jack? maybe he gets a different supplier and starts speaking in iambic petameter, or something besides miss-pronouncing spiders constantly. He was almost two dimensional at the beggining, but as time went on, he became a mockery of himself. "Hur hur, Barret's high again! That's funny!"

Still, I'm interested in seeing what happens.
Another Reader chapter 16 . 5/16/2013
Wow, this chapter was... rather disappointing. I was really enjoying this story. The shift in tone sucks. There is a reason the term 'Cerberus syndrome' is usually an insult.
It feels rushed and unpolished. If you have/had that mission thing as a deadline, than that would make sense. I don't know, maybe I'm just disoriented by the genre shift. What was the point in killing Wedge, Nanaki, and Mrs. Strife? We weren't particularly attatched to them, and their deaths didn't serve any story telling purpose except to say 'shit got real folks!', which could have been handled other ways. Getting rid of characters is a cheap way to add drama. Although I'm sorta glad that Nanaki's gone- speech impediments are f'ing annoying to read! I'm hoping Barret is going to bite it next. Except for the recent buswanker incident, he's been more annoying/boring than funny for many chapters now.

Further, if you want to make unit zero batshit insane, try less rapping, and make more of his attacks and rants eldritch abomination themed. I have not read Hellsing (though I know of it,) and Zach seemed really ax-crazy despite saying perfectly sane things (from his point of view.)

On the whole, if you're dead set on making this story dark and dramatic (which alienates most of the fanbase, sense they were here for a comedy... Why do authors keep trying this when it rarely if ever works?), I'd seriously consider polishing the second half some more. I don't know why Chaos turned up when he did, I'm pretty sure wedge had met Zero before now. It also seemed that Chaos, despite being a 'god' was practically impotent, and was completely arbitrary and unnecessary. You killed the son of Mr. Die Hard so he could turn into a god that was less effective in battle than Zack/Alucard. I understand you are making it up as you go, but... try to make events follow themes and be important to the flow of the narrative. If you took Chaos out of the battle, nothing would have changed, and no one would miss it.

Speaking of making it up as you go along, I thought that it was clever that you made Tifa come back as well, AND that it worked perfectly with her reaction in 'the morning after...', since she would react the same as him to sleeping with an alt reality version of her spouse. However, if she really was back in time way back then, she totally would have called him on it when he named that drink before they got drunk.

Finally, does if OTP means one true pairing, does OTT mean one true threesome? Here's hoping it does!
Master Chaos chapter 3 . 2/14/2013
ok I loved how you made a the Word boom with the word took me a second to get it, other than that. epic story, I haven't stopped laughing.
thequietreader chapter 17 . 2/13/2013
Wow. This is... a story.
I caught up to this in a couple hours this fine caffeine-powered evening, and I've gotta admit, I did not understand roughly a third of it. (Someone's gotta get out more. That someone is me.) I have also got to admit that I adored roughly nine tenths of it. (Hey, can't have everything, right? The complexity of the plot bemuses me, that's all. I am not the sharpest light bulb in the drawer.)
(The sharpest light bulb, of course, being the broken one.)
(All credit to Jeph Jacques.)
I love the Cerebus Syndrome, though - isn't it Cerebus, not Cerberus? Just sayin'. - and this chapter especially is both entertaining and intriguing. While it took me a moment to realize exactly who the new narrator was, and exactly what gender he is in this alternate universe, once it hit me I moved on to hugely enjoying the distinct voice. Kudos for that, by the by.
If you're still in need of a beta, I would gladly offer my services. I don't post stories on FFN, but I'm a grammar Nazi, a member of the Plot-Road Maintenance Worker's Association (filling up plot holes since 800 BC!), the founder of the Punctuation Erudition Restitution Intention Of Doom (P.E.R.I.O.D.) and the copy-editor of two published books and two published short stories. Also a fan of ridiculosity and run-on sentences. Sorry 'bout that... I'm in rehab for the latter. Please contact me if you're interested!
Guest chapter 17 . 1/31/2013
Hot Damn! You really don't miss a beat do you?
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